You Are Insufficiently Persuasive

Why can't they see that you're right?

Lack of ability to resolve differences of opinion can transform happy, productive teams into morose cabals of dissidents.

This talk gets to the root of _why_ teams disagree and uses social science research (science!) to foment understanding among programmers.

You'll learn to resolve misunderstandings and negotiate common goals, and turn your shop into a place where everyone can do their best work.

Transcript

1. Oct 2017
   @sandimetz
   Sandi Metz
   You are
   insufficiently
   persuasive
   

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2. @sandimetz Oct 2017
   Happiness
   

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3. @sandimetz Oct 2017
   On the Unhappiness of Software Developers
   Daniel Graziotin, Fabian Fagerholm, Xiaofeng Wang, and Pekka Abrahamsson. 2017
   

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4. @sandimetz Oct 2017
   On the Unhappiness of Software Developers
   Daniel Graziotin, Fabian Fagerholm, Xiaofeng Wang, and Pekka Abrahamsson. 2017
   456,283 email addresses
   

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5. @sandimetz Oct 2017
   On the Unhappiness of Software Developers
   Daniel Graziotin, Fabian Fagerholm, Xiaofeng Wang, and Pekka Abrahamsson. 2017
   456,283
   33,200
   email addresses
   randomly selected
   

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6. @sandimetz Oct 2017
   On the Unhappiness of Software Developers
   Daniel Graziotin, Fabian Fagerholm, Xiaofeng Wang, and Pekka Abrahamsson. 2017
   456,283
   33,200
   1,318
   email addresses
   randomly selected
   responded
   

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7. @sandimetz Oct 2017
   On the Unhappiness of Software Developers
   Daniel Graziotin, Fabian Fagerholm, Xiaofeng Wang, and Pekka Abrahamsson. 2017
   456,283
   33,200
   1,318
   219
   email addresses
   randomly selected
   responded
   unhappiness codes
   

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8. @sandimetz Oct 2017
   On the Unhappiness of Software Developers
   Daniel Graziotin, Fabian Fagerholm, Xiaofeng Wang, and Pekka Abrahamsson. 2017
   456,283
   33,200
   1,318
   219
   2,280
   email addresses
   randomly selected
   responded
   unhappiness codes
   references to codes
   

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9. @sandimetz Oct 2017
   On the Unhappiness of Software Developers
   Daniel Graziotin, Fabian Fagerholm, Xiaofeng Wang, and Pekka Abrahamsson. 2017
   456,283
   33,200
   1,318
   219
   2,280
   10.41
   email addresses
   randomly selected
   responded
   unhappiness codes
   references to codes
   average references per code
   

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10. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    On the Unhappiness of Software Developers
    Daniel Graziotin, Fabian Fagerholm, Xiaofeng Wang, and Pekka Abrahamsson. 2017
    Frequency Cause Category
    1 186 Being stuck in problem solving internal
    2 152 Time pressure external
    3 107 Bad code quality and coding practice external
    4 71 Under-performing colleague external
    5 63 Feel inadequate with work internal
    6 60 Mundane or repetitive task external
    7 57 Unexplained broken code external
    8 42 Bad decision making external
    9 40 Imposed limitation on development external
    10 39 Personal issues – not work related internal
    817 out of 2,280
    

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11. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    On the Unhappiness of Software Developers
    Daniel Graziotin, Fabian Fagerholm, Xiaofeng Wang, and Pekka Abrahamsson. 2017
    Frequency Cause Category
    1 186 Being stuck in problem solving internal
    2 152 Time pressure external
    3 107 Bad code quality and coding practice external
    4 71 Under-performing colleague external
    5 63 Feel inadequate with work internal
    6 60 Mundane or repetitive task external
    7 57 Unexplained broken code external
    8 42 Bad decision making external
    9 40 Imposed limitation on development external
    10 39 Personal issues – not work related internal
    817 out of 2,280
    

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12. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    On the Unhappiness of Software Developers
    Daniel Graziotin, Fabian Fagerholm, Xiaofeng Wang, and Pekka Abrahamsson. 2017
    Frequency Cause Category
    1
    2 152 Time pressure external
    3 107 Bad code quality and coding practice external
    4 71 Under-performing colleague external
    5
    6 60 Mundane or repetitive task external
    7 57 Unexplained broken code external
    8 42 Bad decision making external
    9 40 Imposed limitation on development external
    10
    528 out of 2,280
    

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13. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    On the Unhappiness of Software Developers
    Daniel Graziotin, Fabian Fagerholm, Xiaofeng Wang, and Pekka Abrahamsson. 2017
    Frequency Cause Category
    1
    2 152 Time pressure external
    3 107 Bad code quality and coding practice external
    4 71 Under-performing colleague external
    5
    6 60 Mundane or repetitive task external
    7 57 Unexplained broken code external
    8 42 Bad decision making external
    9 40 Imposed limitation on development external
    10
    528 out of 2,280
    

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14. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    On the Unhappiness of Software Developers
    Daniel Graziotin, Fabian Fagerholm, Xiaofeng Wang, and Pekka Abrahamsson. 2017
    Frequency Cause Category
    1
    2 152 Time pressure external
    3 107 Bad code quality and coding practice external
    4 71 Under-performing colleague external
    5
    6
    7 57 Unexplained broken code external
    8 42 Bad decision making external
    9 40 Imposed limitation on development external
    10
    469 out of 2,280
    

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15. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    On the Unhappiness of Software Developers
    Daniel Graziotin, Fabian Fagerholm, Xiaofeng Wang, and Pekka Abrahamsson. 2017
    Frequency Cause Category
    1
    2 152 Time pressure external
    3 107 Bad code quality and coding practice external
    4 71 Under-performing colleague external
    5
    6
    7 57 Unexplained broken code external
    8 42 Bad decision making external
    9 40 Imposed limitation on development external
    10
    469 out of 2,280
    The problem?
    

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16. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    On the Unhappiness of Software Developers
    Daniel Graziotin, Fabian Fagerholm, Xiaofeng Wang, and Pekka Abrahamsson. 2017
    Frequency Cause Category
    1
    2 152 Time pressure external
    3 107 Bad code quality and coding practice external
    4 71 Under-performing colleague external
    5
    6
    7 57 Unexplained broken code external
    8 42 Bad decision making external
    9 40 Imposed limitation on development external
    10
    469 out of 2,280
    The problem?
    Other People!
    

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17. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Persuasion
    

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18. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    One perspective
    

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19. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    

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20. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    

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21. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    6 Rules
    

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22. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Reciprocity
    1
    

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23. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    "Hare Krishnas in the Carnival Parade,2009" by Capes Treasures CC BY-NC-ND 2.0
    

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24. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Consistency
    2
    

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25. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    "Opening Presents" by Jay Malone CC BY 2.0
    

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26. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Social Proof
    3
    

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27. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    "Six Sheep Staring" by Aad Van Rijn CC BY-NC-ND 2.0
    

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28. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Authority
    4
    

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29. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    "Paggi-9" by Jay Weenig CC BY-NC 2.0
    

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30. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Liking
    5
    

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31. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    "Friends" by Julien Harneis CC BY-SA 2.0
    

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32. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Scarcity
    6
    

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33. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    "Parking Lot" by Jim Pennucci CC BY 2.0
    

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34. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Reciprocity
    Consistency
    Social Proof
    Authority
    Liking
    Scarcity
    

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35. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Reciprocity
    Consistency
    Social Proof
    Authority
    Liking
    Scarcity
    Weapons of Influence
    

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36. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Another Perspective
    

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37. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    

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38. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    

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39. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    4 Categories
    

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40. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Make People
    Like You
    1
    

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41. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Become genuinely interested
    in other people.
    Make People Like You
    1.1
    

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42. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Smile.
    Make People Like You
    1.2
    

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43. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Remember that
    a person’s name is to that person
    the sweetest and most
    important sound in any language
    .
    Make People Like You
    1.3
    

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44. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Be a good listener.
    Make People Like You
    1.4
    

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45. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Talk in terms of
    the other person’s interests.
    Make People Like You
    1.5
    

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46. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Make the other person
    feel important
    —and do it sincerely.
    Make People Like You
    1.6
    

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47. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Handling People
    2
    

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48. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Don’t criticize,
    condemn or
    complain.
    2.1 Handling People
    

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49. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Give honest and sincere
    appreciation.
    Handling People
    2.2
    

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50. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Arouse in the other person
    an eager want.
    Handling People
    2.3
    

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51. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Win People
    To Your Way
    Of Thinking
    3
    

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52. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    The only way
    to get the best of an argument
    is to avoid it.
    3.1 Win People
    

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53. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Show respect for the other
    person’s opinions.
    (Never say, “You’re wrong.”)
    3.2 Win People
    

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54. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    If you are wrong,
    admit it quickly and
    emphatically.
    3.3 Win People
    

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55. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Begin in a friendly way.
    3.4 Win People
    

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56. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Get the other person saying
    “yes, yes”
    immediately.
    3.5 Win People
    

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57. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Let the other person
    do a great deal
    of the talking.
    3.6 Win People
    

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58. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Let the other person
    feel that the idea is theirs.
    3.7 Win People
    

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59. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Try honestly to see things
    from the other person’s
    point of view.
    3.8 Win People
    

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60. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Be sympathetic
    with the other person’s
    ideas and desires.
    3.9 Win People
    

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61. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Appeal to the nobler motives.
    3.10 Win People
    

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62. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Dramatize your ideas.
    3.11 Win People
    

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63. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Throw down a challenge.
    3.12 Win People
    

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64. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Be A Leader
    4
    

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65. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Begin with praise
    and honest appreciation.
    4.1 Be A Leader
    

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66. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Call attention to
    people’s mistakes
    indirectly.
    Be A Leader
    4.2
    

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67. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Talk about
    your own mistakes
    before criticizing
    the other person.
    4.3 Be A Leader
    

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68. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Ask questions
    instead of
    giving direct orders.
    4.4 Be A Leader
    

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69. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Let the other person
    save face.
    4.5 Be A Leader
    

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70. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Praise
    the slightest improvement.
    4.6 Be A Leader
    

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71. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Give the other person
    a fine reputation
    to live up to.
    4.7 Be A Leader
    

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72. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Use encouragement.
    4.8 Be A Leader
    

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73. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Make the other person
    happy
    about doing the thing
    you suggest.
    4.9 Be A Leader
    

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74. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    

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75. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Act as if others are
    interesting
    and
    you will eventually
    find them so.
    

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76. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Act as if others are
    interesting
    and
    you will eventually
    find them so. - Sarah Mei
    

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77. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    It's not about them.
    

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78. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    It's about you.
    

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79. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Make People Like You
    Handle People Respectfully
    Win People Over
    Be A Leader
    

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80. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Having Things
    Your Way
    

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81. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Frequency Cause Category
    152 Time pressure external
    107 Bad code quality and coding practice external
    71 Under-performing colleague external
    57 Unexplained broken code external
    42 Bad decision making external
    40 Imposed limitation on development external
    

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82. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Frequency Cause Category
    152 Time pressure external
    107 Bad code quality and coding practice external
    71 Under-performing colleague external
    57 Unexplained broken code external
    42 Bad decision making external
    40 Imposed limitation on development external
    People
    

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83. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Frequency Cause Category
    152 Time pressure external
    107 Bad code quality and coding practice external
    71 Under-performing colleague external
    57 Unexplained broken code external
    42 Bad decision making external
    40 Imposed limitation on development external
    People
    

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84. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Frequency Cause Category
    152 Time pressure external
    107 Bad code quality and coding practice external
    71 Under-performing colleague external
    57 Unexplained broken code external
    42 Bad decision making external
    40 Imposed limitation on development external
    People
    

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85. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    How do you know
    you're right?
    

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86. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Ends
    vs
    Means
    

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87. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Motivation
    

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88. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    

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89. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    

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90. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Autonomy
    

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91. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Autonomy
    Mastery
    

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92. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Autonomy
    Mastery
    Purpose
    

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93. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Teamwork
    

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94. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    

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95. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Project Aristotle
    

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96. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Project Aristotle
    

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97. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    Emotional Intelligence
    of
    Groups
    

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98. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    "equality in distribution of
    conversational turn-taking"
    

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99. @sandimetz Oct 2017
    "average social sensitivity"
    

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100. @sandimetz Oct 2017
     Psychological
     Safety
     

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101. @sandimetz Oct 2017
     You Are
     

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102. @sandimetz Oct 2017
     You Are
     

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103. @sandimetz Oct 2017
     You Are
     Good
     Enough
     

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104. @sandimetz Oct 2017
     Collaborate
     

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105. @sandimetz Oct 2017
     Be Your Best Self
     

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106. @sandimetz
     Thanks
     Oct 2017
     

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107. @sandimetz
     References
     Oct 2017
     https://motherboard.vice.com/en_us/article/53vb4z/are-software-developers-miserable
     https://arxiv.org/pdf/1703.04993.pdf
     http://changingminds.org/
     https://www.influenceatwork.com/principles-of-persuasion/
     http://www.dalecarnegie.ca/
     https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2011/02/science-people-really-do-take-longer-leaving-a-
     parking-spot-when-youre-waiting-for-it/71439/
     http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1559-1816.1997.tb00661.x/abstract
     https://www.nytimes.com/2016/02/28/magazine/what-google-learned-from-its-quest-to-build-the-perfect-
     team.html
     https://rework.withgoogle.com/subjects/teams/
     https://hbr.org/product/harvard-business-review-january-february-2016/BR1601-MAG-ENG
     

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108. @sandimetz
     http://poodr.com
     Oct 2017
     

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109. @sandimetz
     http://99bottlesbook.com
     Oct 2017
     

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110. @sandimetz
     Sandi Metz
     @sandimetz
     http://sandimetz.com
     Oct 2017
     

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