Your Emotional API: How to be a better developer by being a better human

Imagine we have an API endpoint which, when called, makes us feel angry. Imagine also that there are thousands of aliases that redirect to it. People and situations can call those endpoints at any time. It’s up to us to decide what response to send.

Feelings are messy and uncomfortable, why don’t we just ignore them? Because ignoring them inhibits our ability to code. Increases in emotional mastery can have impacts on our productivity and even careers.

We talk theory and practice for healthy emotions, with code samples!

Transcript

1. Your Emotional API
   How to be a better developer by being a better human
   

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2. @emotionalAPI
   John Sawers
   Founder and CTO of Data Simply
   Architect at Privia Health
   @emotionalapi
   @johnksawers
   http://emotionalapi.com
   

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3. “Emotions just make so much sense to me”
   — No One Ever
   

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4. @emotionalAPI
   Cry
   Make a Scene
   Throw a Fit
   Whine
   Yell
   Don’t
   

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5. @emotionalAPI
   Do
   1.
   2.
   3.
   4.
   5.
   6.
   7.
   8.
   

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6. @emotionalAPI
   post '/feels/anger' do

   ...

   end

   post '/feels/sadness' do

   ...

   end

   post '/feels/fear' do

   ...

   end

   post '/feels/shame' do

   ...

   end

   post '/feels/joy' do

   ...

   end

   post '/feels/love' do

   ...

   end

   Endpoints
   

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7. @emotionalAPI
   There’s another layer
   delete '/job/12', 301: '/feels/sadness'

   put '/events/mother/visit', 301: '/feels/anger'

   put '/baby/new', 301: '/feels/fear'

   post '/people/co-worker/comments/jerk', 301: '/feels/anger'

   get '/people/boss/compliment', 301: '/feels/pride
   

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8. @emotionalAPI
   There’s another layer
   delete '/job/:id'

   100.times do

   Thread.new(post('/feels/fear')

   end

   20.times do

   Thread.new(post('/feels/sadness')

   end

   end
   

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9. @emotionalAPI
   It’s A Public API
   The Bad News
   

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10. @emotionalAPI
    You Control The
    Implementation
    The Good News
    

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11. @emotionalAPI
    How Your Feeling Server Works
    Version: HTTP/1.0
    Content-Type: application/feels
    Content-Length: ∞
    Timeout: 7200
    (hint: not very well)
    

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12. When The Big Feels Hit
    @emotionalAPI
    

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13. @emotionalAPI
    20
    Minutes
    

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14. @emotionalAPI
    1. 20 Minutes Max
    2.
    3.
    4.
    5.
    6.
    7.
    System Properties
    

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15. You can control where
    and when you express
    your feelings
    (But you don’t have to)
    

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16. @emotionalAPI
    get('/feels/anger').perform_later
    

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17. @emotionalAPI
    1. 20 Minutes
    2. Delayed Jobs
    3.
    4.
    5.
    6.
    7.
    System Properties
    

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18. Why Bother?
    That sounds really messy
    

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19. Better Human?
    

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20. @emotionalAPI
    Cognitive Problems
    

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21. @emotionalAPI
    Cognitive Problems
    Poorer Executive Function [1]
    

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22. @emotionalAPI
    Cognitive Problems
    Poorer Short Term Memory [2]
    

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23. @emotionalAPI
    Cognitive Problems
    Lower ability to handle stress and cope with crisis [3]
    

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24. @emotionalAPI
    Cognitive Problems
    More self-centered [4]
    

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25. @emotionalAPI
    Cognitive Benefits
    

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26. @emotionalAPI
    Cognitive Benefits
    “not just in improved behavior but in measurable academic
    achievement.”[5]
    

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27. @emotionalAPI
    Cognitive Benefits
    “…process information more abstractly, integrating information to
    extract the gist, detecting patterns and relationships”[6]
    

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28. @emotionalAPI
    Cognitive Benefits
    “…judged emotional expression more accurately”[7]
    

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29. @emotionalAPI
    Express your ideas better
    Social Benefits
    

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30. @emotionalAPI
    Better career advancement[8]
    Social Benefits
    

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31. @emotionalAPI
    Empathy!
    Social Benefits
    

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32. @emotionalAPI
    Help others with their emotional challenges
    Social Benefits
    

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33. @emotionalAPI
    Health Benefits
    “measurable health advantage”[9]
    

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34. Better Developer?
    

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35. @emotionalAPI
    Code Reviews
    

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36. @emotionalAPI
    Degraded Cognition
    

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37. @emotionalAPI
    Distraction
    

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38. @emotionalAPI
    Problematic Teammates
    

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39. @emotionalAPI
    Impostor Syndrome
    

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40. @emotionalAPI
    Interviewed, Hired, Fired
    

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41. @emotionalAPI
    Manage & Mentor
    

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42. http://frontside.io/
    Senior
    Software
    Developer
    

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43. More Details
    

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44. @emotionalAPI
    1. 20 Minutes Max
    2. Delayed Jobs
    3.
    4.
    5.
    6.
    7.
    System Properties
    

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45. @emotionalAPI
    They Don’t Mean Anything
    

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46. @emotionalAPI
    You’re Human
    

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47. @emotionalAPI
    Fear of Loss of Control
    

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48. @emotionalAPI
    Fear of Loss of Control
    A constructive way to express anger?
    

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49. @emotionalAPI
    Fear of Loss of Control
    A constructive way to express anger?
    No such thing?
    

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50. @emotionalAPI
    It’s Just Energy
    

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51. @emotionalAPI
    It’s Just Energy
    Dancing
    Singing
    Exercise
    

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52. @emotionalAPI
    Practice Talking
    

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53. “…consciously recognizing
    the emotions reduced
    their impact.”
    David Rock
    Your Brain At Work[10]
    

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54. @emotionalAPI
    

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55. @emotionalAPI
    

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56. @emotionalAPI
    “I feel” vs. “I am”
    

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57. @emotionalAPI
    There’s no such thing as
    how you ‘really feel’
    

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58. @emotionalAPI
    It’s Enumerable, not
    Boolean
    how_you_really_feel = [,…]
    

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59. @emotionalAPI
    There Is No Should
    

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60. “Trying not to feel
    something doesn’t work,
    and in some cases even
    backfires”
    David Rock
    Your Brain At Work[11]
    

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61. @emotionalAPI
    1. 20 Minutes
    2. Delayed Jobs
    3. It Doesn’t Mean Anything
    4. You Won’t Lose Control
    5. It’s Just Energy
    6. Talking Makes It Better
    7. All Feelings Are Valid
    8. There Is Nothing You Should Be Feeling
    9. Repression Doesn’t work
    System Properties
    

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62. @emotionalAPI
    Do
    •GET /feels/anger/meaning, response: nil
    •self.body(:move)
    •@confidant.send_message(“I feel so sad about…”)
    •@self.send_message(“I feel so hurt about…”)
    

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63. @emotionalAPI
    How did I get here?
    “…an intensive 20-hr Weekend Retreat in which you will explore
    your erroneous belief systems, learn to appropriately express
    emotions in a manner that heals…”
    Purpose • Passion • Peace
    http://aliceamos.me/p3retreat/
    

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64. A Journey Through Anger
    

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65. @emotionalAPI
    

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66. @emotionalAPI
    GET '/events/something/trivial'
    ⬇
    POST ‘/feels/anger'
    

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67. @emotionalAPI
    Do
    

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68. @emotionalAPI
    Safe Space
    

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69. @emotionalAPI
    Throw A Fit
    

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70. @emotionalAPI
    Do:
    •GET /feels/anger/meaning, response: nil
    •self.body(:move)
    •@confidant.send_message(“I feel so sad about…”)
    •@self.send_message(“I feel so hurt about…”)
    •SafeSpace.new(throw Fit.new(“ARRRGH”))
    

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71. A Journey Through Sadness
    

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72. @emotionalAPI
    delete ‘/v5/parents/marriage’

    

    post ‘/v6/parents/:dad_id/set_emotional_distance/100’

    

    post ‘/v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer’

    

    delete ‘/v17/parents/:dad_id’
    

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73. @emotionalAPI
    /v5
    delete ‘/v5/parents/marriage’ do

    20.times.do {

    Thread.new(get('/feels/fear'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/blame'))

    }

    delete('/feels/self_worth')

    end
    

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74. @emotionalAPI
    /v8
    post /v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer do

    20.times.do {

    Thread.new(delete('/v5/parents/marriage'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/fear'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness'))

    }

    end
    

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75. @emotionalAPI
    /v17
    def ‘/v17/parents/:dad_id’ do

    1000.times.do {

    Thread.new(post('/v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer'))

    Thread.new(delete('/v5/parents/marriage'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/anger'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness'))

    }

    end
    

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76. @emotionalAPI
    Daddy
    Issues
    

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77. @emotionalAPI
    Stack Trace
    NoMethodError - undefined method `paternal_approval’ for BossClass:
    /me/feels/panic.rb:9:in `initialize'
    /me/feels/love/daddy:14:in `none_for_you’
    /me/feels/fear/mistake/guaranteed_to_be_fired:21:in `realize_mistake’
    /me/events/releases/prod/bug_count/metrics.rb:39:in `count_bugs’
    

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78. @emotionalAPI
    Stack Trace
    NoMethodError - undefined method `paternal_approval’ for BossClass:
    /me/feels/panic.rb:9:in `initialize'
    /me/feels/love/daddy:14:in `none_for_you’
    /me/feels/fear/mistake/guaranteed_to_be_fired:21:in `realize_mistake’
    /me/events/releases/prod/bug_count/metrics.rb:39:in `count_bugs’
    

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79. Cry
    

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80. “Crying doesn’t indicate
    you are weak, since birth
    it has always been a sign
    to indicate you are alive”
    — attributed to Charlotte Brontë
    

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81. @emotionalAPI
    /v17
    def ‘/v17/parents/:dad_id’ do

    1000.times.do {

    Thread.new(post('/v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer'))

    Thread.new(delete('/v5/parents/marriage'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/anger'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness'))

    }

    end
    

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82. @emotionalAPI
    Diff
    def ‘/v17/parents/:dad_id’ do

    1000.times.do {
    500.times.do {

    Thread.new(post('/v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer'))

    Thread.new(delete('/v5/parents/marriage'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/anger'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness'))

    }

    end
    

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83. @emotionalAPI
    Diff
    get ‘/me/events/releases/prod/bugs/count_high’ do

    Thread.new(get('/feels/unloved'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/panic'))

    puts 'oops'

    fix_it

    move_on

    end
    

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84. @emotionalAPI
    Another Method
    post ‘/me/events/message/something_important_to_talk_about’ do

    

    end
    

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85. @emotionalAPI
    Another Method
    post ‘/me/events/message/something_important_to_talk_about’ do

    self.set_state(:fear)

    origin = self.feels[:fear].inspect_origin || self.feels[:fear].perform_now

    

    end
    

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86. The Five Whys
    https://open.buffer.com/5-whys-process/
    

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87. @emotionalAPI
    Another Method
    post ‘/me/events/message/something_important_to_talk_about’ do

    self.set_state(:fear)

    origin = self.feels[:fear].inspect_origin || self.feels[:fear].perform_now

    self.clear_history(origin)

    self.set_time(Time.now)

    reappraise_situation(:current)

    end
    

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88. @emotionalAPI
    Baggage
    

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89. @emotionalAPI
    Emotional Mentorship
    You can do this work on your own
    But it’s more powerful and rewarding to do it with others.
    

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90. @emotionalAPI
    Open Sourcing Mental Illness is
    a campaign founded by Ed
    Finkler to change how we deal
    with mental health in the tech
    community.
    https://osmihelp.org/
    @OSMIhelp
    

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91. @emotionalAPI
    Self Awareness (Monitoring)
    

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92. @emotionalAPI
    Do:
    •GET /feels/anger/meaning, response: nil
    •self.body(:move)
    •@confidant.send_message(“I feel so sad about…”)
    •@self.send_message(“I feel so hurt about…”)
    •SafeSpace.new(throw Fit.new(“ARRRGGH”)
    •SafeSpace.new(:cry)
    •Service start nagios
    •Week.days.each(:practice)
    •config.treads = false
    •self.get_help(:therapist_service)
    

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93. @emotionalAPI
    Best Practices
    

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94. @emotionalAPI
    Pick One Thing
    

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95. @emotionalAPI
    No overnight success
    

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96. @emotionalAPI
    You’re Never Done
    

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97. @emotionalAPI
    It’s OK
    

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98. Soft Skills
    Super Hard Skills
    

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99. @emotionalAPI
    DEEP BREATH
    

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100. @emotionalAPI
     Thank You So Much
     This is just the start
     Mailing List: http://emotionalapi.com
     Twitter: @emotionalAPI
     

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101. @emotionalAPI
     Come get a feeling wheel!
     I’d love to hear what your
     ‘one thing’ is
     

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102. @emotionalAPI
     References
     [1],[2] “…a lack of power impairs our cognitive function.’ Amy Cuddy, Presence 119
     [3] “In fact, people who have a high sense of personal control…cope significantly better in crisis…because their
     executive functions are intact” Amy Cuddy, Presence, 136
     [4] “Powerlessness makes us self-absorbed” Amy Cuddy, Presence 121
     [5] “Helping children improve their self-awareness and confidence, manage their disturbing emotional impulses and
     increase their empathy pays off not just in improved behavior but in measurable academic achievement.” — Daniel
     Goleman, Emotional Intelligence xi
     [6] “The [people who feel] powerful process information more abstractly, integrating information to extract the gist,
     detecting patterns and relationships” Smith, P.K., Dijkterhuis, A, & Wigbuldus, D.H. Psychology Science, 19, 1258-1259
     [7] “Subjects made to feel powerful judged emotional expression more accurately.” Amy Cuddy, Presence 127
     [8] “…having high leadership potential were far stronger in EI competencies…” Daniel Goleman, Emotional
     Intelligence xiii
     [9] “Those who can mange their emotional lives with more calm and self-awareness … have … distinct and
     measurable health advantage … confirmed by many studies” Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence xi
     [10] “…when they were asked to name the emotion, the ventrolateral prefrontal cortex activated and reduced the
     emotional amygdala reactivity. In other words, consciously recognizing the emotions reduced their impact.” David
     Rock, Your Brain At Work 127
     [11] Gross found that people who tried to suppress a negative emotional experience failed to do so. While they
     thought they looked fine outwardly, inwardly their limbic system was just as aroused as without suppression. Trying
     not to feel something doesn’t work, and in some cases even backfires. David Rock, Your Brain At Work 119
     

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