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The Cube Rule of Food Identification

André Arko
April 20, 2018

The Cube Rule of Food Identification

On the internet, a fierce debate rages. Are hot dogs sandwiches? Are Pop-Tarts ravioli? Is sushi toast? Into the fracas steps @phosphatide with their brilliant Cube Rule of Food. The idea is that you can fit all food into one of seven categories based on where the starch in a dish is positioned. — kottke.org

André Arko

April 20, 2018


  1. The Cube Rule of Food Identification

  2. first, we asked: are hot dogs sandwiches?

  3. None
  4. New York said yes.

  5. first, hot dogs

  6. then,

  7. the wars began

  8. The Sandwich Alignment Chart tried to bring order

  9. None
  10. but only chaos ensued

  11. then spake the holy prophet @Phosphatide

  12. blessing us with the grand unified theory of food identification

  13. The Cube Rule

  14. None
  15. ᶃ Toast

  16. ᶃ Toast popular examples pizza nigiri sushi pumkin pie (slice)

  17. ᶄ Sandwich

  18. popular examples lasagna toast (made and photographed by me, Ryan.

    It was okay) (multi-decker type) quesadilla (non-folded) ᶄ Sandwich
  19. ᶅ Taco

  20. ᶅ Taco popular examples hot dog sub sandwich (uncut) slice

    of pie (taco on its side)
  21. ᶆ Sushi

  22. ᶆ Sushi popular examples falafel wrap enchilada pigs in a

  23. ᶇ Quiche

  24. ᶇ Quiche popular examples soup cheesecake falafel pita (in a

    bread bowl)
  25. salad deep-dish pizza key lime pie (in a bread bowl)

    ᶇ Quiche bonus round
  26. ᶈ Calzone

  27. ᶈ Calzone popular examples burrito corn dog pie (whole)

  28. dumplings pop-tarts uncrustables (unbitten) ᶈ Calzone bonus round

  29. Additional Cube Rulings

  30. † Salad

  31. soup fried rice spaghetti (a wet salad) popular examples †

  32. Muffins type ᶃ, toast or any other block of starch

    (raw, unsliced)
  33. Rice You are free to interpret the nature of rice

    however you wish.
  34. Vanilla Soy Latte A three-bean soup.

  35. Thank you.

  36. References • https://twitter.com/kadybat/status/883516550216507392 • https://twitter.com/matttomic/status/859117370455060481 • https://twitter.com/Phosphatide/status/974067376894328833