Your personal leadership pitstop

by Linda van de Vooren

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YOUR PERSONAL LEADERSHIP PITSTOP Linda van de Vooren Testnet oct 2024

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WHAT’S ON THE AGENDA? Activity Goal definition / creation Some theory 11:00 Break 11:30 Activity More theory Goal update / review The plan

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All material shown and used will be shared

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• Be respectful towards each other • This is a confidential space, don’t share outside of it • Devote your full attention to the person that speaks, actively listen • Feel free to ask follow-up questions if needed • Share your appreciation • Allow each person to take their time to complete their thoughts, be patient • Silence is okay, it can create space • Remember the humanity of others • Expressing one’s emotions is not about attacking or invalidating others, including you • Mistakes will be made • Believe in our commen best intentions • If you feel unsafe in any way and want to talk about it? You talk to me or you can contact me via email ([email protected])

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Masterplan LindavandeVooren.nl/masterplan

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COMMUNICATION

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What is communication? What is respect? How do you treat someone with respect?

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What is feedback? How do you give feedback? How do you deal with ‘waardeoordelen’- judgement of your values?

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Circle of Covey

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Interpersonal Circumplex (Rose of Leary)

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Above Under Opposed Togethe r Dominance Submission I We

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Above Under Opposed Togethe r Submission I We Dominance Leading Helping Cooperative Dependent Withdrawn Rebellious Offensive Competitive Listen to me We like each other I will do what you want me to do Help me Leave me alone Despise me Be afraid of me See how good I am?

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Above Under Opposed Togethe r Above behavior leads to together behavior Under behavior leads to opposed behavior Opposed behavior leads to opposed behavior Together behavior leads to together behavior

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COMPETENCE

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Competent Concious Incompetent Concious Competent Unconcious Incompetent Unconcious

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Core Qualities

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Core Quality Pitfall Challenge Allergy Too much of Too much of Positive opposite Positive opposite

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Win-Lose

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Responsibility and trust

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What is responsibility? How do you experience it? When do you have it? How do you know you have it? Who do you think is a responsible person? Do people see you as a responsible person? Do you know someone who thinks they are responsible, but aren’t?

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RESPONSIBILITY = THE ABILITY TO CHOOSE OUR RESPONSES

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Misapprehension

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Misapprehension Control Task Duty Have to / Must Owe

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Misapprehension How can you detect it? Control Task Duty Have to / Must Owe

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Misapprehension How can you detect it? Control ‘If you want it done right…’ Task Giving someone tasks ‘It is my task to..’ Duty ‘I have to because..’ Have to / Must Passivity, expectation, reactive ‘It’s my job, so…’ Owe Shame

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• Angst • Being right • Surviving • Past • Control • Reaction • Resistance • Loss/loss • You ‘the other person’ • Love • Happiness • Live • Future • Creation • Action • Surrender • Win/win • I ‘together’

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• I am rejected • I don’t belong • I am not good enough / I am not worth it • I fail

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SO, WHAT IS RESPONSIBILITY REALLY?

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You always deliver input Utilize your influence in a win-win way

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Look at / adjust your input Intention + Action = Result

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You don’t have to understand how you are responsible, to be responsible By acknowledging how you are responsible you can create results, freedom and power in your life

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To experience responsibility you need to have had a/the choice to Obligation can be given, responsibility is chosen

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The way you communicate reveals your feeling of responsibility Victim Responsible I have to do it I want to do it I can’t do it I can do it I fail I will try

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Responsibility is not your duty, and your duty is not your responsibility The two are often confused with each other

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You don’t owe responsibility Owing up to things means: You acknowledge your input in a moral judgement or situation. If owing is why you ‘accept’ responsibility, then you don’t actually have responsibility

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You can’t make someone responsible, you can teach it You alone are responsible for your input. You can point out the input of others to them, but they then choose to be responsible (or not..)

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DISC

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Dominance Influence Steadiness Conscientiousness

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What is it not?

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The Winner The Peacekeeper The Analyst The Enthusiast

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Primary reactive

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Secondary reactive

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Extravert Introvert

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Primary reactive Secondary reactive Task oriented People oriented

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Assessment

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Profile types

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Characteristics 51 • Positives Direct Even-tempered Analytical Outgoing

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Characteristics 52 Direct Results-oriented Even-tempered Accommodating Analytical Reserved Outgoing Enthusiastic • Positives

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Characteristics 53 Direct Results-oriented Firm Even-tempered Accommodating Patient Analytical Reserved Precise Outgoing Enthusiastic Optimistic • Positives

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Characteristics 54 Direct Results-oriented Firm Strong-willed Even-tempered Accommodating Patient Humble Analytical Reserved Precise Private Outgoing Enthusiastic Optimistic High-spirited • Positives

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Characteristics 55 Direct Results-oriented Firm Strong-willed Forceful Even-tempered Accommodating Patient Humble Tactful Analytical Reserved Precise Private Systematic Outgoing Enthusiastic Optimistic High-spirited Lively • Positives

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Characteristics 56 • Makes decisions quickly • Isn’t afraid of risks or conflicts • Likes a competitive atmosphere • Sets their own rules • Likes familiar processes • Listens carefully and shows understanding • Wants ot be supportive • Wants to maintain peace • Completes tasks accurately • Plans things carefully • Expects a lot of themselves • Has an analytical mindset • Establishes connections wth other quickly • Finds it easy to express feelings • Froms connections between people • Enjoys the spotlight • Positives

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Characteristics 57 • Negatives Aggressive Slow Critical Impulsive

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Characteristics 58 • Negatives Aggressive Demanding Slow Stubborn Critical Fussy Impulsive Glib

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Characteristics 59 • Negatives Aggressive Demanding Confrontational Slow Stubborn Passive Critical Fussy Perfectionistic Impulsive Glib Superficial

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Characteristics 60 • Negatives Aggressive Demanding Confrontational Slow Stubborn Passive Critical Fussy Perfectionistic Impulsive Glib Superficial

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Characteristics 61 • Fears Being seen as vulnerable Being taken advantage of Change Loss of stability Offending others Letting people down Critisism and being wrong Strong displays of emotion Loss of influence Disapproval Being ignored Rejection

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Characteristics 62 • In conflict Speaks up about problems Looks to even the score Listens to others’ per- spectives Keeps their own needs to themselves Focuses on logic and objectivity Overpowers with facts Expresses feelings Gossips

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Characteristics 63 • Overuses The need to win Resulting in win/lose situations Modesty Passive resistance Compromise Analysis Restraint Optimism Praise

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Characteristics 64 • Values Competency Action Concrete results Personal freedom Challenges Loyalty Helping others Security Quality Accuracy Coaching and counselling Freedom of expression Democratic relationships

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Characteristics 65 • Influences others by Assertiveness Insistence Competition Accomodation Consistent performance Logic Exacting standards Charm Optimism Energy

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Characteristics 66 • Could improve effectiveness through Patience Empathy Displaying more self- confidence Revealing their true feelings Acknowledgement of others’ feelings Looking beyond data Being more objective Following through on tasks

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Characteristics 67 • Biggest challenge Show patience Display sensitivity Explain the details Allow for deliberation Quickly adapt to change Unclear expectations Multitask Promote themselves Confront others Overcome indecisiveness Resist over- accommodation Resist being overly critical Overanalysing Isolating themselves Let go of and delegate tasks Compromise for the good of the team Join in social events and celebrations Make quick decisions Get organized Research (all) facts Resist impulses Speak directly and calmly Stay focussed for long periods Follow through (completely)

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Characteristics 68 • Classical roles Creator/Developer Result-oriented Inspirational Creative Specialist Achiever Agent Investigator Objective thinker Perfectionist Practitioner Promoter Persuader Conselor Appraiser

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Characteristics 69 • Usually has these goals Strive for unique accomplishments Explore new opportunities Maintain control Achieve independence Get bottom-line results Cultivate harmony Create stability Strive for team accomplishments Find group acceptance Achieve power through formal roles and positions of authority Maintain status quo and control of the environment Stick to objective processes Be accurate and correct Demonstrate stability and reliability Attain knowledge and expertise Continue personal growth Attain victory with flair Pursue friendships and happiness Achieve status through authority and prestige Seek approval and be popular Generate excitement

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Leadership style 70 Commanding Resolute Pioneering Inclusive Humble Affirming Deliberate Humble Resolute Energizing Pioneering Affirming