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Late Shows 2016: Starfleet Recruitment (Presentation 2)

Late Shows 2016: Starfleet Recruitment (Presentation 2)

Spoof Star Trek presentation, made to introduce students to ideas about matter transference.

Beatrix Groves

May 15, 2016
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Transcript

  1. USS Enterprise NCC-1701 • Speedy transport to and from an

    orbiting starship is accomplished by two methods. • Shuttle craft • Transporter • Transporter phobia?
  2. Recruit Issues: Transporter • How it works: • Object (person)

    is scanned by high-definition Zeon waves. • The resultant configuration of the object's sub-atomic particles is recorded by computer and stored in a pattern buffer. • The object's mass is reduced to energy • The object's energy is transmitted to the destination • The object's energy is transmuted into matter based on the contents of the pattern buffer.
  3. Transporter Issues: Scanning • German physicist Werner Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle

    (1927 Old Style) states that NO thing has a definite position, a definite trajectory, or a definite momentum. • This has little meaningful impact for macro sized objects. • But for sub-atomic particles it means you can know only a particles position or movement, NOT both!
  4. Transporter Issues: Storage • This was a major problem until

    Dr Emory Erikson statistically solved the 'Uncertainty' problem in 2039. • A secondary problem was computer storage. • It would take a trillion terabytes of conventional 21st century hard disk storage to store the information necessary to encode one person. • This was an impossible situation until the invention of duotronic, multitronic and isolinear data storage systems in the 24th century.
  5. Transporter Issues: Identity • Recruits have queried as to whether

    they are the same person after transportation than they were before. • If their 'original' bodies are destroyed and then reconstructed at destination, is the original individual not 'dead'? • Does this imply that entities are purely 'atoms' and there is no such thing as the mind/soul? • This has caused problems with religious individuals refusing to be transported • What are the chances of the random inclusion of non-human material in the transporter beam, caused by tiny objects (e.g. a fly) getting caught in the dissolution process?
  6. Transporter Facts • 93.26% safe, with no loss of staff

    in the past six earth-months • Occasional errors have occurred due to failure of pattern-buffers, targeting systems, external effects of galactic storms, or enemy fire. • One case of personality swapping, where Commender Spock found himself in the body of Yeoman Rand (and vice versa) • One occasion of transmission to an alternate universe where the crew of the Enterprise met their 'evil' opposites. • Should you be the victim of a transporter malfunction, please send all complaints to Starfleet Public Relations. This does not apply to crew members wearing red tunics.