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A Gem of a Jam
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Hayden
July 05, 2026
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A Gem of a Jam
Hayden
July 05, 2026
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Transcript
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GUARD: *Yawns*
GUARD: *Yawns*
GUARD: *Yawns*
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SFX: Boing!
SFX: Boing!
SFX: Boing!
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SAMMY: Jackpot…
SAMMY: Jackpot…
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SAMMY: Ooh, Mama…
SAMMY: Ooh, Mama…
SAMMY: Ooh, Mama…
SAMMY: Ooh, Mama…
SAMMY: You’ve got everything I’m lookin for…
SAMMY: You’ve got everything I’m lookin for…
SAMMY: You’ve got everything I’m lookin for…
SAMMY: Uh–In a diamond, that is…
SAMMY: Uh–In a diamond, that is…
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SFX: Blades Unsheathing
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SAMMY: There we go!
SAMMY: There we go!
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SFX: Thunk!
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SFX: Thunk
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SFX: Thunk
GUARD (O.S.): Hey! SFX: Clicking
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SFX: Rattling
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GUARD: Drop the diamond, dirtbag!
GUARD: Drop the diamond, dirtbag!
GUARD: Drop the diamond, dirtbag!
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SFX: Helicopter Whirring
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SAMMY: Right on time…
SAMMY: Right on time…
SAMMY: Right on time…
SAMMY: Right on time…
SFX: CRASH!
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SAMMY: Sorry boys, you’ll have to take the next one.
SAMMY: Sorry boys, you’ll have to take the next one.
SAMMY: Toodles!
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SAMMY: *Nervous Chuckling*
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SAMMY: Dude, why haven’t you pulled me up yet?
SAMMY: Dude, why haven’t you pulled me up yet?
CONNOR: Uh…I’m trying! SFX: Helicopter Whirring, Console Beeping
CONNOR: Uh…I’m trying!
CONNOR: Uh…I’m trying!
CONNOR: Do you think we did this backwards?
CONNOR: Do you think we did this backwards?
CONNOR: Do you think we did this backwards?
CONNOR: *Strained Grunt*
CONNOR: *Strained Grunt*
SAMMY: No, we didn’t “do it backwards”!
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SAMMY (O.S.): Well, because I’m the one with the claws!
SAMMY (O.S.): Well, because I’m the one with the claws!
SAMMY: Oh god–
SAMMY: PULL ME UP NOW, JUST DO IT!!
SAMMY: PULL ME UP NOW, JUST DO IT!!
CONNOR: A-alright!!
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SFX: Helicopter Whirring (Louder)
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GUARDS: *Gasp*
GUARDS: *Gasp*
GUARDS: *Gasp*
SAMMY: Best of luck catching me!
SAMMY: Best of luck catching me!
SAMMY: Best of luck catching me!
SAMMY: A cat always lands on his–
SAMMY: A cat always lands on his–
SAMMY: A cat always lands on his–
SAMMY: –AUGH!!
SAMMY: *Pained Groan*
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SAMMY: *Pained Groan*
SAMMY: *Pained Groan*
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GUARD: I NEED ALL UNITS, STAT!!
GUARD: I NEED ALL UNITS, STAT!!
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SFX: Helicopter Whirring
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SFX: Sirens
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SAMMY: *Spitting*
SAMMY: *Coughing*
SAMMY: *Pained Groan*
SAMMY: AAH–!!
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SFX: Swish
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SFX: Swish
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SFX: Swish
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SAMMY: *Chuckle*
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SAMMY: Aw…
SAMMY: …come on!!
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SFX:Thwack!
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WOMAN: Wow, Valerie was right! Golf…
WOMAN: …is…
WOMAN: …twice as fun with two balls!
SAMMY (O.S.): *Pained Squeal*
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GUARD: All units…
GUARD: All units…
GUARD: All units…
GUARD: …follow my lead and break left!
GUARD: …follow my lead and break left!
GUARD: …follow my lead and break left!
GUARD: …follow my lead and break left!
GUARD: That squeal means our thief isn’t far!!
GUARD: That squeal means our thief isn’t far!!
GUARD: That squeal means our thief isn’t far!!
GUARD: That squeal means our thief isn’t far!!
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SFX: Tires Skidding
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MAN 1: So you’re down to go to baked bear
after this?
MAN 1: So you’re down to go to baked bear
after this?
MAN 1: So you’re down to go to baked bear
after this?
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MAN 2: Totally.
MAN 1: Awesome.
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SFX: Sirens
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MAN 2: It’s such a nice day today.
MAN 2: It’s such a nice day today.
SFX: Sirens
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SFX: Boat Horn
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SFX: Waves
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SAMMY: Get me to that boat!!
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CONNOR: On it!
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GUARD: Do not let them…
GUARD: OUT OF YOUR SIGHTS!!
SFX: Snap
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SFX: CRUNCH!
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SAMMY: Wa-Hoo!!
SAMMY: Wa-Hoo!!
SAMMY: Wa-Hoo!!
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SFX: Sirens
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SFX: Thud, Car horn
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SFX: Shattering
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SAMMY: *Gasp!*
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SAMMY: *Chuckle*
SAMMY: *Chuckle*
SAMMY: I’m safe…
SAMMY: …payload is too…
CONNOR (V.O.): Fantastic!
CONNOR (V.O.): Now lemme just take her down, nice and
easy…
CONNOR (V.O.): Now lemme just take her down, nice and
easy…
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SFX: BOOM!