Body Language and You

by Rohan Puri (@RohanSPuri)

Transcript

1. BODY LANGUAGE AND YOU YOUR GUIDE TO THE INTRO @RohanSPuri
2. Goal: Consciously start thinking about your body language in your everyday life.
3. THE RULES FIRST THINGS FIRST 1 2 3 Not an expert. You must learn to apply and test these on your own. Use these tools for good, not evil. All psychology must be understood in context
4. THE MAGIC NUMBER 93% Of what you convey to people comes through in body language and paralinguistic cues.
5. I’ll prove it to you.
6. A DIFFERENT MESSAGE?
7. A DIFFERENT MESSAGE?
9. THIS SHIT MATTERS.
10. THE INTRODUCTION That’s it. Impressions are far more difficult to change after this critical period in time. 10 seconds
11. THE INTRODUCTION •  Prepare your “hi” •  Smiles can be heard •  Be responsive (“mhm” and “right”) to keep engaged Phone Friendly and Responsive In-Person Friendly and Caring •  Smile (with your eyes!) •  Perfect the handshake •  Eye darting vs. blank stare Pro-Tip #1: If you’ve forgot someone’s name, introduce them to a friend and listen in.
12. FIRM (BUT MINDFUL) MEET THE WEBBING DARTING EYE CONTACT DELAYED SMILE GIVE THE UPPER HAND
14. ACTIVITY 1 For the good of mankind, please. PRACTICE!
15. 6 TECHNIQUES FOR DISCUSSION How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie (changed from Carnegey to get more attention) 1.  Be genuinely interested in people 2.  Smile! 3.  Remember that person’s name is to that person the sweetest sound in any language 4.  Encourage others to talk about themselves 5.  Talk in terms of the other person’s interests 6.  Sincerely make them feel important
16. Do you remember those 5 names?
17. SIGNS OF INTEREST & COMFORT Evaluating Rapport Which shows the highest degree of rapport? 1 2 3
18. SIGNS OF INTEREST & COMFORT Comfort in typically stressful situations conveys confidence. Take up more space, but not too much.
19. SIGNS OF INTEREST & COMFORT Pro Tip #2 – Observe mirrored body language on your own and learn to recognize it in your peers. Mirroring Head Tilt Eye Contact Open/Vulnerable BL
20. NEGATIVE BODY LANGUAGE Petting or negative preening occurs after something stressful has occurred.
21. NEGATIVE BODY LANGUAGE This is 100% indicative of dismissiveness and mental/moral superiority…BAD!
22. NEGATIVE BODY LANGUAGE How do people react to sudden bad news?
23. NEGATIVE BODY LANGUAGE Fight or Flight Freeze! (and curl up)
24.     Tom  Hanks  Drops  the  F-­‐Bomb     IN ACTION
25. Activity #2 – Cold E-mails! Hi Bill! Loved your presentation at the unconference yesterday – including the subtle allusion to your recent “watch hacking” blog post. I was hoping to drop by for 5 min with you and Steve to show you both our new smart-watch technology (www.smartsoft.com) backed by Google Ventures and now breaking records at Kickstarter. Seeing as you’ll be speaking with him on a panel for 2 hours at the event next week, I figured this could also give you something to talk about during those awkward silences! All jokes aside, thanks for coming out to these events; really shows that you still love to help out us early- entrepreneurs no matter our background. Let me know what you think and thanks for your help! Rohan Puri 1.  Eye-catching subject (keywords, namedrop, actionable) 2.  Greeting + Connection (previous meeting) •  No names! 3.  Ask – get to the point (keywords) 4.  Back up your ask with context 5.  Butter and appreciate the help 6.  (Bonus) Humor always helps. --- Don’t forget to follow up! --- The Outline
26. How to use these tools? Yes, it’s manipulative. Yes, people are already using it on you (marketers, pick pockets, salesmen, magicians). Yes, you should too. •  Call the person by name, then point AND look at the desired spot •  Walk, turn, lead. •  Direct in team presentations Direct Convince 1.  Start with a general agreeable statement 2.  The ask/request 3.  Give a reason
27. WHAT’S THE POINT? BE A BETTER YOU Start learning, be curious about “that friend,” and make a conscious effort to become a better person. People follow people more than they do ideas @RohanSPuri Why not focus on the people?
29. Obama: Democratic National Convention Obama’s Cadence and Gestures http://www.youtube.com/watch? feature=player_detailpage&v=AQENwD- QlRA#t=4354s
30. Bill Clinton’s DNC Speech Bill’s Charisma is Famous… http://www.youtube.com/watch? v=uzDhk3BHi6Q
31. Steve Jobs’ Speaking Style MacBook Air Unveiling http://www.youtube.com/watch? feature=player_detailpage&v=O4IQvHYoJTE#t =119s