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Hit Reset: How to re-find your courage and make radical change right now

2618eb8fa459e5cef8f7a8d8f6a21c59?s=47 UX Y'all
September 29, 2021

Hit Reset: How to re-find your courage and make radical change right now

UX Y'all Keynote Session with Sara Wachter-Boettcher


UX Y'all

September 29, 2021

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  1. How to re-find your courage and make radical change right

    now Sara Wachter-Boettcher HIT RESET
  2. What a year.

  3. What a year...and a half.

  4. What a year...and a half... and counting.


  6. Rest Justice

  7. Self Others

  8. Either Or

  9. Rest Justice

  10. ON TRAUMA I.

  11. *I’m not a clinician (and you probably aren’t, either).

  12. Trauma An event, series of events, or set of circumstances

    that is experienced by an individual as physically or emotionally harmful or life threatening and that has lasting adverse effects on the individual’s functioning and mental, physical, social, emotional, or spiritual well-being. U.S. DHHS Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration
  13. In other words Trauma occurs when our experience of a

    harmful event is so stressful, it exceeds our ability to cope, process, and move on.
  14. None
  15. Traumatic experiences need processing time.

  16. Laura van Dernoot Lipsky Founder, Trauma Stewardship Institute

  17. “ The more we try to protect ourselves through not

    being fully present to what is unfolding in our lives, the more we feel the effects of trauma exposure. Laura van Dernoot Lipsky and Connie Burk, Trauma Stewardship
  18. None
  19. None
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  21. None
  22. What we push down leaks out.

  23. What we push down leaks out... on those we perceive

    as less powerful than us.
  24. Power dynamics we exploit • Structural: people from historically oppressed

    or marginalized groups • Positional: people who report to us or are in more junior roles than us • Social: those we see as having a weaker network or less social capital • Expertise: people we perceive as lacking knowledge or skills that we have
  25. “ We are dangerous when we are not conscious of

    our responsibility for how we behave, think, and feel. Marshall B. Rosenberg, PhD, Nonviolent Communication
  26. Self-care Community care

  27. Self-care Community care


  29. “Everything’s on fire right now. I can’t worry about myself.”

  30. “ We can be addicted to the rush of adrenaline—it’s

    tempting to stay wired when the alternative is to slow down and feel what is going on within and around us. Laura van Dernoot Lipsky and Connie Burk, Trauma Stewardship
  31. Name your feelings—and get specific.

  32. From The Gottman Institute Developed by Dr. Gloria Willcox

  33. From The Gottman Institute Developed by Dr. Gloria Willcox “Stressed”

  34. Practice observing your emotions, not judging them.

  35. I shouldn’t be angry. What’s my anger telling me?

  36. Drs. Richard Tedeschi & Lawrence Calhoun Researchers, Post-Traumatic Growth

  37. Post-traumatic growth Positive changes that occur as a result of

    working through crisis moments—such as new appreciation for life, more meaningful relationships, increased sense of personal strength, or changed priorities. Richard G. Tedeschi, PhD, and Lawrence G. Calhoun, PhD
  38. “ One part of this experience that seems to be

    important is to be able to talk it through—to be able to tell the story... What changes are happening in me and what am I going to do with all this? Richard Tedeschi, PhD “Speaking of Psychology,” Dec. 18. 2019
  39. Why can’t I just get motivated? How have my goals

  40. I shouldn’t complain. Other people have it worse. What has

    this time felt like for me?
  41. There are no winners when we stack-rank our suffering.


  43. Burnout isn’t just about workload. It’s about feeling chronically unsuccessful.

  44. Burnout isn’t just about workload. It’s about feeling powerless.

  45. “ Even the most challenging circumstances can be more bearable

    if we feel that we have some say in the outcome, while small stresses may become exaggerated if we feel that we are completely helpless. David Robson, BBC Worklife December 14, 2020
  46. Unhelpful ways we seek control • Micromanaging and refusing to

    delegate • Perfectionism; avoiding sharing work in progress or collaborating • Questioning and nitpicking our team’s work • Surveillance of team members’ hours, whereabouts, etc. • Being rigid and unable to adapt/shift gears
  47. Healthy ways to find control • Commit to a new

    work/life boundary (e.g., a shutdown time, taking Slack off your phone) • Start and protect a new routine (e.g., a daily walk at 2pm) • Set a priority each week and block out deep time to work on it—before anything else
  48. “ Before starting your workday, take a moment to literally

    stop in your tracks and ask yourself, “Why am I doing what I am doing?” After you hear your answer, remind yourself, gently, that you are making a choice to do this work. Laura van Dernoot Lipsky and Connie Burk, Trauma Stewardship
  49. I have to do this. I’m choosing to do this

    because I’m scared of retaliation if I say “no.”
  50. Moral injury Moral injury is the damage done to one’s

    conscience or moral compass when that person perpetrates, witnesses, or fails to prevent acts that transgress one’s own moral beliefs, values, or ethical codes of conduct. The Moral Injury Project at Syracuse University
  51. Emotional exhaustion. We feel shut down and overwhelmed. Detachment. We

    are avoidant and distant from our colleagues. Depersonalization. We are less able to see others’ humanity. Cynicism. We become biased toward the negative. Dissatisfaction. We become overly critical and lack joy. How it harms our users What burnout does We avoid hard conversations, e.g., about harm and exclusion. We can’t collaborate, so we lose out on diverse POVs. We lose compassion for users and ignore our impact. We treat harm as inevitable and assume we’re powerless. We shut down ideas too soon, and lose creative solutions.

  53. Advocating for change takes clarity and courage. Connecting with our

    values helps with both.
  54. Inaccessible and hostile interfaces Nonconsensual data collection Dark patterns Gender-based

    harassment Surveillance tech sold to police Racist financial algorithms Wide-scale social media-fueled disinformation Stereotypes and cultural appropriation in design Coordinated trolling campaigns Online radicalization of young men Social media-driven body dysmorphia Smartphone addiction Environmentally disastrous Bitcoin mining
  55. Desiree Adaway Diversity, equity, inclusion, and belonging expert

  56. “ We’re busy all the time... Busy overthinking things and

    not trusting our decisions. White supremacy loves that. White supremacy knows that when we’re exhausted we remain obedient. And when we’re overworked, we tend to stay quiet. Desiree Adaway, “Sense of Urgency Keeps Us Disconnected”
  57. It’s not just OK to focus. It’s necessary.


  59. Do I have power? Where do I have power?

  60. None
  61. Psychological immune system When negative experiences (like criticism or rejection)

    threaten our sense of self-integrity, our brains kick in to protect us. This system can be defensive, distorting facts or rejecting all new information and lashing out against it. Gilbert, Pinel, Wilson, Blumberg, and Wheatley, 1998
  62. Self-affirmation theory The practice of reflecting on our values using

    real examples in moments where our sense of self feels threatened. This allows us to protect our self-esteem without without reacting defensively. Claude Steele, 1988
  63. Finding courageous moments • When have you lived your values?

    What made that possible for you? • Think of a time when you felt true to yourself. What traits were you showing in that moment? • What’s a risk you’ve taken that you’re proud of? How did you find the courage to take it?
  64. Concrete examples of who we are and what we believe

    give us something to call upon in hard times.
  65. HIT RESET V.

  66. Normal isn’t good enough. It never was.

  67. “ We repeat what we don’t repair. Christine Langley-Obaugh

  68. None
  69. Giving yourself space to heal is an act of courage.

    Slowing down shifts the status quo.
  70. How will you hit reset on your beliefs right now?

  71. Thank you! activevoicehq.com sara@activevoicehq.com @sara_ann_marie @activevoicehq