Cultural Red Pills and Blue Pills

@talraviv talraviv.org Cultural Red Pills and Blue Pills

@talraviv talraviv.org Here’s a way I see people personalities

@talraviv talraviv.org Pardon the analogy,

@talraviv talraviv.org Pardon the analogy, I can’t think of a
better one

@talraviv talraviv.org

@talraviv talraviv.org There’s two sides

@talraviv talraviv.org Fine, it’s more of a spectrum

@talraviv talraviv.org I don’t have a word for it. It’s
groupings of behaviors.

@talraviv talraviv.org I’ve met people everywhere along it.

@talraviv talraviv.org In every culture, ethnicity, nationality, you’ll find people
everywhere on this spectrum.

@talraviv talraviv.org so here are my clusters

@talraviv talraviv.org in terms of what a video camera could
capture

@talraviv talraviv.org okayyyyy

@talraviv talraviv.org okayyyyy not entirelyyyy objective

@talraviv talraviv.org okayyyyy not entirelyyyy objective but going ahead anyways

@talraviv talraviv.org Indirect

@talraviv talraviv.org Direct

@talraviv talraviv.org Niceties

@talraviv talraviv.org Down to business

@talraviv talraviv.org Careful not to offend

@talraviv talraviv.org No filter

@talraviv talraviv.org Calm

@talraviv talraviv.org Passionate

@talraviv talraviv.org Serious

@talraviv talraviv.org Belly laughs

@talraviv talraviv.org Avoid confrontation

@talraviv talraviv.org Debates often

@talraviv talraviv.org Space

@talraviv talraviv.org Affectionate

@talraviv talraviv.org Respect rules

@talraviv talraviv.org Improvisation

@talraviv talraviv.org Respect authority in the open

@talraviv talraviv.org Openly question authority

@talraviv talraviv.org Seek permission

@talraviv talraviv.org Take initiative

@talraviv talraviv.org Important not to step on toes

@talraviv talraviv.org Important to assert

@talraviv talraviv.org “That’s interesting”

@talraviv talraviv.org “Nah”

@talraviv talraviv.org Focus on agreement

@talraviv talraviv.org Focus on differences

@talraviv talraviv.org Start by apologizing but not deeply

@talraviv talraviv.org Start by confronting but not deeply

@talraviv talraviv.org Ask how you’re doing as small talk

@talraviv talraviv.org Don’t ask how you’re doing unless they deeply
care

@talraviv talraviv.org Important to be agreeable

@talraviv talraviv.org Important to be candid

@talraviv talraviv.org Hard to recover from arguing

@talraviv talraviv.org Quick to recover from arguing

@talraviv talraviv.org As you read that, I bet some people
came to your mind.

came to your mind. Maybe some regions.

came to your mind. Maybe some regions. Maybe some groups

@talraviv talraviv.org I’ve learned this is everywhere

@talraviv talraviv.org NASA Blue Marble series ﬂickr.com/photos/gsfc

@talraviv talraviv.org Here’s one example

@talraviv talraviv.org Here’s one example from a movie that set
the record for highest grossing romantic comedy of all time

@talraviv talraviv.org Text My Big Fat Greek Wedding, 2002

@talraviv talraviv.org Text Text My Big Fat Greek Wedding, 2002

@talraviv talraviv.org Think about regions of the United States you’re
familiar with

@talraviv talraviv.org Think about places you’ve traveled …and misunderstandings you’ve
had

@talraviv talraviv.org Think about ethnicities outside your own that you
gravitate towards …or have trouble connecting with.

@talraviv talraviv.org This spectrum matters a lot.

@talraviv talraviv.org This spectrum matters a lot. And it’s a
source of a lot of misunderstanding, stress, and friction.

@talraviv talraviv.org The more global the environment,

@talraviv talraviv.org The more global the environment, the more cultures,

the more diverse the mix

the more diverse the mix the more I see this as a source of interpersonal friction

@talraviv talraviv.org Because

@talraviv talraviv.org heres how people view each other

@talraviv talraviv.org Insensitive

@talraviv talraviv.org Childish

@talraviv talraviv.org Impulsive

@talraviv talraviv.org Wild

@talraviv talraviv.org Hide their feelings

@talraviv talraviv.org Hypocritical

@talraviv talraviv.org Patronizing

@talraviv talraviv.org Rigid

@talraviv talraviv.org heres the deal though

@talraviv talraviv.org its actually a range

@talraviv talraviv.org Any given person could be anywhere on this
spectrum

@talraviv talraviv.org But to be more accurate

@talraviv talraviv.org Everyone is more of a range {

@talraviv talraviv.org Meaning, if you felt that the descriptors weren’t
mutually exclusive - you’re right. {

@talraviv talraviv.org You might be great knowing when to be
here {

@talraviv talraviv.org You might be great knowing when to be
here and when to be here {

@talraviv talraviv.org {

@talraviv talraviv.org You may be here with your close friends
& family {

@talraviv talraviv.org And here at work {

@talraviv talraviv.org you may be here when the system works
in your favor {

@talraviv talraviv.org and here when you need to rely on
yourself {

@talraviv talraviv.org I am here when I’m at work in
San Francisco {

@talraviv talraviv.org and I hop over here with professional contacts
in Israel {

@talraviv talraviv.org message 1 just be aware

@talraviv talraviv.org I don’t have much to say other than

@talraviv talraviv.org know this spectrum exists

@talraviv talraviv.org know that if you think you’re better

@talraviv talraviv.org someone is also pretty sure they’re better than
you

@talraviv talraviv.org and we’re all humans

@talraviv talraviv.org I’m saying this as much for myself

@talraviv talraviv.org Before I started this deck, this was originally
a pretty judgmental dichotomy in my mind

@talraviv talraviv.org I grew up on the east coast in
an Israeli family

@talraviv talraviv.org In college I laughed the most with Arab
classmates

@talraviv talraviv.org in San Francisco I room with Europeans

@talraviv talraviv.org And while I expanded my range at work

@talraviv talraviv.org And learned to say things like “Yes, AND”

@talraviv talraviv.org I generally connect better with immigrants

@talraviv talraviv.org (even if they make fun of me for
code switching)

@talraviv talraviv.org so it’s easy for me

@talraviv talraviv.org so it’s easy for me to pick a
side of the spectrum as “better”

@talraviv talraviv.org but, damn it, we’re all people

@talraviv talraviv.org but, damn it, we’re all people so I
can’t be that lazy

@talraviv talraviv.org and I know what it’s like to be
frustrated in the other direction

@talraviv talraviv.org I’m suuuuuper tempted to judge.

@talraviv talraviv.org I’m suuuuuper tempted to judge. And realized, sigh,
I can’t.

@talraviv talraviv.org Even my red pill/blue pill analogy is judgmental.

Red pill implies “real” or better

Red pill implies “real” or better But come on, do I really think one side is more human or better or real, and I’m the one to know that?

Red pill implies “real” or better But come on, do I really think one side is more human or better or real, and I’m the one to know that? Damn it, life would be so much easier without duality and subtlety.

@talraviv talraviv.org message 2 widen your range

@talraviv talraviv.org whatever your comfort zone {

@talraviv talraviv.org the wider your range {

@talraviv talraviv.org the more situations you can handle {

@talraviv talraviv.org the more people you can connect with {

@talraviv talraviv.org If people here could move a little right
{

@talraviv talraviv.org They may get more effective in some situations
{

@talraviv talraviv.org If people here could expand a little left
{

@talraviv talraviv.org They might improve their lives without giving too
much up {

@talraviv talraviv.org It took me a while to learn

@talraviv talraviv.org When I worked in Israel I played the
wrong side of the spectrum at the wrong time

@talraviv talraviv.org To think of it, that definitely happened at
work in San Francisco

@talraviv talraviv.org Over time I’ve learned the art of playing
my range at the right times

@talraviv talraviv.org • I ask blunt questions • I call
bullshit • I invite disagreement …AND get along after

@talraviv talraviv.org I can take a deep breath and write
non-confrontational (yet effective) fluff like this

@talraviv talraviv.org (Sometimes I write on behalf of my Israeli
friends or family to help them when responding to Americans)

@talraviv talraviv.org I told my team once, I learned the
secret to communication at work is learning to replace “whoa whoa whoa whoa wtfffffff”

@talraviv talraviv.org I told my team once, I learned the
secret to communication at work is learning to replace “whoa whoa whoa whoa wtfffffff” with “that’s awesome! we should talk”

@talraviv talraviv.org so thats it

@talraviv talraviv.org know this is a thing

@talraviv talraviv.org stretch your range

@talraviv talraviv.org look for this at work

@talraviv talraviv.org look for this in your neighborhood

@talraviv talraviv.org push yourself to deal with different styles

@talraviv talraviv.org push yourself to deal with different styles talking
to myself here…

@talraviv talraviv.org have more patience for each other

@talraviv talraviv.org have more patience for each other talking to
myself here…

@talraviv talraviv.org and keep the spectrum in mind

@talraviv talraviv.org now

@talraviv talraviv.org this is the part

@talraviv talraviv.org where i ask you

@talraviv talraviv.org to subscribe to my mailing list

@talraviv talraviv.org but its late

@talraviv talraviv.org and i dont have a clever tie in

@talraviv talraviv.org so

@talraviv talraviv.org just subscribe

@talraviv talraviv.org its great

@talraviv talraviv.org people love it

@talraviv talraviv.org if you got this far

@talraviv talraviv.org you will too

@talraviv talraviv.org add your email here

@talraviv talraviv.org talraviv.org

@talraviv talraviv.org oh look

@talraviv talraviv.org second wind

@talraviv talraviv.org just kidding;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

@talraviv talraviv.org talraviv.org

Cultural Red Pills and Blue Pills

Cultural Red Pills and Blue Pills

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