Finding a balance (in the times of CoVid-19)

If there is one thing I have always struggled with, it’s finding a balance between being a full time software engineer and being an open source contributor & maintainer… and a human being. In this new status quo where most of us are going fully remote, this balance may be even harder to reach; what’d I’d like to share with you are a few macro- and a few micro-actionable concepts that helped me. And I hope they’ll help you, too.

Transcript

1. ⚖
   FINDING A BALANCE
   (in the times of CoVid-19)
   @kelset @FormidableLabs
   #esnextconf
   

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2. I AM
   2
   •Software Engineer @ Formidable (London)
   •React Native core maintainer
   •ProvidedAsIs (London) organiser
   @kelset @FormidableLabs
   #esnextconf
   Lorenzo Sciandra - @kelset
   

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3. – Fred & Drew from Pika
   “How do you see the JS/dev community 5 years from now?”
   3 @kelset @FormidableLabs
   #esnextconf
   

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4. 4
   KINDER
   @kelset @FormidableLabs
   #esnextconf
   

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5. CURRENT DEV SPACE
   5 @kelset @FormidableLabs
   #esnextconf
   

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6. CURRENT WORLD
   6 @kelset @FormidableLabs
   Couldn’t find the original authors for attribution, sorry
   #esnextconf
   

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7. FOCUS ON WHAT YOU CAN CONTROL
   7
   To be a better community
   We need to take care
   Of ourselves as individuals
   @kelset @FormidableLabs
   #esnextconf
   

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8. I AM
   8
   Open Source maintainer
   Experienced burnout 2 times (and a half)
   Been seeing a therapist for over 2 years
   Also: not an expert in mental health!
   This talk is highly subjective and you should reach out to a therapist if you feel that you are struggling.
   @kelset @FormidableLabs
   #esnextconf
   

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9. WHAT I WANT TO DO
   9
   3 Macro Concepts
   +
   3 Micro Actionables
   =
   ♥
   @kelset @FormidableLabs
   #esnextconf
   

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10. LET’S TALK
    MACRO CONCEPTS
    10 @kelset @FormidableLabs
    #esnextconf
    

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11. MACRO #1
    11
    “THE SOFTWARE IS PROVIDED "AS IS",
    WITHOUT WARRANTY OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED,
    INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO THE WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY, FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE AND NONINFRINGEMENT.”
    - the MIT license.
    And all the other ones.
    @kelset @FormidableLabs
    #esnextconf
    

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12. #1 PROVIDED AS IS
    12
    As a maintainer:
    You don’t owe anything to anyone. But respect your community.
    As a citizen:
    You are not entitled to any support. Be more proactive.
    Read more at: Open Source Maintainers Owe You Nothing
    @kelset @FormidableLabs
    #esnextconf
    

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13. MACRO #2
    13
    You are WORTH
    @kelset @FormidableLabs
    #esnextconf
    

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14. #2 CELEBRATE YOUR VICTORIES
    14
    Stop chasing the GitHub stars
    to feel that what you have done is good.
    @kelset @FormidableLabs
    #esnextconf
    Own your actions and be the first one to celebrate:
    

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15. MACRO #3
    15
    “We are more hurt
    by our own expectations
    of other people
    than by their actions”
    @kelset @FormidableLabs
    #esnextconf
    

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16. #3 SENSE OF SELF
    16
    A lot of issues in open source are caused by people “turning off” their
    sense of self.
    Try being more aware of your feelings and emotions,
    and try to understand where they are coming from.
    This is hard.
    Having a therapist helped me a lot with this.
    @kelset @FormidableLabs
    #esnextconf
    

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17. 17
    Some may be polarising takes, please be kind
    @kelset @FormidableLabs
    #esnextconf
    LET’S TALK
    MICRO ACTIONABLES
    

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18. MICRO #1
    18
    Remove (almost) all notifications
    @kelset @FormidableLabs
    #esnextconf
    

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19. #1 ALL THE NOTIFICATIONS
    19
    (that are just noise)
    No emails
    No push
    notifications
    Exceptions: Whatsapp, Telegram
    @kelset @FormidableLabs
    #esnextconf
    

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20. MICRO #2
    20
    Do open source in small bursts
    within hours of daily work (if you can)
    @kelset @FormidableLabs
    #esnextconf
    

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21. #2 SMALL BURSTS
    21
    Don't dedicate full hours (unless strictly necessary).
    Normalise to yourself that it’s actual work.
    (and you don’t do it on weekends!)
    Reduce the risk of “tunneling” because of the boundary.
    @kelset @FormidableLabs
    #esnextconf
    

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22. MICRO #3
    22
    Free time !== Open Source time
    @kelset @FormidableLabs
    #esnextconf
    

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23. #3 OUTSIDE CODING
    23
    Do Tai Chi in VR
    Watch Bojack Horseman
    Make your bedroom a phone-free zone
    Sleep at least 8 hrs per night
    Exercise
    Watch Matt D’Avella, Anna Akana,
    MPJ, Mayuko vids on YouTube Meditate
    Take a note of something that
    bothers you then set it on fire
    Take vitamines
    Get a pet
    Burn candles & incenses
    Play video games
    Learn something not CS-related
    @kelset @FormidableLabs
    #esnextconf
    

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24. TO SUM IT UP
    24 @kelset @FormidableLabs
    #esnextconf
    These are challenging times
    Take care of yourself
    A better you => a better community
    ♥
    

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25. MENTAL HEALTH RESOURCES
    25
    Please take care of yourself.
    If you are struggling, reach out to someone.
    US
    http://samhsa.gov/
    http://psychologytoday.com/
    UK
    https://www.gov.uk/government/collections/public-mental-health
    https://www.nhs.uk/oneyou/every-mind-matters/
    https://seizetheawkward.org/
    @kelset @FormidableLabs
    #esnextconf
    

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26. SEE YOU IN 5 YEARS!
    26
    #esconfnext
    Reach out!
    @kelset (open DMs)
    notkelset@kelset.dev
    Thanks to:
    Fred & Drew from Pika
    @FormidableLabs
    (hopefully sooner!)
    

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