Your Emotional API How to be a better developer by being a better human Boston.rb

@emotionalAPI John Sawers Founder and CTO of Data Simply Senior Developer at Privia Health @emotionalapi @johnksawers http://emotionalapi.com

“Emotions just make so much sense to me” — No One Ever

@emotionalAPI Cry Make a Scene Throw a Fit Whine Yell Don’t

@emotionalAPI Do 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8.

@emotionalAPI post '/feels/anger' do 
 ... 
 end 
 post '/feels/sadness' do 
 ... 
 end 
 post '/feels/fear' do 
 ... 
 end 
 post '/feels/shame' do 
 ... 
 end 
 post '/feels/joy' do 
 ... 
 end 
 post '/feels/love' do 
 ... 
 end 
 Endpoints

@emotionalAPI There’s another layer delete '/job/12', 301: '/feels/sadness' 
 put '/events/mother/visit', 301: '/feels/anger' 
 put '/baby/new', 301: '/feels/fear' 
 post '/people/co-worker/comments/jerk', 301: '/feels/anger' 
 get '/people/boss/compliment', 301: '/feels/pride

@emotionalAPI There’s another layer delete '/job/:id' 
 100.times do 
 Thread.new(post('/feels/fear') 
 end 
 20.times do 
 Thread.new(post('/feels/sadness') 
 end 
 end

@emotionalAPI It’s A Public API The Bad News

@emotionalAPI You Control The Implementation The Good News

@emotionalAPI How Your Feeling Server Works Version: HTTP/1.0 Content-Type: application/feels Content-Length: ∞ Timeout: 7200 (hint: not very well)

When The Big Feels Hit @emotionalAPI

@emotionalAPI 20 Minutes

You can control where and when you express your feelings (But you don’t have to)

@emotionalAPI get('/feels/anger').perform_later

@emotionalAPI 1. 20 Minutes 2. Delayed Jobs 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. System Properties

Why Bother? That sounds really messy

@emotionalAPI Cognitive Problems

@emotionalAPI Cognitive Problems Poorer Executive Function [1]

@emotionalAPI Cognitive Problems Poorer Short Term Memory [2]

@emotionalAPI Cognitive Problems Lower ability to handle stress and cope with crisis [3]

@emotionalAPI Cognitive Problems More self-centered [4]

@emotionalAPI Cognitive Bene fi ts

@emotionalAPI Cognitive Bene fi ts “not just in improved behavior but in measurable academic achievement.”[5]

@emotionalAPI Cognitive Bene fi ts “…process information more abstractly, integrating information to extract the gist, detecting patterns and relationships”[6]

@emotionalAPI Cognitive Bene fi ts “…judged emotional expression more accurately”[7]

@emotionalAPI Express your ideas better Social Bene fi ts

@emotionalAPI Better career advancement[8] Social Bene fi ts

@emotionalAPI Empathy! Social Bene fi ts

@emotionalAPI Help others with their emotional challenges Social Bene fi ts

@emotionalAPI Health Bene fi ts “measurable health advantage”[9]

Better Human?

Better Developer?

@emotionalAPI Code Reviews

@emotionalAPI Degraded Cognition

@emotionalAPI Distraction

@emotionalAPI Problematic Teammates

@emotionalAPI Impostor Syndrome

@emotionalAPI Interviewed, Hired, Fired

@emotionalAPI Manage & Mentor

http://frontside.io/ Senior Software Developer

More Details

@emotionalAPI 1. 20 Minutes Max 2. Delayed Jobs 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. System Properties

@emotionalAPI Talking

“…consciously recognizing the emotions reduced their impact.” David Rock

@emotionalAPI

@emotionalAPI Try Lots of Words

@emotionalAPI “I feel” vs. “I am”

@emotionalAPI It’s Just Energy

@emotionalAPI It’s Just Energy Dancing Singing Exercise

@emotionalAPI They Don’t Mean Anything

@emotionalAPI You’re Human

@emotionalAPI Fear of Loss of Control

@emotionalAPI Fear of Loss of Control A constructive way to express anger?

@emotionalAPI Fear of Loss of Control A constructive way to express anger? No such thing?

@emotionalAPI Feelings are Enumerable, not Boolean how_you_really_feel = [,…]

@emotionalAPI There’s no such thing as how you ‘really feel’

@emotionalAPI There Is No Should

“Trying not to feel something doesn’t work, and in some cases even back fi res” David Rock

@emotionalAPI 1. 20 Minutes 2. Delayed Jobs 3. It Doesn’t Mean Anything 4. You Won’t Lose Control 5. It’s Just Energy 6. Talking Makes It Better 7. All Feelings Are Valid 8. There Is Nothing You Should Be Feeling 9. Repression Doesn’t work System Properties

@emotionalAPI Do •GET /feels/anger/meaning, response: nil •self.body(:move) •@con fi dant.send_message(“I feel so sad about…”) •self.send_message(“I feel so hurt about…”)

@emotionalAPI How did I get here? “…an intensive 20-hr Weekend Retreat in which you will explore your erroneous belief systems, learn to appropriately express emotions in a manner that heals…” Purpose • Passion • Peace http://aliceamos.me/p3retreat/

A Journey Through Anger

@emotionalAPI

@emotionalAPI GET '/events/something/trivial' ⬇ POST ‘/feels/anger'

@emotionalAPI Do

@emotionalAPI Safe Space

@emotionalAPI Throw A Fit

@emotionalAPI Do: •GET /feels/anger/meaning, response: nil •self.body(:move) •@con fi dant.send_message(“I feel so sad about…”) •@self.send_message(“I feel so hurt about…”) •SafeSpace.new(throw Fit.new(“ARRRGH”))

A Journey Through Sadness

@emotionalAPI delete ‘/v5/parents/marriage’ 
 
 post ‘/v6/parents/:dad_id/set_emotional_distance/100’ 
 
 post ‘/v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer’ 
 
 delete ‘/v17/parents/:dad_id’

@emotionalAPI /v5 delete ‘/v5/parents/marriage’ do 
 20.times.do { 
 Thread.new(get('/feels/fear')) 
 Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness')) 
 Thread.new(get('/feels/blame')) 
 } 
 delete('/feels/self_worth') 
 end

@emotionalAPI /v8 post /v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer do 
 20.times.do { 
 Thread.new(delete('/v5/parents/marriage')) 
 Thread.new(get('/feels/fear')) 
 Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness')) 
 } 
 end

@emotionalAPI /v17 def ‘/v17/parents/:dad_id’ do 
 1000.times.do { 
 Thread.new(post('/v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer')) 
 Thread.new(delete('/v5/parents/marriage')) 
 Thread.new(get('/feels/anger')) 
 Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness')) 
 } 
 end

@emotionalAPI Daddy Issues

@emotionalAPI Stack Trace NoMethodError - unde fi ned method `paternal_approval’ for BossClass: /me/feels/panic.rb:9:in `initialize' /me/feels/love/daddy:14:in `none_for_you’ /me/feels/fear/mistake/guaranteed_to_be_ fi red:21:in `realize_mistake’ /me/events/releases/prod/bug_count/metrics.rb:39:in `count_bugs’

@emotionalAPI Stack Trace NoMethodError - unde fi ned method `paternal_approval’ for BossClass: /me/feels/panic.rb:9:in `initialize' /me/feels/love/daddy:14:in `none_for_you’ /me/feels/fear/mistake/guaranteed_to_be_ fi red:21:in `realize_mistake’ /me/events/releases/prod/bug_count/metrics.rb:39:in `count_bugs’

Cry

“Crying doesn’t indicate you are weak, since birth it has always been a sign to indicate you are alive” — attributed to Charlotte Brontë

@emotionalAPI /v17 def ‘/v17/parents/:dad_id’ do 
 1000.times.do { 
 Thread.new(post('/v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer')) 
 Thread.new(delete('/v5/parents/marriage')) 
 Thread.new(get('/feels/anger')) 
 Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness')) 
 } 
 end

@emotionalAPI Diff def ‘/v17/parents/:dad_id’ do 
 1000.times.do { 500.times.do { 
 Thread.new(post('/v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer')) 
 Thread.new(delete('/v5/parents/marriage')) 
 Thread.new(get('/feels/anger')) 
 Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness')) 
 } 
 end

@emotionalAPI Diff get ‘/me/events/releases/prod/bugs/count_high’ do 
 Thread.new(get('/feels/unloved')) 
 Thread.new(get('/feels/panic')) 
 puts 'oops' 
 fi x_it 
 move_on 
 end

@emotionalAPI Baggage

@emotionalAPI Emotional Mentorship You can do this work on your own But it’s more powerful and rewarding to do it with others.

@emotionalAPI Open Sourcing Mental Illness is a campaign founded by Ed Finkler to change how we deal with mental health in the tech community. https://osmihelp.org/ @OSMIhelp

@emotionalAPI Self Awareness (Monitoring)

@emotionalAPI Do: •GET /feels/anger/meaning, response: nil •self.body(:move) •@con fi dant.send_message(“I feel so sad about…”) •self.send_message(“I feel so hurt about…”) •SafeSpace.new(throw Fit.new(“ARRRGGH”) •SafeSpace.new(:cry) •Service start nagios •Week.days.each(:practice) •con fi g.treads = false •self.get_help(:therapist_service)

@emotionalAPI Best Practices

@emotionalAPI Pick One Thing

@emotionalAPI No overnight success

@emotionalAPI You’re Never Done

@emotionalAPI It’s OK

Soft Skills Super Hard Skills

@emotionalAPI DEEP BREATH

@emotionalAPI Thank You So Much This is just the start Mailing List: http://emotionalapi.com Twitter: @emotionalAPI

@emotionalAPI Come get a feeling wheel! I’d love to hear what your ‘one thing’ is

@emotionalAPI References [1],[2] “…a lack of power impairs our cognitive function.’ Amy Cuddy, Presence 119 [3] “In fact, people who have a high sense of personal control…cope signi fi cantly better in crisis…because their executive functions are intact” Amy Cuddy, Presence, 136 [4] “Powerlessness makes us self-absorbed” Amy Cuddy, Presence 121 [5] “Helping children improve their self-awareness and confidence, manage their disturbing emotional impulses and increase their empathy pays off not just in improved behavior but in measurable academic achievement.” — Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence xi [6] “The [people who feel] powerful process information more abstractly, integrating information to extract the gist, detecting patterns and relationships” Smith, P.K., Dijkterhuis, A, & Wigbuldus, D.H. Psychology Science, 19, 1258-1259 [7] “Subjects made to feel powerful judged emotional expression more accurately.” Amy Cuddy, Presence 127 [8] “…having high leadership potential were far stronger in EI competencies…” Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence xiii [9] “Those who can mange their emotional lives with more calm and self-awareness … have … distinct and measurable health advantage … confirmed by many studies” Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence xi [10] “…when they were asked to name the emotion, the ventrolateral prefrontal cortex activated and reduced the emotional amygdala reactivity. In other words, consciously recognizing the emotions reduced their impact.” David Rock, Your Brain At Work 127 [11] Gross found that people who tried to suppress a negative emotional experience failed to do so. While they thought they looked fine outwardly, inwardly their limbic system was just as aroused as without suppression. Trying not to feel something doesn’t work, and in some cases even backfires. David Rock, Your Brain At Work 119