5-5 Activity_ Layer Your Anchor - TMM Module 5 Mon, 3/21 9:23PM 8:34 SUMMARY KEYWORDS kids, layer, unloading, dishwasher, adding, routine, lunch, sandwiches, work, naptime, clear, table, end result, anchor, activity, rhythm, prep, playing, put, family SPEAKERS Patricia Sung Patricia Sung 00:01 Hey there successful mama, we are in module five. And we're looking at an example of the rhythm or routine that you're putting around lunch. Patricia Sung 00:09 So, as an example, when I said, you know, start with a really simple, a really simple routine. And I said, I'm not sure pick lunch. So here we are lunch, we started with the basic one of prep do reset. So that's the part in blue here. So lunch prep do reset is you make the sandwiches. So the table, everyone needs to clear the table. Okay, that's the basic of, like, prep, do a reset of a routine. This is what it looks like when it's layered. Now, do not try to do all of these things again, like at one time, okay? Patricia Sung 00:49 I'm gonna say that 400 times, because you're gonna want to be like, and this is our new lunch routine. And we're gonna do all 70 of these things at one time, make it up, make sure you got to do, I'm sorry, the prep do reset in place, then we layer on. So at completion, it will look like this. But you're going to layer on as you go. Patricia Sung 01:08 So the first step would be, and you're making sandwiches. Everyone sets the table, we eat, we clear the table together, because you have to teach your kids how to do that. Okay. And then maybe the first thing you do is unload the dishwasher. And we were like, Okay, this makes sense. I can do that in this time. You move on, but you might be like, No, my kids are being hooligans. This other work. So your first layer might actually be after we clear the table, what are my kids going to do? While I do a couple of things here, like do I need to start them in an activity? Do I need to get them down for their nap first? Do you know do we need to get out the 

crayons so they can color while I work on this? That may be your first step like this is all going to depend on like how old your kids are, you know, if you're doing this with two and three year olds, that's going to take more training before you you know, if you're talking about like a nine or 10 year old can go occupy themselves. So this is all very like child dependent, of course. And so your first layer might be getting your kids occupied so that you can do something after lunch. And then you could focus on adding these ones not all the same time, unloading the dishwasher, loading the dirty dishes back in the dishwasher, and then flipping the laundry before you consider your lunchtime routine complete. Patricia Sung 02:40 Then as you feel comfortable adding those things in, then it's like, okay, are my kids comfortable enough now where they could clear the table while I start unloading dishes, again, age dependent on whether or not that makes sense for you. Like I mentioned earlier, I generally don't add things on beforehand, because our brains tend not to realize that we need to be doing something until it's already time. Where the only time you'll see me contradict that is that I do like to use right before an anchor to like clear and pick up things and put stuff away. Patricia Sung 03:18 So for example, if say this is like a, if you're a stay at home mom, or maybe this is your Saturday where the kids are all playing role playing, everyone's having a lovely time. And then we want to clear like and put away the things before we start the next task. So like teaching your kids how to clean up that is a whole like job in itself. So one of the things that I'm going to mention later, but I'll say it now like, oh, anytime that you're introducing a routine, you always want to focus on you first, adding your family into the mix is secondary. So this is like I'm showing you like the very end result. This is what it's gonna look like, in a couple months. This is now what it looks like tomorrow or next week. Okay? Patricia Sung 04:01 If your kids have never picked up toys on their own before, they're not going to this isn't going to happen next week, because they have to learn how to do that. Okay. So everyone's playing, and then you say, Okay, it's time to wrap up. I'm gonna start making sandwiches. If your kids are old enough, you're like, Hey, can you put these this like arts and crafts stuff away while I start making sandwiches? So you're making sandwiches and probably yelling, I said, What? The grands way, and they're putting it away. Then when they're done, they come over, they help take things to the table. Everyone eats together and then they're starting to clear the table while you start cleaning up and they know like after lunch, we are going to go do this activity so your kids will start to adopt this rhythm as you go. But again, always you first. Everything starts with you don't worry about everybody else what you're doing. Patricia Sung 04:53 Starts with you and the family will come along with it as you go. So like a realistic goal for the next Couple of weeks would be, you're doing whatever activity with the kids, everyone puts everything away. Or maybe it's they keep playing while you go make the sandwiches. And then 

everything away. Or maybe it's they keep playing while you go make the sandwiches. And then when you're done the sandwiches on the table ready to go, then you go teach them how to clean up the stuff. And you all come together to the table eat, you're showing them how to clear the table. And then, you know, putting the dishes in the dishwasher like that's further ahead, right. Patricia Sung 05:34 In the meantime, where you should be looking is we're all playing, I'm gonna make some sandwiches, we all eat together, clear the table, unload the dishwasher. Clean up the lunch, if we go back about a day, then we start layering on more as we go. Right? So this is like the pie in the sky end result. That's coming months from now? Not tomorrow. Okay. So I want to, I want you to have a taste of like, where you can be what this looks like in the future. But know that it takes time. I know, like, Patricia will get there, I promise. Patricia Sung 06:21 Okay, so here's your activity is layering your anchor, I want you to choose two or three things that you can test based on location and timing to this first one. Again, we're not adding them all at the same time. But so you kind of know where you're headed. The next couple things you're going to add. And I want you to think about an order that is realistic, not idealistic. So, you know, dial it back of it, what can we realistically do, and then try adding one of those layers at a time. So prep do reset when you feel good about that. Add one other task, that's not the actual like eating of lunch. Patricia Sung 07:03 I want you to think about in your daily check in like what's working, what's not working, adjusted as you need. This is a big science experiment. So if you thought unloading the dishwasher was going to be great at lunchtime, and then you realize your kids are just too tired. And it's naptime. Like don't do it, then get your kids down for a nap first and then you can circle back or maybe dishwasher unloading needs to go at a different time in the day where people aren't tired and grumpy. Know that it is going to be an adjustment as you go it depends on you and your family and your and where you are, what are the things that are going to make sense for you. But the one that I gave you is literally just an example. I don't expect your lunch routine to look like that one. Like that's not even my lunch routine. I just gave you an example. Patricia Sung 07:48 Okay. Now, optional, share what your plan is. And then on the layer your anchor posts, and then underneath in the replies in a few days go in and say like, Hey, this worked, or this didn't work, and put some feedback in there so that the rest of the group can see like, Okay, this didn't work. Why? Okay, that's good information for me that might help me or like, oh, well, I was thinking about that. But yeah, that's naptime. That's not gonna work. Okay. So this is the 

that accountability of Checking in now. If you are stuck, you can check into the weekly meetings. You can ask for feedback in the post on the community and of course, thinking about when you watch the next video, and I will see you shortly