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Tales after midnight @ webdeldn

Tales after midnight @ webdeldn

Tales after midnight is an anthology of modern horror cautionary stories, including “Don’t deploy that code”, “The CSS of Doom”, “Polaroid” et al.

It’s really important to be ready, in case it was you the pager was tolling for, just after midnight.

“Based on true stories” – me
“Not your typical horror stories” – also me
“The tales are varied as they are interesting and it promises to entertain readers from all types of horror genres” – not me, but also not necessarily about this talk

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Marco Cedaro

January 29, 2019
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Transcript

  1. None
  2. for whom thE pagEr tolls TalEs aftEr midnight

  3. for whom thE pagEr tolls TalEs aftEr midnight An anthology

    of short cautionary horror storiEs
  4. TalEs aftEr Midnight @cEdmax WEbmastEr bEforE it was cool 


    TEch LEad 
 Condé Nast IntErnational
  5. TalEs aftEr midnight "ThErE arE 5 typEs of EnginEErs:
 ThosE

    that havE brokEn production 
 and thosE who arE about 
 to brEak production" Matt BoylE for whom thE pagEr tolls
  6. ChaptEr #1 Don't DEPLOY
 that CODE

  7. Don't DEPLOY that CODE

  8. Don't DEPLOY that CODE

  9. Don't DEPLOY that CODE

  10. Don't DEPLOY that CODE

  11. Don't DEPLOY that CODE

  12. Don't DEPLOY that CODE

  13. Don't DEPLOY that CODE

  14. - our rollback stratEgy WHAT WENT WELL - thE procEss

    was pronE to Errors ☠ WHAT WENT WRONG - AUTOMATE ALL THE THINGS What wE lEarnt Don't DEPLOY that CODE
  15. ChaptEr #5 THE CSS OF DOOM

  16. http://www.winpix.net/content/images/2010/03/16_png_transparent_ie6.jpg THE CSS OF DOOM

  17. http://www.winpix.net/content/images/2010/03/16_png_transparent_ie6.jpg THE CSS OF DOOM

  18. http://www.winpix.net/content/images/2010/03/16_png_transparent_ie6.jpg THE CSS OF DOOM

  19. img { behavior: url("pngbehavior.htc"); } THE CSS OF DOOM

  20. var supported = (/MSIE (5\.5)|[6789]/ .test(navigator.userAgent) && navigator.platform == "Win32");


    var blankSrc = "blank.gif"; if (supported) fixImage(); THE CSS OF DOOM
  21. function fixImage() { var src = element.src; if ( /\.png$/.test(

    src.toLowerCase() ) ) { element.src = blankSrc; element.runtimeStyle.filter = 
 "progid:DXImageTransform.Microsoft.AlphaImageLoader(src='" + src + "',sizingMethod='scale')"; } } THE CSS OF DOOM
  22. var supported = (/MSIE (5\.5)|[6789]/ .test(navigator.userAgent) && navigator.platform == "Win32");


    var blankSrc = "blank.gif"; if (supported) fixImage(); THE CSS OF DOOM
  23. THE CSS OF DOOM

  24. THE CSS OF DOOM

  25. - I havE a fun story to tEll
 - our

    rollback stratEgy WHAT WENT WELL - I don't EvEn know whErE to start:
 - using thE prod db for monitoring
 - assuming thE CSS CAn't BREAK anything
 - siloEd & BlamE culturE ☠ WHAT WENT WRONG - You nEEd to undErstand thE systEm What I lEarnt THE CSS OF DOOM
  26. ChaptEr #3 POLAROID

  27. Replica Replica Polaroid

  28. Replica Replica Polaroid

  29. Polaroid

  30. Polaroid

  31. - Run books didn't havE anything on thE issuE -

    ThE support Escalation paths wErE wrong - WE FAILED TO COMMUNICATE THE FIX Polaroid
  32. - wE CAUGHT THE PROBLEM BEFORE IT BECAME CRITICAL WHAT

    WENT WELL - Monitoring wasn't sEtup for thE rEplicas
 - ThE runbooks wErEn't updatEd ☠ WHAT WENT WRONG - you can't control EvErything
 - communication is KEy What wE lEarnt Polaroid
  33. AppEndix POST MORTEM

  34. Post MortEm - Summary THE DOCUMENT

  35. - Summary - TimElinE THE DOCUMENT Post MortEm

  36. - Summary - TimElinE - Impact THE DOCUMENT Post MortEm

  37. - Summary - TimElinE - Impact - Diagnosis THE DOCUMENT

    Post MortEm
  38. - Summary - TimElinE - Impact - Diagnosis - Actions

    THE DOCUMENT Post MortEm
  39. - KEEp thE mEEting small - KEEp it tEchnical -

    Focus on thE whys? - MakE surE thE actions arE rEalistic - KEEp it blamElEss SUGGESTIONS Post MortEm
  40. TakEaways - Sh*t will go wrong, BE prEparEd - KEEp

    your docs updatEd - Try to undErstand your APP/STACK - Don't BLAME PEOPLE BUT PROCESSES for whom thE pagEr tolls TalEs aftEr midnight