HOWTO Empathy - the HumanOps edition

Transcript

1. HOWTO EMPATHY
   Emma Jane Hogbin Westby
   @emmajanehw
   #humanops
   

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2. A primer on how I taught myself to

   be more empathetic.
   

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3. MY AGENDA
   I want to help you to:
   Improve your team’s cohesion.
   Design interactions to get outcomes you need.
   Diversify how you think.
   Solve hard problems.
   

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4. THE BASICS
   Sympathy, Empathy, and Normal People
   

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5. DEFINE: SYMPATHY
   The feelings of pity and sorrow
   for someone else's misfortune.
   

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6. DEFINE: EMPATHY
   The ability to understand and share
   the feelings of another.
   

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7. Temple Grandin
   Normal people have an
   incredible lack of empathy.
   

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9. PRACTICING EMPATHY
   Level 1: Care just enough to learn more about a person’s life.
   Level 2: Use thinking strategies to structure interactions.
   Level 3: Engage with the world from another’s perspective.
   

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10. LEVEL 1.
    CARING JUST ENOUGH
    Difficulty — Beginner
    

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11. REWARDS & RISKS
    Improves team cohesion.
    Requires a time investment.
    CARING JUST ENOUGH
    

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12. ASK QUESTIONS.
    Talk to people and collect their stories.
    CARING JUST ENOUGH
    

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13. GIVE ATTENTION.
    If you are thinking about your response,
    you are not truly listening.
    CARING JUST ENOUGH
    

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14. REFER BACK.
    Ask about stories you’ve previously collected.
    CARING JUST ENOUGH
    

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15. LEVEL 2.
    THINKING STRATEGIES
    Difficulty — Intermediate
    

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16. REWARDS & RISKS
    Able to engineer successful outcomes.
    Improves capacity for diverse thinking.
    Perceived as manipulative.
    THINKING STRATEGIES
    

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17. UNCOVER MOTIVATORS.
    THINKING STRATEGIES
    Unpack why a person behaves the way they do.
    

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18. Emma’s
    

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19. THINKING STRATEGIES
    Decision-Making
    validate
    values-driven
    experience
    crux
    trust your heart
    conclude
    Understanding
    clarify
    empathise
    tune-in
    scan
    express
    structure
    Creativity
    brainstorm
    challenge
    reframe
    envision
    flow
    flash of insight
    

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20. THINKING STRATEGIES
    Decision-Making
    validate
    values-driven
    experience
    crux
    trust your heart
    conclude
    Understanding
    clarify
    empathise
    tune-in
    scan
    express
    structure
    Creativity
    brainstorm
    challenge
    reframe
    envision
    flow
    flash of insight
    

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21. CREATIVE THINKING
    brainstorm
    challenge
    reframe
    envision
    flow
    flash of insight
    

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22. RECOGNISE

    CREATIVE LANGUAGE
    Can we try ...
    I know we’re done, but what about ...
    OMG! I just had this great idea ...
    Why do you think ...
    Is this the best we can do ...
    

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23. UNDERSTANDING THINKING
    clarify
    empathise
    tune-in
    scan
    express
    structure
    

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24. RECOGNISE
    UNDERSTANDING LANGUAGE
    So what you’re saying is ...
    Just to clarify ...
    I think this is related to ...
    So I made this spreadsheet ...
    That must feel horrible!
    

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25. DECISION THINKING
    validate
    values-driven
    experience
    crux
    gut instinct
    conclude
    

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26. RECOGNISE
    DECISION LANGUAGE
    I’m ready to move on to ...
    I don’t know why I think this, but ...
    Last time we tried this ...
    The real problem is ...
    My gut tells me ...
    

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27. ORGANISE MEETINGS ACCORDING TO

    THINKING STRATEGIES

    NOT TOPICS
    TO GET THE OUTCOMES YOU NEED.
    

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29. LEVEL 3.
    IMAGINATION
    Difficulty — Advanced
    

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30. REWARDS & RISKS
    Truly creative problem solving.
    Potentially overwhelming
    Cause doubt for self-worth.
    IMAGINATION
    

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31. SEEK TO UNDERSTAND.
    Complain about yourself from the other’s perspective.
    IMAGINATION
    

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32. SEEK TO EXPERIENCE.
    Live your day through the other’s constraints.
    IMAGINATION
    

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33. IN SUMMARY
    • Level 1: Care just enough to improve team cohesion.
    • Level 2: Structure interactions to get outcomes you need,

    and diversify how you think.
    • Level 3: Use another’s perspective to overcome hard problems.
    

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34. Thinking is a skill to be practiced.
    EMPATHY
    PRACTITIONERS
    

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35. Maya Angelou
    I think we all have empathy.

    We may not have enough courage to display it.
    

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36. CULTIVATE EMPATHY
    follow-up:
    #humanops
    @emmajanehw 

    emma @ gitforteams.com
    http://gitforteams.com/resources/cultivating-empathy.html
    

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