Forgetting Java: Why Java Should Die in Flames and Take its Developers Along

Video available from here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LOcLwnV4Z2k
Java is old. Java is verbose. Java is ugly. Java is mocked and ridiculed by everyone and their dog. Hell, Java is dead. Well it's not but I'm preaching to the choir. Or am I? However convenient to say so, it's not exclusively Oracle to blame for Java's current state of the art. Java developers are guilty of laziness (the wrong kind), not questioning the tools they use (wrong again), following patterns (pretty much the right kind) they believe are blessed upon them yadda yadda yadda. Yet the communities around languages we find to be even lesser than Java offer world of a difference. The talk shows the tools, experiences and mindset we lack in the Java world. The virtues present elsewhere but needed here for Java to wipe the "enterprise-grade" solutions off the face of the world. Let's do this people. Let's do the right thing and get rid of the "enterprise" Java developers.

Transcript

1. Forgetting JAVA
   Why Java Should Die in Flames and Take its
   Developers Along
   Piotr Limanowski
   @peel
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2. PART I
   IS JAVA DEAD?
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3. Nope.
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4. Java might be
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5. dy•ing (dīˈĭng)
   v. Present participle of die.
   adj. About to die: dying language.
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6. dying by
   "verbosity"
   "poor type inference"
   "weak type system"
   "low-level support for concurrency/parallelism"
   "dependency hell"
   "OSS mostly comes from android & enterprises"
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7. If programming is going
   to be the thing I spend
   my time on,
   it damn well better be
   awesome.
   — David Heinemeier Hansen
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8. But, really...
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9. Is Java dead?
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10. COBOL
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11. TO
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12. OTHER LANGUAGES
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13. COBOL TO JAVA
    TRANSPILER
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14. Why?
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15. Java does not change.
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16. Why not C then?
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17. source & binary compatible
    since
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18. FOREVER
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19. type erasure
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20. let's change
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21. attract those crazy, eager,
    young, passionate,
    enthusiastic
    — someone, somewhere, someday
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22. Y U NO
    CHANGE?
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23. missing: happiness
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24. PROFFESSIONAL
    SINNERS
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25. PROFFESSIONAL
    ENTERPRISE
    SINNERS
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26. val virtues = "crazy" ::
    "eager" ::
    "young" ::
    "passionate" ::
    "enthusiastic" ::
    "happy"
    Nil
    virtues.dropWhile(wat)
    def wat = {
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27. PART II
    THE SINS
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28. IGNORANCE
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29. shell
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30. multiplexer tmux
    shell ZSH w/ prezto
    editor spacemacs
    sane defaults: skwp/dotfiles
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31. test feedback
    REPL
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32. REPL driven development
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33. 1. experiment in repl
    2. write test
    3. [opt] how to make test pass in repl?
    4. implement
    5. refactor
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34. gui git client?
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35. then how about...
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36. smart prompt
    multiple sessions
    session preserving
    quick file changes
    project generation
    finding files
    | operator
    microservices
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37. CLI ALL THE THINGS
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38. Java can't into shell.
    Properly.
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39. Grass is always greener:
    codegangsta/cli
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40. package main
    import (
    "os"
    "github.com/codegangsta/cli" //THIS
    )
    func main() {
    app := cli.NewApp()
    app.Name = "greet"
    app.Usage = "fight the loneliness!"
    app.Flags = []cli.Flag {
    cli.StringFlag{
    Name: "lang",
    Value: "english",
    Usage: "language for the greeting",
    },
    }
    app.Action = func(c *cli.Context) {
    name := "someone"
    if len(c.Args()) > 0 {
    name = c.Args()[0]
    }
    if c.String("lang") == "spanish" {
    println("Hola", name)
    } else {
    println("Hello", name)
    }
    }
    app.Run(os.Args)
    }
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41. Commander.rb
    Shell
    scopt.scala
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42. version management
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43. $ rvm install 2.2.3
    $ rvm use 2.2.3
    $ cd ..
    $ rvm install 2.2.4
    $ rvm use 2.2.0 --default
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44. jenv.io
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45. distribution
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46. OS packages
    self-contained fatjars
    containers
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47. App Servers are DEAD
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48. Server version
    dependency?
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49. Server monitoring?
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50. Call home
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51. Dead man's switch
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52. Status page
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53. DEV W/O OPS
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54. snowflake dev
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55. every hour is Ship It hour
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56. Continuous
    Delivery
    — Humble, Jez; Farley, David,
    Addison-Wesley, 2011
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57. Release It!
    — Nygard, Michael, Pragmatic
    Publishing, 2007
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58. 2007
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59. bulkheading
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60. circuit breakers
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61. @peel #tricityjug 61
    

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62. Logging (frameworks)
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63. Timestamp | Status | Entity Id | What happened | What
    did user do
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64. EASY
    NOT
    SIMPLE
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65. Build tools
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66. Maven
    
    ...
    
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67. Maven
    17
    ...
    1565
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68. 1565
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69. 
    !
    Separation?
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70. Gradle
    1 apply plugin: 'java'
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71. GREAT SUCCESS
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72. $ ls
    gradlew/
    src/
    build.gradle
    gradle.properties
    gradlew
    gradlew.bat
    settings.gradle
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73. Ant
    25
    ...
    233
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74. If I knew then what I know
    now, I would have tried
    using a real
    scripting language
    — James Duncan Davidson (creator of Ant)
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75. XML
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76. Grass is always greener:
    Rake
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77. rails/rails
    67 lines
    of code
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78. task default: %w[test]
    task :test do
    ruby "test/unittest.rb"
    end
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79. Sample
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80. Grass is always greener:
    Mix (Elixir)
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81. mix new my_project --module MyProject
    vim mix.exs
    mix deps.get
    npm install
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82. Dependency management
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83. 1565
    XML
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84. Grass is always greener:
    Bundler
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85. $ gem install bundler
    $ bundle init
    source 'https://rubygems.org'
    gem 'nokogiri'
    gem 'rails'
    gem 'rack', '>=1.0'
    gem 'thin', '~>1.1'
    gem 'globalid', github: 'rails/globalid', branch: 'master'
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86. Grass is always greener:
    Mix (Elixir)
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87. $ mix phoenix.server
    defmodule Chat.Mixfile do
    use Mix.Project
    def project do
    [app: :chat,
    version: "0.0.1",
    elixir: "~> 1.0",
    elixirc_paths: ["lib", "web"],
    compilers: [:phoenix] ++ Mix.compilers,
    deps: deps]
    end
    def application do
    [mod: {Chat, []},
    applications: [:phoenix, :phoenix_html, :cowboy, :logger]]
    end
    def deps do
    [{:phoenix, "~> 0.17"},
    {:phoenix_html, "~> 2.1"},
    {:phoenix_live_reload, "~> 1.0"},
    {:phoenix_ecto, "~> 0.9"},
    {:postgrex, ">= 0.0.0"},
    {:cowboy, "~> 1.0"}]
    end
    end
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88. Web Frameworks
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89. (Don't) fight the HTTP
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90. Java EE is a
    dead fish
    !
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91. @Spring
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92. Thanks to @Annotations,
    @Progress is
    @Unstoppable!
    — annotationmania.com
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93. spring boot w/ velocity
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94. Dropwizard
    no magic involved
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95. Grass is always greener:
    Phoenix
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96. $ mix phoenix.new hello_phoenix
    $ cd hello_phoenix
    $ mix phoenix.server
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97. FALSE IDOLS
    WAY TOO OFTEN
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98. GOF Design patterns
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99. It's good to know them.
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100. It's essential to understand them.
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101. FINALE
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102. Update your tools
     Look beyond the fence
     Question everything
     Kill the old
     Have fun
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103. One last thing...
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104. _INASWAN
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105. HAVE FUN
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106. HAKUNA MATATA
     THANKS
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