Nansmi

Smitesh Makwana's Story

Transcript

1. 1 Nansmi : Its true lovestory… Nansmi - Its true love story Written by : Smitesh Makwana Smiteshmakwana.blogspot.com smiteshmakwana@gmail.com +919723498208
2. 2 Nansmi : Its true lovestory… I love you Mom- Dad I love you Nancy I love you all always…. Smitesh Makwana Smiteshmakwana.blogspot.com smiteshmakwana@gmail.com +919723498208
3. 3 Nansmi : Its true lovestory… Kuch baten eisi hoti he jise koi bata nahi skta. Kuch baten itni gehri aur saff hoti he jise bina bataye bhi kahi aur sunai jati he. Mere pass aaj kuch bhi nahi kehne ke liye aur nahi sunane ke liye, fir bhi me Smitesh apne chote se dil se nikalne wali har chikh aur har dard ko ek kahani ke roop me aapke samne rakh raha hu. Yeh meri niji jindagi ki baten he fir bhi me chahta hu ke koi isko pade. Apne dil se, dimag se aur aatma se isko samje, iska ehsas kare. Mene to kuch paya tha jo anmol tha lekin ye sab kisiko manjoor hi nahi tha, isi liye yeh sab muje mile, usse pehle hi meri taqdir mujse ruth gai. Me apni yeh baten batakar kisi ko dukh, dard ya koi taqlif nahi de raha aur nahi esa kuch bhi karneka irada he. Fir bhi agar kisi ko mann dukh ya taqlif hoti he to uske liye me apne sacche dil se mafi chahta hu. Yeh meri kahani he, meri khud ki- jiska kisi ke sath koi lena dena nahi he. Yaha mene, mere jivan ke kuch aanmol aur yaadgar pal jo mene kisi khash insaan ke sath bitaye the, wo pal, wo yaden, wo baten, sabkuch aapke sath bat raha hu. Muje yakin ke sath pata he ke yeh pal muje jindagi me dobara milne wale nahi he aur woh mere khash insan ke sath bhi, meri mulakat kabhi bhi nahi hongi. Jesse Ped se gire huye patte kabhi wapis ped par lautkar nahi ate isi tarah kuch insaan jo khud apni marji se chale jate he wo kabhi bhi wapis nahi aate. Lekin unke jane ke bad jo yaden aur ehsas rehte he wo hame harpal jindagi bhar hasate he aur rulate he. Kisi ne mujse kaha tha ke samay har dard ke jakhmo ko bhar dete he lekin ye nahi kaha tha ke wo jakhmo ke bharne ke bad wo hi jakhmo ke nishan puri jindagi hume dard dete he. Muje yakin ke sath pata he ke uss insaan ki kya jagah thi, kya ehemiyat thi, kya kimat thi mere jivan me... fir bhi muje dukh aur afsos is bat ka he ke ussi insaan ke dil me meri koi jagah ya kimat nahi thi. Uss insaan ke liye me sada hi ek ganda kachra hi raha hu. Bas ek ganda kachra hu jo kisi ne apnakar, istemal karke kisi gandi jagah fenk diya tha. Jis insaan ko mene apne ghar ke mandir me, apne dil ke mandir me ek bhagvan ka sthan diya, ussi insaan ne muje ek khilona banakar khela, toda, barbad kiya aur fenk diya. Pyar to mera saccha tha ke aaj bhi me ussi insaan ka rasta dekh raha hu. Me apne yeh khas dost ko yaad karke wapis mere jivan me bulane ke liye ye sab kar raha hu. Kuch yade jo unki aur hamari thi wo yaden me unke sath sabke sath batkar Bhagwan se uss insaan ke liye dua mangta hu. Muje alvida kehna to nahi aata aur nahi dusro ki tarah “Give up” karna bhi, fir bhi mere sath ye sab jabran karvaya ja raha he. Me harroj sham savere rota hu kyoki muje dard is bat ka he ke mene saccha pyar kiya tha jo meri marji ke bina mujse jabran china gaya aur uski hi saaja, mujko hi mile. Sabke jivan me "Happy Ending" hoti he to fir mere jivan me kyun nahi? Bas itna hi…. Kehna to bahot he lekin Next Time…………. Smitesh Makwana Please kindly visit here to get more information about Smitesh Makwana : http://smiteshmakwana.blogspot.com/ Or Email me : smiteshmakwana@gmail.com Smiteshmakwana.blogspot.com smiteshmakwana@gmail.com +919723498208
4. 4 Nansmi : Its true lovestory… Meri kahani kuch is tarah se shuru hui thi. Me Smitesh Makwana ,Catholic Christian hu lekin sabhi bhagwan ka ek lauta bhakt hu. Bachpan se Gujarat ke Anand me rehta hu apne chote se parivar ke sath lekin achi Job ke liye Baroda- Gujarat me koshish kar raha tha. Meri job ki shuruat bahot hi buri tarah se hui thi. Wo mera bhutkaal tha. Me apne bhutkaal ko bhulakar aage badkar kuch banna chahta tha. Lekin mere jivan me bhi dusre logo ki tarah kuch badi badi problems thi. Meri job ki shuruat Ahmedabad me ek BPO - Customer care se hui thi. Me nightshift karta tha aur fir train se Anand ata tha apne ghar. Ek mahina kam karne ke bad mene wo job chodkar Baroda chala aaya. Baroda me fir mene Dataentry ka kam kiya aur waha se thak kar kuch naya kam ki talash kar raha tha. Mera work experience aur study, degree mere kam nahi aa rahe the isi liye mene apna job field change karke koi nayi jagah job karne ki than lit hi. Bhagwan ki krupa se September 2011 me, muje Nizampura-Baroda me ek IT firm Shrushti Web Solution me SEO (Search Engine Optimization) executive ki job mil gayi. Meri salary Rs. 5000 monthly thi jisme se me aane jane k liye train aur auto rikshaw ka kiraya deta tha. Meri office ke sabhi log bahot hi ache aur milansaar the. Mera character, nature, behavior bhi acha tha isiliye bahot hi kam samay me sabke sath me achi tarah se ghulmil gaya tha.Sabke sath masti majak ke sath sath imandari se job karta tha. Hum sabhi log bahot hi khush the. Isi samay meri mulakat ek Ninu Sarjani namki ladki se huyi jo mere hi office me mere sath kam karnewale mere collegue ki ex-classmate thi. Hamari mulakat ese hi Baroda ki City Bus me hui thi. Samay ke sath sath hum log ache friends ban gaye aur kafi karib bhi aye the. Wo ladki Sindhi parivar se thi, well educated aur achi post par thi. Uske samne me kuch bhi nahi tha fir bhi me usko pasand karta tha aur uske sath jivan bitana chahta tha. Lekin February 2012 me, meri galti ki vajah se aur hamare bich ki ek choti si galatfehmi ki vajah se hamari dosti tut gai. Mene akhri bar Ninu ko manane ke liye Rs. 250 ke gulab liye aur khuli sadak par hi usse de diya lekin usse bat jyada bigad gai. Mene hajaro koshish ki usko manane ki lekin kuch bat bani nahi aur August 2012 ki shuruat me hi "The End" ho gaya. August 2012 me, hamari company ko Google se hui Penalty ki vajah se hamari main work website ban ho gai. Office ka work lagbhag band ho chukka tha jisse muje meri job ka akhri din mil gaya. "August 30th,2012". Mera ek saal hone wala tha isi office me aur muje office bhi chodni thi. Yaha nahi meri salary bathi thi aur nahi mera experience batha tha. Isi bich mera birthday bhi aaya aur chala gaya August 18th ko. Me thak chuka tha, tut chuka tha. Mujme sochne-samjne ki shakti nahi bachi thi. Muje aage kya karna padega, kaha nayi job milegi, kuch bhi pata nahi chal raha tha. Mene pura August mahina faltu kam, Online chatting aur nayi job thundane me nikal diya. Me office me bethkar Baroda ki sabhi IT- Firms ki information thundta aur fir interview ke liye nikal jata. Work Experience bahot hi kam hone ki vajah se job bhi nahi mil rahi thi. Dekhte dekhte wo August ke din pure hone wale the meri tension bad rahi thi. Smiteshmakwana.blogspot.com smiteshmakwana@gmail.com +919723498208
5. 5 Nansmi : Its true lovestory… August 2012 ka mahina pura hone wala tha. Tabhi ek dinAugust 28th 2012 ki subah, muje office me aye huye sirf adha ghanta hi hua tha. Kam kuch nahi tha isliye mene apne Gmail (Google E-mail) open kiya, apne kuch mail check kiye aur fir se job thundne beth gaya. Ussi waqt mere Gtalk par ek message aya. Us message me wo message bhejne wale insaan ko facebook ke confirmation code ke liye madad ki jarurat thi. Yeh ek ladki thi jo mere friend circle me add hui thi jiska muje pata nahi tha. Mene socha chalo koi kam nahi he to fir kisi ko kuch help kar dete he. Yehi sochkar mene apna mobile number dekar uss ladki ke facebook ke registration me madad ki. Facebook ke confirmation ka code mere cellphone par aya jo mene code ko fir se us ladki ko Gtalk message se bhej diya lekin waha kuch mistake hui aur wo ladki ko ye code mila nahi is liye mene uske number par call kiya jo landline number tha. Me office se bahar gaya uske ghar ke landline number par call kiya aur usko facebook ke confirmation ka code de diya. Jis ladki ke sath me bat kar raha tha wo ladki khud Nancy thi. Meri Nancy. Muje sach me pata nahi tha ke Nancy mere friend circle me kese add hui thi lekin shayad yehi Bhagwan ki marji thi. Hum dono ek dusre se kafi dur the. Me Gujarat se aur Nancy Meerut - Utterpradesh se thi fir bhi hume dur se ek karne ki sajis thi. Muje pata nahi tha ke me shuruat kese karu lekin mere dil me esi koi bhi feelings uss waqt nahi thi kyoki uss waqt me sirf aur sirf kisi ki madad kar raha tha. Me aur Nancy ek dusre se samhe - dare huye the. Hum dono ki kwahish thi ke hum bahot bate kare lekin hum dono ki juban se awaj nikal nahi rahi thi fir bhi humne thodi bat kari. Ek dusre ka naam jana aur thoda parichay kiya. Fir humne call cut karke, ek dusre se gtalk se online chatting karne lage aur hamari friendship hui. humne bato bato me ek dusre ka online hone ka waqt jana aur alvida hue. Pata nahi yeh kis tarah ki shuruat thi lekin muje uski awaj acchi lagi thi. Nancy ki awaj sidhe dil ko chu jati thi. Pyari awaj thi. Nancy apna jyadatar waqt ghar par bitati thi. Ghar ka kam karthi thi. Isliye wo fix time par online hoti thi aur mujse chat karti thi. yeh sab mere jivan me pehlibar tha. Mene pehli bar kisi par vishwas kiya aur apne dil ki bat mankar thoda aage bada. Nancy shuruat ke dino me muje "Partner" kehkar bulati thi, jo muje acha nahi lagta tha. Mere mana karne par wo fir muje "Smith ji" kehkar bulane lagi thi. Me hum dono ke dil ki bat aur feelings ko jaan gaya tha lekin thoda me andar se ghabra raha tha. Lekin mene kuch din bad himmat kakre Nancy ko online hi propose kiya aur usne “yes” bol diya.. wo din aaj bhi muje yaad he. Bas fir kya tha hamari lovestory yaha se start ho gai... Nancy kabhi bhi apna photograph kisi bhi social networking site par nahi rakhti thi. Jab ki mere pass mera khud ka Blog tha jaha par mere bahot sare photographs, poems aur videos the. Nancy hamesha mere poems ko pasand karti thi aur shuruat ke dino me me sirf aur sirf uske liye hi poems likhta tha. Mene Nancy ko aaj tak face to face dekha nahi aur mila bhi nahi lekin hum ek dusre ko bahot jaldi milne ke liye bechein ho rahe the. Nancy ke paas uska khudka koi cellphone nahi tha. Sirf ek landline number tha aur wo bhi uske ghar ka jo usne diya tha. Me hamesha ussi ghar ke number par hi phone karta tha aur kabhi kabhi hum online chatting bhi karte the.Nancy ki vajah se mere mann dil aur jivan mese tanhai dard dukh chinta aur meri badnasibi chali gai aur ek naya josh mila jine k liye aur wo bhi meri Nancy k liye. Smiteshmakwana.blogspot.com smiteshmakwana@gmail.com +919723498208
6. 6 Nansmi : Its true lovestory… Hum dono khush the bahot bahot bahot fir bhi muje uske background ke bare me kuch bhi pata nahi tha. Meri pasand - Napasand, khana pina, sona uthna sabkuch Nancy ko pata chal gaya tha lekin muje uske bare me kuch bhi pata nahi tha. Mene kabhi bhi usse juth nahi kaha kyoki me usse kuch bhi chupana nahi chahta tha jiski vajah se kuch misunderstanding ho jaye aur hume alag hona pade. Mera manna tha ke apne partner se juth bolne ka matlab he uske visvas ko todna. Me meri Nancy ko behad pyar karta tha, uske liye har wo chij jo mumkin he karna wo sab kar raha tha to fir juth bolkar uska vishwas kese todta ? Hum takriban ek mahina bat ki fir hamara contact tut gaya. Wo September – October 2012 ka waqt tha. Lekin October 2012 me muje nayi job mil chuki thi. Baroda ki ek IT-Firm Tech Publication me. Fir ek din mene apna work experience certificate lene ke liye mene meri purani office SWS Nizampura – Baroda par call kiya aur appointment le liya. Usi din me apni purani office gaya aur mera work experience certificate lekar auto rikshaw se return aaraha tha. Rickshaw me me akela tha tabhi mere cellphone par ek message aaya. Rickshaw se utarne ke bad mene apne cell phone me talktime recharge karvaya kyoki mere cellphone me bat karne yogya talktime balance nahi tha aur fir uss message wale number par mene call kiya. Wo number Nancy ke chote bhai ka tha, ye number wala cellphone Nancy ke pass ghar par rehta tha. Mene Nancy ke sath bat kari aur uss din ke bad meri life fir se meri pyar ki patri par chal padi. Nancy muje har roj ussi number wale cellphone se ek message bhejti thi aur message k jariye batati thi ke aaj ke din bat hogi ya nahi hogi. Me har roj savere office pahochne se pehle vodafone ki Rs.30 vali ek talktime recharge coupon leta tha. Me apne breaktime lunch time jo sirf 35 minutes (12:00 se 12:35) hi the usme se apna khana pura karke me Nancy ke sath bat karta tha. Uske sath bat karke mera din bahot hi achha bit ta tha. Usse bat karne ke badmera pura dyan mere kam me laga rehta tha. Khush hokar sabke sath majak masti ke sath me apna kam karta tha jisse mere supervisor aur senior bhi khush rehte the........... Diwali aur Christmas 2013 ki vacation me humlog bat nahi kar paye kyoki Nancy ke parivarwale sabhi log ghar par the aur Nancy ke pass cellphone bhi nahi tha. Wo do vacation hamare liye bahot hi bure rahe the. humdono fir se bat karne ke liye bechein ho rahe the. Smiteshmakwana.blogspot.com smiteshmakwana@gmail.com +919723498208
7. 7 Nansmi : Its true lovestory… Nancy ke pass koi bhi khudka cellphone nahi tha, to hamesha me usko cellphone kharidne ke liye baat karta tha. Me hamesha Nancy se kehta ke woh apne dad se baat kare cellphone ke bare me taki uske dad usko naya cellphone dilvaye. Lekin Nancy hamesha muje mana karti thi woh kehti thi ke cellphone ke usse koi jarurat nahi he. Lekin sach baat to ye thi ke Nancy ke pariwar wale hi nahi chahte the ke uske pass koi phone ho. Fir February 2013 me, humdono ne ek dusre ko milne ke liye plan banaya tha. Plan yeh tha ke muje Gujarat se Uttarpradesh jana tha akele uske ghar. Milne ki tarikh fix ho gai thi. Isliye mene ekdin sham ko railway reservation karvaya. Aane jane ka plan ban gaya tha lekin waha Utterpradesh me rehna aur fir akele Nancy ke ghar jana pehlibar thoda ajib tha- thoda risky tha fir bhi me ready ho gaya. Nancy hamesha Sunday mass ke liye St. Joseph Church Beghambagh me jati he to mene rehne ke liye St. Joseph Church Beghambagh ko chuna lekin uske liye muje apne parish priest se milna tha. Me church me bahot hi kam jata hu isliye mere parish priest se milna thoda muskil tha. To me ek sunday ke din apne yaha St. Joseph Church Karamsad ke parish priest ke pass chala gaya. Mene waha 2 ghante wait kiya lekin priest mile nahi aur muje khali hath ghar par wapis ana pada. Jab ghar wapis aya to mene dekha ke sab log mera wait kar rahe the. Sabne mujse puchtach ki to mene bina kuch chupaye sab kuch sach sach bata diya. Mere mom dad ne meri railway ki ticket mujse lekar apne pass rakhli aur Nancy ke photographs mangvane ke liye mujse kaha. Mom dad khush the lekin mere plan ki vajah se woh thode chinta me the. Dusre din mene fir Nancy ki mafi mangkar sari bat batai aur uske photographs bhejne ke liye request ki. Ussi din mere mom dad ne mera reservation cancel karva diya. Kuch din bad Nancy ne bahot hi muskil se muje March 2013 me ek letter ke sath apna ek photograph bheja jo kisi grouph photograph se cut kiya hua tha. Letter mere liye tha lekin sabne wo letter pada aur last me muje mila.Wo letter ko mom ke kehne par hamare ghar ke mandir me rakh diya. Me wo letter bar bar padta tha kyoki uss letter se muje ek sacche pyar ka anand milata tha. Wo letter aur photograph aaj bhi me padta hu. Mere ghar ke sabhi logo ko ye photograph pasand aye. Nancy ne uss letter me bahot kuch likha tha, wo sacchi feelings thi sirf aur sirf mere liye. Smiteshmakwana.blogspot.com smiteshmakwana@gmail.com +919723498208
8. 8 Nansmi : Its true lovestory… Nancy ne muje apne letter me mera bhi photographs manga tha aur wo letter usne dusre address par mangvaya tha jo uske ghar me kam karnewale ek gardener (Sandip Yadav) ke ghar ka address tha. Meri salary kam thi fir bhi mene Nancy ke liye apni bachai hui saving me se ek cellphone @ Rs 1700 ka online karida lekin usme mera ATM card block hua lekin kese bhi karke ye gift, letter aur mera passport size photograph ek courier se uske diye gaye address par mene bhej diya. Mene Nancy ko mana kiya tha ke kabhi bhi ye naye mobile ki baat mere ghar par na kare warna mere parivar wale meri jaan le lenge. Nancy ke pass koi Identity Proof nahi tha to usne mere pass simcard ki wish ki lekin wo me yaha se nahi bhej sakta tha to mene Nancy ke ghar par kam karne wale mali (Sandip yadav) ko request kiya ke woh Nancy ko help kare naya simcard dilvane me. Sandip ji ne meri request mankar Nancy ko unka khudja simcard de diya aur unhone apne liye naya simcard kharid liya. Uske bad hum dono ke pass cellphone ho gaya. Mere kehne par Nancy ne mere pure ghar walo k sath bate kari. Mere pariwar walo ne usko ek beti ki tarah apnaya aur swikar kiya. Nancy hamesha phone par masti karti, hasti rehti aur khush rehti. Usko khush dekhkar me bhi khush hota tha. Wo muje mann se apna husband man chuki thi jiska jikr wo bar bar mere samne karti thi. Nancy hamesha apni pocketmoney se hamare dono ke phone me recharge talktime balance karvati thi, jiske liye me mana karta tha kyoki Nancy ki pocket money uske personal use ke liye thi woh mere liye nahi thi nahi mere sath bat karne k liye thi. Sham savere kabhi bhi hum dono aaram se bat karte the. Bato bato me mene jan liya tha ke Nancy ko Green Colour bahot pasand he aur usko Baby doll ki tarah sajna savarna bhi acha lagta tha. Wo khana bahot kam khati thi aur davai bahot jyada. Wo khana bahot hi acha banati thi aur hamesha apne gum me rehna pasand karti thi. Use baccho ke sath rehna acha lagta tha aur Teacher banna uska sapna tha. Meri mom ke sath bazaar me shopping karna wo bhi ek sapna tha uska. Wo Hamesha mujse shararat karti thi jo muje acha lagta tha. Eaisi thi meri pagal nadan Nancy. Smiteshmakwana.blogspot.com smiteshmakwana@gmail.com +919723498208
9. 9 Nansmi : Its true lovestory… Ek bar Nancy ke ghar ke padosh me shadi thi aur barat ayi hui thi tabhi Nancy ne muje call kiya tha. Wo sham ka waqt tha. Waha band baja baj raha tha kafi shorgul tha, aur uski dhun se Nancy bahot hi khushi ke mare pagal ho chuki thi, esa lagta tha ki shadi uske hi ghar ho rahi ho. Sach me pagal thi. Me apni office se nikal kar Railway station pahocha tha. Aur Nancy ka yeh roop dekhkar me darr gaya tha. Ek bar Nancy ne raat ko apne Fridge se pani ki jagah daru ki bottle uthakar pi liya tha aur usne mere samne confession bhi kiya tha lekin wo bat se muje bahot hi jyada bura laga tha kyoki me nahi chahta tha ke meri Nancy kisi aisi waisi chij ko hath bhi lagaye. Ek bar Nancy mere sath bat kar rahi thi, kuch kam ke vajah se woh phone par baat karte karte chaat ki aur jane lagi tabhi uska dupatta kahi fansh gaya aur uske hatho se uska cellphone gir gaya wo bachane ke liye Nancy ne jump kiya tha lekin cellphone ko ek kharoch bhi nahi ane di thi. Jab mene usko yeh harkat ke bare me pucha to usne bataya ke yeh phone aapne apni mehnat ki kamai se liya tha to usko kese barbad karti. Ek bar sham ko me Baroda railway station par tha aur Nancy se bate kar raha tha ussi waqt Nancy ko kuch ho gaya tha jisse wo behosh ho chuki thi. Rat ko uske dad ne usko medical me admit karvaya jaha uska ilaj hua tha. Yeh wo din tha jab me pehli bar Nancy ke liye roya tha aur uske health ke liye mene Bhagwan ko vinti kithi. Jab me usko call karta to uska boyfriend nahi lekin uska husband bankar bat karta tha jo apni wife se bahot dur he aur apni wife se bahot bepanah sacchi mahobbat karta he. Me bata nahi sakta ke me kitni khusi mehsus kar raha tha kyoki ye mera saccha aur pehla pyar tha. Muje aaj tak kabhi bhi ese pyar ka anubhav ya ehsas hi nahi hua tha. Hum log ek dusre se dur the aur nahi ek duje ko dekha tha lekin hamara pyar hamari mahobbat saccha aur pakka tha... Smiteshmakwana.blogspot.com smiteshmakwana@gmail.com +919723498208
10. 10 Nansmi : Its true lovestory… Mene kabhi bhi Nancy ko dhoka dene ke bare me nahi socha. keval wohi ek mere dil dimag atma aur jism me basi hui thi aur aaj bhi he. Woh aaj bhi meri parchai he. Uski yaden aaj bhi mere anshu me behti he, mere hoton par hassi bankar rehti he. Jabtak mene job ki tab tak Nancy ke alava meri life me pehle ek Kinjal jo married thi aur uske bad ek Akshali namki ladki ayi thi jo mere hi junior collegue the aur unke sath mera acha rishta tha ek sacche dost ka lekin ye sari bate mene bina kuch chupaye Nancy se share ki. Mene kinjal aur akshali ke sath sirf dosti thi, kabhi bhi uske aage nahi bada. Nancy aur akshali ki birthday same date par thi aur wo meri collegue thi to Nancy akshali se behad nafrat karti thi, kyoki mene ek bar ese hi Nancy ko jalane ke leye bola tha ke Akshali bahot hi hot, sexi and beautiful girl he. Me nahi janata tha ke Nancy akshali ko lekar kyu itna react kar rahi he lekin fir bhi Nancy k mann me kuch chal raha tha jo me kabhi bhi nahi jan paya . Nancy ko darr tha ke me Nancy ko chodkar Akshali ke apnauga aur Nancy ko bhul jauga. Akshali ko lekar ekbar Nancy ne gussa hokar apne hatho me kanch tod dia tha aur mere sath jagda bhi kiya tha, mene usko khub manaya, sab kuch try kiya lekin wo nahi maan rahi thi fir bhi mene usko mana liya. Nancy ke words uski baten mere dil ko chir gai thi. Muje meri galti ka ehsaas hua tha. Muje mere sacche pyar ke khone ka ehsaas hua tha, dukh hua tha. Mene Nancy ko promise kiya tha ke me akshali se dur rahuga aur wo hamare dono k bich nahi ayegi... Kai bar hamare bich me chote mote jagde hote rahe aur Nancy sada hi naraj ho jati thi, muje acha lagta tha usko manana lekin darr bhi rehta tha ke kash wo mujse dur ho gai to me uske bina keise jiunga ya kesa hoga mera jivan. Kai bar mene meri Nancy ki awaj ko sound recording kiya tha. Uss waqt meri Nancy ka mood dekhne layak hota tha. Wo kuch pal ke liye kuch jyada hi romantic aur choti bacchi ban jati thi, to dusre hi pal wo muje pyar se, hassi se datne lag jati thi. Pagal sacchi pagal…. Smiteshmakwana.blogspot.com smiteshmakwana@gmail.com +919723498208
11. 11 Nansmi : Its true lovestory… Me chahta tha ke hamari shadi dono parivar ki marji, pyar aur aashirvad se ho jiski bate hum Hamesha karte the. Muje Nancy ke parents se kuch bhi pane ki chah nahi thi, me keval Nancy aur uske parivar k sabhi logo ka pyar aur sath chahta tha. Mere liye peise jaruri nahi he lekin maan samman aur pyar jaruri tha. Meri har kwahish meri Nancy janti thi samjti thi. Hum Hamesha apni privacy ki bate karte the, kuch achi kuch buri kuch khatti kuch mitthi baten. Hum ek dusre se behad dilo jan se pyar karte the. Hum do jism ek jaan ban chuke the. Mene jab apni job chodkar German Study karne ka socha to meri Nancy bahot hi khush hui thi. Mene study ka decision isliye liya tha kyoki me humdono ke liye kuch karna chahta tha kuch banna chahta tha taki hamara future career bright ho. Jab meri study ki shuruat hui tabhi muje savere 5:00 baje ghar se nikalna hota tha aur savere 5:45 ko meri train hoti thi Anand se Ahmedabad Memu Local. Meri Nancy harroj mere liye jaldi uthkar muje savere ek good morning ka message karti thi aur jab me train me hota tab muje "I love you" kehti thi. Wo "I love you" ki goonj aaj bhi mere kano me goonj rahi he. Wo muje pure din me 3 bar missed call kiya karti jiska matlab “I love you” tha. Jab me apni class puri karke return aata tab meri Nancy mera wait karti thi, aur jab tak me ghar par thik thak sahi salamat na pahoch jau tab tak wo bhi bhukhi pyasi mera rasta dekha karti thi. Jab me apni train miss karta tab wo muje "Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge" movie ka dialog sunati ke "Eise bade bade shahero me eisi choti choti bate hoti rehti he". Muje kuch khane pine ke liye force karti taki mujme energy bani rahe aur me jyada thak na jau. Woh mera din aur meri journey dono hi acha bana deti thi. Kabhi kabhi jab me public place me hota tab wo is moke ka faida uthakar muje barbar “I love you” kehti aur wo chahti ke me uska reply du, aur jab me public place me usko “I love you too” kehta to wo khushi ke mare pagal ho jati thi. Kuch eaisi thi meri pagal, moti, janu, chilli sauce. Wo muje pyar se Kaddu, Pakode, Bandar, Tamatar kehti thi aur me badle me usko Chilli Sauce, Moti, Janu kehta tha. Me jab bhi apne friends ya family ke sath kahi ghumne k liye jata tab me meri Nancy ko batata ke me yaha jane wala hu. Nancy ko ek parchai banakar apne sath le jata aur wapis ghar aane par uske sath pura experience ko batakar usko ehsas karvata tha. Meri kwahish thi ke me Nancy ko shadi ke bad pura Gujarat dikhau. Sabhi achi aur badi jagah par usko lekar jau. Gujarat ke sabhi mandir me usko Bhagwan ke darshan karvau. Nancy muje hamesha kehti thi k jab jab me bahar jau tab tab me sirf apne frineds aur family ke sath 100% time spend karu taki me uss pal ka sahi maja le saku. Me hamesha mandiro me Nancy ko pane ki prayer karta tha. Hamesha mere Prayer, Prasad aur Darshan me meri Nancy ka adha hissa raha tha. Me har Friday ki rat 9:45 ko Special Rosary keval meri Nancy, uski health aur mere study ke liye karta tha. Nancy ko kidney stone ki bimari thi aur wo aksar is dard se tadpati thi, me uske dard ko chhin nahi sakta tha lekin dur hokar bhi uske liye pray kar sakta tha aur wo mene kiya. Mene mannat mani aur bahot prayers bhi kiye. Ye tha mera pyar meri Nancy k liye. Smiteshmakwana.blogspot.com smiteshmakwana@gmail.com +919723498208
12. 12 Nansmi : Its true lovestory… Hamara pyar ek resham ki dori ki tarah patla aur najuk tha jo sirf vishwas ke sath, vishwas ke dum par tika hua tha. Me Hamesha meri Nancy ko kehta tha ke agar tum meri life se chali gai to me Swami Vivekanand ke math me jakar ek sanyasi sadhu ban jauga. Me tumhare liye apna ghar family friends sab chod duga. Lekin nancy hamesha ye viswas dilate ke hum dono kabhi bhi alag nahi honge aur sada hum sath rahenge aur jiyenge. Hamari mulakat August 29th,2012 me hui thi isliye har mahine ki 29th ko humdono hamari anniversary manate the. Ye sab muje Nancy ne hi sikhaya tha. Kabhi kabhi hum dur hokar bhi ek duje ke behad karib aajate the aur mano esa lagta tha ke ye hum ek duje ki parchai he mirror image he. Meri birthday ke din meri Nancy ne ek newspaper me ek acha sa column diya tha jo utterpradesh ke newspaper me 2 bar published hua tha, mere birthday aur hamare pyar k related ye column tha, ye meri birthday gift thi, meri pyar ki sacchi nishani. Yaha se yehi column se meri Nancy ne muje “Precious” kaha tha. Ek bar muje khanshi ho gai thi, jab bhi me Nancy se phone par bat karta tab khanshi shuru ho jati thi. Nancy meri khanshi ko lekar muje kafi advise ke sath sath dant bhi deti thi. Meri Nancy ko ye sab pata tha ke me underweight hu, Meri health achi nahi he, handsome nahi hu, muje bike chalali nahi ati, me ek middle class family se hu, fir bhi woh muje pasand karti thi. Meri German A1 ki exam aagai aur Nancy ne muje bahot hi jyada wish ke sath "best of luck kaha". Exam meri thi lekin esa lagta tha ke ye exam hum dono ek duje ko pane ke liye de rahe the. Nancy muje support karti thi, exam ko face karne ke liye naye naye nuskhe batati thi, aur mere liye Bhagwan se prayer -mannat karne lagi thi. Jab meri exam dopahar 3 baje finish hui tab me bahot hi thak chuka tha, bhukha pyasa tha. Kalupur Ahmedabad railway station par bhari bhid k bich me thaka hua apni train ki wait kar raha tha aur Nancy ke sath me sms se bate kar raha tha. Nancy muje support kar rahi thi, sahara de rahi thi, mera hosla - jasba bada rahi thi, aur jab tak me ghar pahocha tab tak wo mere sath hi rahi. Dekhte dekhte Diwali aa gai thi. Muje yaad he Diwali ke din shuru huye the tab mene Nancy ko kaha tha ke fatako aur dhuye se dur rehna, har roj ghar me diye jalana, baccho ke sath khelna aur khush rehna. Muje uski chinta ho rahi thi lekin muje nahi pata tha ke aage jo kuch bhi hone wala he wo behad bura hone wala he. Smiteshmakwana.blogspot.com smiteshmakwana@gmail.com +919723498208
13. 13 Nansmi : Its true lovestory… Diwali 2013 ke bad ke din mere liye mano ek musibat aur kafi dukh lekar aye the. Ye sare din mere jivan mese sari khushiyan chin ne wale the. Diwali ki holidays khatam hote hi Nancy ne muje ek sms kiya jisme likha tha ke "Me apke layak nahi hu so please muje bhul jana". Mere dil me darar ho gai thi. Mene Nancy ko call karne ke liye request kiya to usne muje call kiya. Jab wo call kar rahi thi tab wo ro rahi thi aur kuch keh rahi thi jo mere samaj me nahi aya isliye mene apna call mere uncle ko de diya taki mere uncle usse achi tarah se uske problem ka solution nikale. Nancy ne uncle se bat ki aur Nancy ne ek story sunai ke Diwali ki holidays me jo sunday tha tab wo church me gai thi waha usko ek aunty mili jo kabhi Nancy ki neighbour hua karti thi. Nancy ko dekhkar wo aunty ne Nancy ke sath bat kari aur bataya ke wo uske bete Dennis ke sath shadi kare. Nancy ne pehle mana kiya aur usne bataya ke wo kisi durse gujarati ladke ke sath relationship me. Ye sab bate pehle muje sunai to muje yakin hua lekin kuch din bad Nancy ne bat ko aage badai ki wo aunty Nancy ke ghar aaye the aur uske parents se Nancy ke rishte ki bat ki fir uske dad bhi Dennis ke ghar gaye aur rishta pakka kiya. Muje yakin nahi ho raha tha kyoki itna sab kuch hone ke bad bhi Nancy ne apne mom-dad se meri bat nahi ki thi. Mene jab Nancy ko pressure kiya hamare relationship ki bat dad ko batane ke liye tab Nancy ne kaha ke agar wo apne dad se bat karegi to uske dad mana kar denge aur uske sath jabardasti karenge. Mene Nancy ko Dennis ke bare me janne k liye kaha aur me bhi janna chahta tha ke ye Dennis kon he tab mere bahot hi jayada pressure karne par Nancy ne muje Dennis ke bare me sirf itni detail information di jo niche he [ Dennis Jacob - (no surname- kabhi diya hi nahi) Account chief at Shangrila's Eros Hotel Delhi] Pehle jab mene Dennis ki work address ke bare me Nancy se pucha to usne pehle kisi "S" se shuru hone wali hotel ka naam diya fir mene Nancy ko fir se confirm karne ke liye kaha tab Nancy ne muje "Hotel Sheritan - Delhi " ka naam diya lekin jab mene Nancy ko uske dad se confirm karvane ko kaha tab Nancy ne "Shangrila's Eros Hotel - Delhi " ka naam diya. Jab mene Nancy se uske kisi google+, facebook aur twitter ki profile link mangi tab Nancy ne mana kiya ke uske pass nahi he. Nancy ne only ek photo diya. Nancy se mene Dennis ke background ke bare me pucha to Nancy ne bataya ke Dennis uske bachpan ka dost he aur uski shadi pehle ho chuki thi, Dennis Nancy ko 8 saal se chahta tha lekin wo "one side love" tha jiske bare me Nancy ko kabhi bhi pata nahi chala. Dennis ki shadi kisi ladki se jabardasti hui thi, uss ladki Dennis se Age me badi thi. Uski shadi keval 6 mahine hi huye the aur wo ladki Dennis se dur chali gai, us situation ki vajah se Dennis ke pitaji ka death hua aur Dennis depresion me tha. Jab usne Nancy ko wapis dekha to usne fir Nancy se shadi karne ke liye apni mom se bat ki. Smiteshmakwana.blogspot.com smiteshmakwana@gmail.com +919723498208
14. 14 Nansmi : Its true lovestory… Muje Nancy ki yeh kahani kuch juthi lagi lekin Nancy ke anshu ki vajah se muje yakin karna tha. Kuch din bad November 2013, ke ek sunday ke din Nancy ne kaha ke Dennis aur uski puri family Nancy ke ghar ayi he shadi ka rishta lekar. Ye jankar mene Nancy ko kaha ke please wo mere aur Nancy ke rishte ki bat aur sab sach usko bataye, taki Dennis is rishte se na kehde. Lekin mera call pura hone ke aadhe ghante ke bad Nancy ne muje call kiya aur kaha ki Nancy ne Dennis se, jab hamare (Smitesh aur Nancy) ke rishte ke bare me bat ki tab Dennis gussa ho gaya aur Smitesh ko jaan se mar dalne ki dhamki di.... Muje ek jatka sa laga tha, muje Nancy ki bat ka yakin nahi ho raha tha tab fir se Nancy ne muje dopahar ko call kiya aur bataya ke Dennis ne Smitesh aur Nancy k rishte ki bat Nancy ke dad ko batai aur wo aaj court marriage karne wala he Nancy ke sath. Dennis bahot gussa he aur wo abhi shadi ke liye dad se bol rahe he. Me bevkuf tha ke tab me kuch bhi samj nahi paya ke wo din sunday ka tha aur Nancy ne uski court marriage ka time sham ke 4:00 baje ka diya tha. Mene ye puri bat mere mom ko batai tab mere mom ne muje samjaya ke ye ladki juth bol rahi ke kyoki sunday ke din court khula nahi hota. Ye kahani itni ulaj chuki thi ke me Nancy ko pane ki chah me khud hi andar hi andar ghusta chala ja raha tha. Ye wo daldal tha jaha se me bahar nikal sakta tha lekin mere sacche pyar ne muje waha rehne k liye majbur kiya. Uske bad Nancy ne kahani ko ese dohraya ki koi bhi insan shayad hi esi bat par yakin kare... Nancy ne kaha ke Dennis ke sath uski sagai he jo agle happte (week) he wo bhi delhi me uske ghar. Me tut chuka tha mere pass koi rasta nahi tha, muje ek dost ki jarurat thi jo muje rasta dikhaye aur mere sath rahe muje support de. Yehi sochkar mene ek bar apni promise todkar mene Akshali ko call kiya aur usko sari bate batayi, me ye bate batate batate ro pada. Akshali ne muje samjaya aur support diya jo me chahta tha. Akshali ke sath bat karne k bad mene turant hi Nancy ko do Lambe sms kiye jisme mene Nancy ko jutha kaha, mene ye bhi kaha ke usne mere sath dhoka kiya aur bahot kuch... Mera sms jate hi dusre hi second me Nancy ka reply aya jisme Nancy ne bataya ki ye sagai usne cancle ki aur wo Delhi nahi gai. Mere liye ek khushi ki bat aur ek dukh ki bat thi- khusi isliye kyoki Nancy ki sagai Dennis k sath nahi hui lekin dukh ki bat is liye k itna sabkuch hua fir bhi Nancy ne muje ek bar ye nahi kaha k usne apni sagai cancle ki. Lekin jab Nancy ne ye jana k mene Akshali k sath bat ki aur mene apni promise tod di to Nancy ne muje blame kiya. Hamare rishte ko todne ka karan bataya. Yaha kuch bate mene chupai he kyoki wo bate dohrakar me khudko aur Nancy ko taqlif dena nahi chahta. Wo bate jo muje bahot hi dard dukh deti he aur aane wale dino me bhi dengi. Smiteshmakwana.blogspot.com smiteshmakwana@gmail.com +919723498208
15. 15 Nansmi : Its true lovestory… Mene Nancy ko samjaya- bahot samjaya. Woh kabhi hamare rishte ko ek emotional attachment kehti to kabhi hamare rishte ko bandhan man leti. Woh in sab se free hona chahti thi. Mene apne pyar ke liye bhikh mangi, request kiya. Wo waqt tha December 18th 2013 ka. Nancy juthe reason batate batate mujse dur ho rahi thi aur uske samne me rota hua, tutta hua apne pyar ki bhik mang raha tha. Meri ankhon me anshu the lekin wo sirf kahani par kahani sunaye ja rahi thi. Ye bat 20th December tak chali. 20th December 2013, ko mene Nancy ko Meerut se Gujarat bulane ka plan banaya. Mene Sandip ji (Nancy's Gardener, jinhone Nancy ko sim card diya tha) se bat karke usko savere 5.00 baje Meerut ke railway station par chodne ke bad Haridwar Mail Express train me bithane ke liye kaha tha. Sandip ji bhi taiyar the. Sabkuch plan ke mutabik well set tha lekin Nancy apne ghar se bahar nikal ne ke liye mana kar rahi thi. Me usko samjata raha aur wo inkar pe inkar kar rahi thi. Uske dil me pyar tha lekin kesa pyar tha aur kitna wo sochne samjne ki meri shakti khatam ho chuki thi. Me thak chuka tha lekin me try pe try kar raha tha. Ussi din sham 7:30 baje Nancy ne muje call kiya aur kaha ke abhi Dennis aur uski family Nancy ke ghar aye he. Mene Nancy se Dennis ke aane ka reason pucha to Nancy ne bataya ke jab Nancy ne Dennis se sagai aur shadi se inkar kiya to Dennis ne suicide karne ki try ki aur usi ki vajah se wo mere ghar par aye he. Uss waqt mene fir se Nancy ko hamare (Smitesh-Nancy) rishte ke bare me Nancy ke dad ko batane ko kaha tab Nancy ne muje kaha ke abhi uske dad ki halat bahot hi kharab he. Nancy ke dad ko us waqt diabetic aur TB tha. To Nancy ne kaha ke dad ki health ki vajah se ye shadi muje karni padegi aur me karugi. Aur ye bhi bataya ke wo shadi church me priest ke hatho hogi, ring blessed karke exchange hogi. Me ek dum tut gaya, ro pada. Mere pero se jamin nikal chuki thi, ussi din aadhi rat ko 2:00 baje Nancy ne message kiya aur kaha ke ye shadi usko karni padi, Dennis uske bedroom me he aur uske liye packing kar raha he. Wo log savere Delhi jane ke liye ravana honge. Mene usi din khana nahi khaya, nahi rat ko nind ayi. bed me tha lekin sirf rota raha. Nancy ke pass ek waqt naya sim card kharidne ke liye ko identity proof nahi tha lekin usne bataya ke wo savere 4:00 baje ki flight se Delhi jayenge. Muje pata tha ke yeh sab juth he lekin mere pass ab kuch bacha nahi tha. Me gir chukka tha tut chukka tha. mere pass Nancy ke akhri message the aur hmari sound recording jo mene hamare ache dino me kari thi. Smiteshmakwana.blogspot.com smiteshmakwana@gmail.com +919723498208
16. 16 Nansmi : Its true lovestory… Mene Nancy ko kaha ke ye sab tumhare sath jabardasti hua he isliye tum abhi police station jao aur complain karo, mene fir adhi rat ko Delhi Police Commissioner, Assistant Commisioner aur Delhi women cell ka number diya lekin Nancy ne eisa kuch bhi karne ke liye mana kiya. aur kaha ke "hamare liye kuch na kuch karugi lekin aap kuch nahi karege, jo bhi karugi me khud karugi". Hum (Smitesh aur Nancy) 21st, 22nd aur 23rd tak baten karte rahe aur December 24th 2013 ki early morning hamari last thi. Isi din Nancy ne kaha ke aap apni health sudharna, kuch banna aur jis din me call karu ussi din me apke pass hamesha ke liye chali aaugi. Muje ye bhi kaha ke aap rona mat, khud ko sambhal na aur mere cellphone par savera hote hi koi sms ya call mat karna. Uska cellphone tab se lekar aaj tak sirf "Switch Off" he. Jabki Nancy ne muje kaha tha ke mera cellphone Dennis ke pass he aur simcard mene tod diya he. Bas ye thi meri kahani lekin yaha to sirf Nancy chali gai uske bad mera haal behaal ho gaya. Me harroj Bhagwan se prayer karne laga ke Nancy salamat rahe aur jaldi se wo mere pas chali aaye. Me har roj usko yaad karta tha aur rota tha. Me depresion me chala gaya tha. Mene apni davai, khana, pina, ghumna, firna sabkuch chod diya tha. Bas jine k liye hi khane pine laga tha uski vajah se meri health pehle jesi ho gai. Mera German A2 Level fir se shuru hua, study shuru hui lekin wo Nancy ke sath bitai hui sari yade, wo jagah jahan me bethe bethe Nancy se bate karta tha wo sab adhure hokar muje adhura bana rahe the. Mere jivan me kuch kami lag rahi thi. kuch mujse jabardasti china gaya tha jiski kimat bhi muje chukani thi. Me akela railway station par betha rehta tha. kabhi mene class chodkar bus station par betha rehta tha to kabhi kisi mandir par jakar Bhagwan se prayers karta tha. March 2014 me meri mulakat Baroda ke Ramkrishna paramhansh math ke ek Swami Pradip Maharaj se hui. Karamsad aur Anand me ek chota sa spiritual program tha aur us swamiji aur unke sath aaye huye 6 bhakto ka khana pina mere uncle ki company me hota tha. Yeh swamiji ne meri aur dekha aur mere pariwar ke sabhi logo ke samne unhone muje unke sath sanyas leneka nyota diya lekin mene unko fir akele me meri aur meri Nancy ki puri kahani puri sacchai batai aur ye bhi bataya ke “Me hamesha meri Nancy ko kehta tha ke agar tum meri life se chali gai to me Swami Vivekanand ke math me jakar ek sanyasi sadhu ban jauga. Me tumhare liye apna ghar family friends sab chod duga.” Yeh sunkar swamiji ne muje kaha ke tum sada uske liye Bhagwan se dua karna taki wo sada khush rahe. Me unke sath to nahi gaya lekin me ek sansarik sadhu ban gaya. Meri khushi pyar sahara sab kuch chin gaya jo me chahta tha bas reh gaya to keval mere anshu dard dukh aur dua jo keval meri Nancy ke liye hi thi. Smiteshmakwana.blogspot.com smiteshmakwana@gmail.com +919723498208
17. 17 Nansmi : Its true lovestory… Meri halat bekar si ho chuki thi isliye mene apne Jesuit spiritual father aur Jesuit brother ki help li, unhone muje support kiya, muje samjaya rasta dikhaya lekin me abhi bhi bahar nahi aa saka aur tabtak mene kabhi time barbad kar liya tha. Mene Nancy ke jane ke bad “Nansmi” namka ek Blog banaya tha jaha par me apni bate rakhta tha. March 2014 me Nancy ne fir se muje call kiya tab wo Meerut me hi thi aur waha kisi Internation School me Receptionist ki job kar rahi thi lekin wo mere pyar ko samj hi nahi rahi thi. Me fir se depression me chala gaya. Me hamari sound recording sunkar bahot bahot hi rota tha. Me khud ko akela mehsus karta tha. Agar din me ek bar mere chehre par galti se bhi muskan aati tho dusre hi pall mere ankho se anshu behne ki shuruat ho jati thi. Meri German A2 Level ki exam me me fail hua aur aaj me fir se ghar par beth gaya. Wo din fir se aa gaya jaha se mene chalne ki shuruat ki thi. Me kabhi meri Nancy ke liye "Precious" tha lekin usne muje "Garbage , looser aur Failur " bana diya. Me aaj bhi Nancy ka wait kar raha hu. Me harroj rat ko usko yaad karke rota hu kyoki wo mere liye meri wife thi, meri parchai thi jise me khona nahi chahta tha. aaj usko yaad karke mera dil tadap uthta he, mere dil dimag uskii awaj sunne k liye betab ho rahe he. Me aaj bhi uska rasta dekh raha hu. Me uski yaad me bahot roya hu. Muje yakin nahi ho raha he ke ye wo ladki he jiske sath me rehna chahta tha jina chahta tha. jiske liye mene sab kuch kurban karne ki chah rakhi ussi ne mere sath ye sab kuch kiya. Kuch saval aaj bhi muje tadpate he aur sochne par majboor kar dete he. Kya koi insaan apni beti ki shadi jabardasti sham ke waqt kisi talak wale insaan se karva skta he? Church me Divorcy ke sath shadi possible nahi to fir Nancy ki shadi church me kese hui? Nancy ke pass naya simcard ke koi identity proof nahi tha to fir Delhi jane ke liye Passport kaha se aya? Mere mann me dil me jivan me eise bahot sare saval peda ho chuke he. Muje pata nahi chal raha kea bb uska wait karu ya apni life me aage badu? Muje pata nahi chal raha he ke wok is haal me he aur yeh sab usne mere sath kyun kiya? Kis bat ki ye muje saja mil rahi he. Aaj bhi me usko behad bepanah saccha pyar karta hu aur sada karta rahuga. Mere dil me ye hamesha dard rahega ke ek ladki eisi thi jo meri thi lekin wo kabhi bhi meri na ho pai. Mene apne sare wade nibhaye lekin fir bhi me fail ho gaya. Me fail ho gaya…. Me Looser ban gaya… me ek Garbage ban gaya sada ke liye……. Smiteshmakwana.blogspot.com smiteshmakwana@gmail.com +919723498208