Your Emotional API: How to be a better developer by being a better human

Imagine we have an API endpoint which, when called, makes us feel angry. Imagine also that there are thousands of aliases that redirect to it. People and situations can call those endpoints at any time. It’s up to us to decide what response to send.

Feelings are messy and uncomfortable, why don’t we just ignore them? Because ignoring them inhibits our ability to code. Increases in emotional mastery can have impacts on our productivity and even careers.

We talk theory and practice for healthy emotions, with code samples!

Transcript

1. Your Emotional API How to be a better developer by being a better human
2. @emotionalAPI John Sawers Founder and CTO of Data Simply Architect at Privia Health @emotionalapi @johnksawers http://emotionalapi.com
3. “Emotions just make so much sense to me” — No One Ever
4. @emotionalAPI Cry Make a Scene Throw a Fit Whine Yell Don’t
5. @emotionalAPI Do 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8.
6. @emotionalAPI post '/feels/anger' do
 ...
 end
 post '/feels/sadness' do
 ...
 end
 post '/feels/fear' do
 ...
 end
 post '/feels/shame' do
 ...
 end
 post '/feels/joy' do
 ...
 end
 post '/feels/love' do
 ...
 end
 Endpoints
7. @emotionalAPI There’s another layer delete '/job/12', 301: '/feels/sadness'
 put '/events/mother/visit', 301: '/feels/anger'
 put '/baby/new', 301: '/feels/fear'
 post '/people/co-worker/comments/jerk', 301: '/feels/anger'
 get '/people/boss/compliment', 301: '/feels/pride
8. @emotionalAPI There’s another layer delete '/job/:id'
 100.times do
 Thread.new(post('/feels/fear')
 end
 20.times do
 Thread.new(post('/feels/sadness')
 end
 end
9. @emotionalAPI It’s A Public API The Bad News
10. @emotionalAPI You Control The Implementation The Good News
11. @emotionalAPI How Your Feeling Server Works Version: HTTP/1.0 Content-Type: application/feels Content-Length: ∞ Timeout: 7200 (hint: not very well)
12. When The Big Feels Hit @emotionalAPI
13. @emotionalAPI 20 Minutes
14. @emotionalAPI 1. 20 Minutes Max 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. System Properties
15. You can control where and when you express your feelings (But you don’t have to)
16. @emotionalAPI get('/feels/anger').perform_later
17. @emotionalAPI 1. 20 Minutes 2. Delayed Jobs 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. System Properties
18. Why Bother? That sounds really messy
19. Better Human?
20. @emotionalAPI Cognitive Problems
21. @emotionalAPI Cognitive Problems Poorer Executive Function [1]
22. @emotionalAPI Cognitive Problems Poorer Short Term Memory [2]
23. @emotionalAPI Cognitive Problems Lower ability to handle stress and cope with crisis [3]
24. @emotionalAPI Cognitive Problems More self-centered [4]
25. @emotionalAPI Cognitive Benefits
26. @emotionalAPI Cognitive Benefits “not just in improved behavior but in measurable academic achievement.”[5]
27. @emotionalAPI Cognitive Benefits “…process information more abstractly, integrating information to extract the gist, detecting patterns and relationships”[6]
28. @emotionalAPI Cognitive Benefits “…judged emotional expression more accurately”[7]
29. @emotionalAPI Express your ideas better Social Benefits
30. @emotionalAPI Better career advancement[8] Social Benefits
31. @emotionalAPI Empathy! Social Benefits
32. @emotionalAPI Help others with their emotional challenges Social Benefits
33. @emotionalAPI Health Benefits “measurable health advantage”[9]
34. Better Developer?
35. @emotionalAPI Code Reviews
36. @emotionalAPI Degraded Cognition
37. @emotionalAPI Distraction
38. @emotionalAPI Problematic Teammates
39. @emotionalAPI Impostor Syndrome
40. @emotionalAPI Interviewed, Hired, Fired
41. @emotionalAPI Manage & Mentor
42. http://frontside.io/ Senior Software Developer
43. More Details
44. @emotionalAPI 1. 20 Minutes Max 2. Delayed Jobs 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. System Properties
45. @emotionalAPI They Don’t Mean Anything
46. @emotionalAPI You’re Human
47. @emotionalAPI Fear of Loss of Control
48. @emotionalAPI Fear of Loss of Control A constructive way to express anger?
49. @emotionalAPI Fear of Loss of Control A constructive way to express anger? No such thing?
50. @emotionalAPI It’s Just Energy
51. @emotionalAPI It’s Just Energy Dancing Singing Exercise
52. @emotionalAPI Practice Talking
53. “…consciously recognizing the emotions reduced their impact.” David Rock Your Brain At Work[10]
54. @emotionalAPI
55. @emotionalAPI
56. @emotionalAPI “I feel” vs. “I am”
57. @emotionalAPI There’s no such thing as how you ‘really feel’
58. @emotionalAPI It’s Enumerable, not Boolean how_you_really_feel = [<Feeling#…>,…]
59. @emotionalAPI There Is No Should
60. “Trying not to feel something doesn’t work, and in some cases even backfires” David Rock Your Brain At Work[11]
61. @emotionalAPI 1. 20 Minutes 2. Delayed Jobs 3. It Doesn’t Mean Anything 4. You Won’t Lose Control 5. It’s Just Energy 6. Talking Makes It Better 7. All Feelings Are Valid 8. There Is Nothing You Should Be Feeling 9. Repression Doesn’t work System Properties
62. @emotionalAPI Do •GET /feels/anger/meaning, response: nil •self.body(:move) •@confidant.send_message(“I feel so sad about…”) •@self.send_message(“I feel so hurt about…”)
63. @emotionalAPI How did I get here? “…an intensive 20-hr Weekend Retreat in which you will explore your erroneous belief systems, learn to appropriately express emotions in a manner that heals…” Purpose • Passion • Peace http://aliceamos.me/p3retreat/
64. A Journey Through Anger
65. @emotionalAPI
66. @emotionalAPI GET '/events/something/trivial' ⬇ POST ‘/feels/anger'
67. @emotionalAPI Do
68. @emotionalAPI Safe Space
69. @emotionalAPI Throw A Fit
70. @emotionalAPI Do: •GET /feels/anger/meaning, response: nil •self.body(:move) •@confidant.send_message(“I feel so sad about…”) •@self.send_message(“I feel so hurt about…”) •SafeSpace.new(throw Fit.new(“ARRRGH”))
71. A Journey Through Sadness
72. @emotionalAPI delete ‘/v5/parents/marriage’
 
 post ‘/v6/parents/:dad_id/set_emotional_distance/100’
 
 post ‘/v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer’
 
 delete ‘/v17/parents/:dad_id’
73. @emotionalAPI /v5 delete ‘/v5/parents/marriage’ do
 20.times.do {
 Thread.new(get('/feels/fear'))
 Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness'))
 Thread.new(get('/feels/blame'))
 }
 delete('/feels/self_worth')
 end
74. @emotionalAPI /v8 post /v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer do
 20.times.do {
 Thread.new(delete('/v5/parents/marriage'))
 Thread.new(get('/feels/fear'))
 Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness'))
 }
 end
75. @emotionalAPI /v17 def ‘/v17/parents/:dad_id’ do
 1000.times.do {
 Thread.new(post('/v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer'))
 Thread.new(delete('/v5/parents/marriage'))
 Thread.new(get('/feels/anger'))
 Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness'))
 }
 end
76. @emotionalAPI Daddy Issues
77. @emotionalAPI Stack Trace NoMethodError - undefined method `paternal_approval’ for BossClass: /me/feels/panic.rb:9:in `initialize' /me/feels/love/daddy:14:in `none_for_you’ /me/feels/fear/mistake/guaranteed_to_be_fired:21:in `realize_mistake’ /me/events/releases/prod/bug_count/metrics.rb:39:in `count_bugs’
78. @emotionalAPI Stack Trace NoMethodError - undefined method `paternal_approval’ for BossClass: /me/feels/panic.rb:9:in `initialize' /me/feels/love/daddy:14:in `none_for_you’ /me/feels/fear/mistake/guaranteed_to_be_fired:21:in `realize_mistake’ /me/events/releases/prod/bug_count/metrics.rb:39:in `count_bugs’
79. Cry
80. “Crying doesn’t indicate you are weak, since birth it has always been a sign to indicate you are alive” — attributed to Charlotte Brontë
81. @emotionalAPI /v17 def ‘/v17/parents/:dad_id’ do
 1000.times.do {
 Thread.new(post('/v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer'))
 Thread.new(delete('/v5/parents/marriage'))
 Thread.new(get('/feels/anger'))
 Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness'))
 }
 end
82. @emotionalAPI Diff def ‘/v17/parents/:dad_id’ do
 1000.times.do { 500.times.do {
 Thread.new(post('/v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer'))
 Thread.new(delete('/v5/parents/marriage'))
 Thread.new(get('/feels/anger'))
 Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness'))
 }
 end
83. @emotionalAPI Diff get ‘/me/events/releases/prod/bugs/count_high’ do
 Thread.new(get('/feels/unloved'))
 Thread.new(get('/feels/panic'))
 puts 'oops'
 fix_it
 move_on
 end
84. @emotionalAPI Another Method post ‘/me/events/message/something_important_to_talk_about’ do
 
 end
85. @emotionalAPI Another Method post ‘/me/events/message/something_important_to_talk_about’ do
 self.set_state(:fear)
 origin = self.feels[:fear].inspect_origin || self.feels[:fear].perform_now
 
 end
86. The Five Whys https://open.buffer.com/5-whys-process/
87. @emotionalAPI Another Method post ‘/me/events/message/something_important_to_talk_about’ do
 self.set_state(:fear)
 origin = self.feels[:fear].inspect_origin || self.feels[:fear].perform_now
 self.clear_history(origin)
 self.set_time(Time.now)
 reappraise_situation(:current)
 end
88. @emotionalAPI Baggage
89. @emotionalAPI Emotional Mentorship You can do this work on your own But it’s more powerful and rewarding to do it with others.
90. @emotionalAPI Open Sourcing Mental Illness is a campaign founded by Ed Finkler to change how we deal with mental health in the tech community. https://osmihelp.org/ @OSMIhelp
91. @emotionalAPI Self Awareness (Monitoring)
92. @emotionalAPI Do: •GET /feels/anger/meaning, response: nil •self.body(:move) •@confidant.send_message(“I feel so sad about…”) •@self.send_message(“I feel so hurt about…”) •SafeSpace.new(throw Fit.new(“ARRRGGH”) •SafeSpace.new(:cry) •Service start nagios •Week.days.each(:practice) •config.treads = false •self.get_help(:therapist_service)
93. @emotionalAPI Best Practices
94. @emotionalAPI Pick One Thing
95. @emotionalAPI No overnight success
96. @emotionalAPI You’re Never Done
97. @emotionalAPI It’s OK
98. Soft Skills Super Hard Skills
99. @emotionalAPI DEEP BREATH
100. @emotionalAPI Thank You So Much This is just the start Mailing List: http://emotionalapi.com Twitter: @emotionalAPI
101. @emotionalAPI Come get a feeling wheel! I’d love to hear what your ‘one thing’ is
102. @emotionalAPI References [1],[2] “…a lack of power impairs our cognitive function.’ Amy Cuddy, Presence 119 [3] “In fact, people who have a high sense of personal control…cope significantly better in crisis…because their executive functions are intact” Amy Cuddy, Presence, 136 [4] “Powerlessness makes us self-absorbed” Amy Cuddy, Presence 121 [5] “Helping children improve their self-awareness and confidence, manage their disturbing emotional impulses and increase their empathy pays off not just in improved behavior but in measurable academic achievement.” — Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence xi [6] “The [people who feel] powerful process information more abstractly, integrating information to extract the gist, detecting patterns and relationships” Smith, P.K., Dijkterhuis, A, & Wigbuldus, D.H. Psychology Science, 19, 1258-1259 [7] “Subjects made to feel powerful judged emotional expression more accurately.” Amy Cuddy, Presence 127 [8] “…having high leadership potential were far stronger in EI competencies…” Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence xiii [9] “Those who can mange their emotional lives with more calm and self-awareness … have … distinct and measurable health advantage … confirmed by many studies” Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence xi [10] “…when they were asked to name the emotion, the ventrolateral prefrontal cortex activated and reduced the emotional amygdala reactivity. In other words, consciously recognizing the emotions reduced their impact.” David Rock, Your Brain At Work 127 [11] Gross found that people who tried to suppress a negative emotional experience failed to do so. While they thought they looked fine outwardly, inwardly their limbic system was just as aroused as without suppression. Trying not to feel something doesn’t work, and in some cases even backfires. David Rock, Your Brain At Work 119