Upgrade to Pro
— share decks privately, control downloads, hide ads and more …
Speaker Deck
Sign up for free
Menu
Search
Features
All features
Private URLs
Password Protection
Custom URLS
Scheduled publishing
Remove Branding
Restrict embedding
Deck Collections
Notes
Features
All features
Private URLs
Password Protection
Custom URLS
Scheduled publishing
Remove Branding
Restrict embedding
Deck Collections
Notes
Explore
Featured decks
Featured speakers
Programming
Technology
Storyboards
Explore
Featured decks
Featured speakers
Programming
Technology
Storyboards
Pricing
Search
Sign in
Sign up for free
What the Fuck
Search
Patricia Jurkowski
April 20, 2026
260
0
Share
Embed
Copy iframe code
Copy JS code
Copy link
Start on current slide
What the Fuck
Patricia Jurkowski
April 20, 2026
More Decks by Patricia Jurkowski
See All by Patricia Jurkowski
gideon the ninth - wake me up inside
pjurkowski
0
330
Your Mom Bucks
pjurkowski
0
400
Project 1 - Skelly and the Trashman
pjurkowski
0
10
Featured
See All Featured
Embracing the Ebb and Flow
colly
88
5.2k
Done Done
chrislema
187
17k
Sam Torres - BigQuery for SEOs
techseoconnect
PRO
0
570
Optimising Largest Contentful Paint
csswizardry
37
4k
Bash Introduction
62gerente
615
220k
The Power of CSS Pseudo Elements
geoffreycrofte
82
6.6k
VelocityConf: Rendering Performance Case Studies
addyosmani
331
25k
Are puppies a ranking factor?
jonoalderson
2
4k
Data-driven link building: lessons from a $708K investment (BrightonSEO talk)
szymonslowik
1
1.4k
Writing Fast Ruby
sferik
630
63k
The Curse of the Amulet
leimatthew05
3
15k
State of Search Keynote: SEO is Dead Long Live SEO
ryanjones
0
310
Transcript
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
Senior: Don't tell me you're still thinking about it.
Junior: what, you think I'm lying?
Junior: It is now day seven of that bird not
moving from that spot.
Junior: It is now day seven of that bird not
moving from that spot.
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
Boss: Hey guys... I think they know something...
Goon 1: Aint no way they know about all of
them-
Goon 1: Aint no way they know about all of
them-
None
None
Goon 2: Yeah, yeah! As long as they don't get
their hands on the tech, we're good, right?
None
Boss: You idiots shut the hell up,
Boss: Suspicion is a ticking bomb. The fact they're looking
is already bad.
Boss: Fucking unbeliev-
Boss: Ay where'd she go?
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
Junior: Wha-
Junior: Wha-
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
Senior: After you.
Junior: Huh?
Junior: Ugh. Okay.
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
Senior: Here, use these.
Junior: Gloves? Hell no! I didn't ask you to kill
it.
Senior: Its your hunch. Have some initiative.
Junior: No way!
Junior: What if I'm wrong and its just a bird?
None
None
None
None
Boss: What the FUCK
None
Goon 1: What, what??
Boss: They shot the camera down!
Boss: They shot the camera down! Goon 1: Are you
sure? That's extreme!
Boss: I KNOW calm down!
Boss: Let me switch to another.
Boss: Let me switch to another.
None
None
None
None
None
None
Boss: Well SHIT!!
Goon 1: Oh god
Goon 1: Oh God OH GOD I CANT GO TO
JAIL!
Goon 1: EXPLODE IT EXPLODE IT Boss: HEY-
Goon 1: Blow that thing up what are you waiting
for! Boss: Get the HELL off!
Boss: Get a HOLD of yourself!
Boss: Stop before you mess something up you imbecile!
Goon 1: You're too SLOW old man!
[grumble and struggle noises]
[grumble and struggle noises]
[grumble and struggle noises]
[grumble and struggle noises]
[grumble and struggle noises]
[grumble and struggle noises]
[grumble and struggle noises]
[grumble and struggle noises]
[grumble and struggle noises]
[grumble and struggle noises]
[grumble and struggle noises]
[grumble and struggle noises]
[grumble and struggle noises]
[grumble and struggle noises]
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
None
Boss: Look what you fucking did! I said you'd fuck
something up! Goon 1: If YOU hadn't knocked into ME-
Boss and Goon 1: [INCOHERENT SHOUTING]
Boss and Goon 1: [INCOHERENT SHOUTING]
Boss and Goon 1: [INCOHERENT SHOUTING]
Boss and Goon 1: [INCOHERENT SHOUTING]
Boss and Goon 1: [INCOHERENT SHOUTING] Goon 3: Its..
Boss and Goon 1: [INCOHERENT SHOUTING] Goon 3: ...everywhere...
Goon 3: ...OH GOD...I need air...
Goon 2: I NEED AIR I NEED AIR Boss: NO
NO! STOP! Goon 1: It's okay calm down!
Goon 2: IM SORRY! Goon 1: Calm down don't go
out there!
[muffled] Goon 2: ew ew ew ew ew ew ew
ew
[muffled] Goon 2: ew ew ew ew ew ew ew
ew
[muffled] Goon 2: ew ew ew ew ew ew ew
ew
Goon 2: Ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew
Goon 2: Ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew
Goon 2: EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW
Goon 1: You FUCKING idiot! You've fucked us!
Goon 2: Im sorry Im sorry! Goon 1: We're so
dead!
Goon 1: Why would you do that....
Boss: Don't ditch me you assholes!
None
None
None
None
None
None
Both: What the fuck??