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Jordan Falk
September 17, 2023
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ghosted
Jordan Falk
September 17, 2023
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Transcript
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Another pint coming down!
Another pint coming down!
Another pint coming down!
Another pint coming down!
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Whooosh!
Whooosh!
Whooosh!
Whooosh!
Whooosh!
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Ha ha!
Ha ha!
(O.S.) cheering
(O.S.) cheering
(O.S.) cheering
(O.S.) cheering
clink!
That’s my husband, Gerald.
That’s my husband, Gerald.
He invents cocktails.
He invents cocktails.
He named one for me after my death.
He named one for me after my death.
He named one for me after my death.
I didn’t realize he’d put olives in it.
I didn’t realize he’d put olives in it.
My face and throat swelled up,
My face and throat swelled up,
I started coughing up blood and…
I started coughing up blood and…
I started coughing up blood and…
…the Bloody Mary…
…the Bloody Mary…
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At your service.
At your service.
Can I get you another ghost beer?
Can I get you another ghost beer?
Can I get you another ghost beer?
You know, I came of age during Prohibition
and even I can tell this isn’t as good as
the real thing.
and even I can tell this isn’t as good as
the real thing.
and even I can tell this isn’t as good as
the real thing.
and even I can tell this isn’t as good as
the real thing.
and even I can tell this isn’t as good as
the real thing.
and even I can tell this isn’t as good as
the real thing.
and even I can tell this isn’t as good as
the real thing.
(SFX) fizzle
(SFX) fizzle
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I hear there’s a hopping bar scene in the afterlife.
I hear there’s a hopping bar scene in the afterlife.
And I want to go there!
And I want to go there!
But…
Henry hasn’t acknowledged your presence yet?
Henry hasn’t acknowledged your presence yet?
Grrrrrr!
Grrrrrr!
I’ve tried everything!
I’ve tried everything!
I’ve tried everything!
I’ve tried everything!
I’ve tried everything!
I’ve tried everything!
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No matter what I do!
He doesn’t see me!
What am I doing wrong?!
What am I doing wrong?!
Oh, he can see you.
You stayed here to haunt him, he can see you.
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(sniff)
Can Gerald…?
Gerald?
Ha!
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Chug! Chug! Chug!
Chug! Chug! Chug!
Chug! Chug! Chug!
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(Cheering)
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No, I couldn’t be bothered to haunt Gerald.
No, I couldn’t be bothered to haunt Gerald.
No, I couldn’t be bothered to haunt Gerald.
Then what long-held passion keeps you
tethered to this mortal coil?
tethered to this mortal coil?
(mumbling) I swear, nothing’s where it should be anymore…
(mumbling) I swear, nothing’s where it should be anymore…
(mumbling) I swear, nothing’s where it should be anymore…
(mumbling) I swear, nothing’s where it should be anymore…
(mumbling) I swear, nothing’s where it should be anymore…
(mumbling) Nobody cares!
(mumbling) Nobody cares!
(mumbling) Nobody cares!
(mumbling) That’s it, nobody cares…
(mumbling) That’s it, nobody cares…
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Listen dear.
Time passes differently for us.
For Henry it’s been 30 years since you died.
I suspect your failure to move on has more to
do with
YOU than with him.
YOU than with him.
So what do I do?
So what do I do?
Try TALKING to him, dear.
Try TALKING to him, dear.
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What do I owe you?
What do I owe you?
It’s ghost money dear, it’s on the house.
It’s ghost money dear, it’s on the house.
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