Dear User, Let's Be Friends: Designing Friendly Interfaces - UX Lisbon 2022

One of the best books on user experience design is Dale Carnegie’s 1936 How to Win Friends and Influence People. No, really. This classic manual on human relations is more relevant than ever as human-computer interaction increasingly mimics human-to-human interaction. (Consider: conversational design, chatbots, voice interfaces, AI assistants, etc.)

In this session, you'll learn how to craft friendlier, more humane experiences by applying Carnegie’s “Nine Golden Principles to Become a Friendlier Person” to the design of digital things. Each principle is illustrated with examples of good and (hilariously) bad practices. If your app or site knows how to smile, your users might smile right back. Doesn’t that sound nice?

As presented at UX Lisbon on May 27, 2022. #UXLX

Transcript

1. @SCOTTKUBIE LET’S BE FRIENDS DEAR USER: Scott Kubie Author, Writing for Designers Coach, Content Career Accelerator Host, UX Content Office Hours Publisher, UX Writing Events UXLX 2022
2. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE WRITE LIKE A HUMAN…
3. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE WRITE LIKE A HUMAN…
4. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE BUT WHAT KIND OF HUMAN?
6. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE ONE SERIOUSLY INFLUENTIAL BOOK. HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE ▸ First published in 1936 ▸ 17 editions published in the first year ▸ Over 30 million copies sold worldwide ▸ Your boss has probably read it
7. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE ONE SERIOUSLY INFLUENTIAL BOOK.
8. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE ONE SERIOUSLY INFLUENTIAL BOOK.
9. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE ONE SERIOUSLY INFLUENTIAL BOOK. 9 Golden Principles 1. No criticism 2. Sincere appreciation 3. An eager want 4. Genuine interest 5. Smile 6. Use their name 7. Listen 8. Speak of their interests 9. Make them feel important
10. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 1. DON’T CRITICIZE, CONDEMN, OR COMPLAIN. Dale Carnegie “The Golden Book” ➝ Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People ➝ Become a Friendlier Person PRINCIPLE ONE: NO CRITICISM
11. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE ONE: NO CRITICISM
12. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE ONE: NO CRITICISM
13. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE XCEL ENERGY PRINCIPLE ONE: NO CRITICISM
14. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE ONE: NO CRITICISM CONFIRMSHAMING.TUMBLR.COM | CRUELESTOPTOUTS.TUMBLR.COM
15. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE ONE: NO CRITICISM CONFIRMSHAMING.TUMBLR.COM | CRUELESTOPTOUTS.TUMBLR.COM
16. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE ONE: NO CRITICISM CONFIRMSHAMING.TUMBLR.COM | CRUELESTOPTOUTS.TUMBLR.COM
17. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE ONE: NO CRITICISM
18. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE ONE: NO CRITICISM
19. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 1. DON’T CRITICIZE, CONDEMN, OR COMPLAIN. Dale Carnegie “The Golden Book” ➝ Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People ➝ Become a Friendlier Person PRINCIPLE ONE: NO CRITICISM
20. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 2. GIVE HONEST, SINCERE APPRECIATION. Dale Carnegie “The Golden Book” ➝ Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People ➝ Become a Friendlier Person PRINCIPLE TWO: SINCERE APPRECIATION
21. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE ZAPPOS PRINCIPLE TWO: APPRECIATION
23. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE HY-VEE AISLES ONLINE PRINCIPLE TWO: APPRECIATION
24. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE TWO: APPRECIATION
25. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE TWO: APPRECIATION
26. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE VIA SCREENSHOTSOFDESPAIR.TUMBLR.COM PRINCIPLE TWO: APPRECIATION
27. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE APOLLO (REDDIT CLIENT) PRINCIPLE TWO: APPRECIATION
28. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 2. GIVE HONEST, SINCERE APPRECIATION. Dale Carnegie “The Golden Book” ➝ Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People ➝ Become a Friendlier Person PRINCIPLE TWO: APPRECIATION
29. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 3. AROUSE IN THE OTHER PERSON AN EAGER WANT. Dale Carnegie “The Golden Book” ➝ Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People ➝ Become a Friendlier Person PRINCIPLE THREE: AN EAGER WANT
30. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE THREE: AN EAGER WANT
31. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE THREE: AN EAGER WANT
32. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE THREE: AN EAGER WANT
33. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE LINKEDIN PRINCIPLE THREE: AN EAGER WANT Image via Peter Stahl’s excellent presentation “Rhythm and Flow” at IA Summit 2012
34. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE BILL.COM PRINCIPLE THREE: AN EAGER WANT ! ! ! ! ! !
35. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE THREE: AN EAGER WANT
36. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 3. AROUSE IN THE OTHER PERSON AN EAGER WANT. Dale Carnegie “The Golden Book” ➝ Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People ➝ Become a Friendlier Person PRINCIPLE THREE: AN EAGER WANT
37. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 4. BECOME GENUINELY INTERESTED IN OTHER PEOPLE. Dale Carnegie “The Golden Book” ➝ Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People ➝ Become a Friendlier Person PRINCIPLE FOUR: GENUINE INTEREST
38. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE FOUR: GENUINE INTEREST
39. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE FOUR: GENUINE INTEREST
40. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 4. APPEAR GENUINELY INTERESTED IN OTHER PEOPLE. Dale Carnegie The Golden Book ➝ Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People ➝ Become a Friendlier Person PRINCIPLE FOUR: GENUINE INTEREST
41. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 4. BECOME GENUINELY INTERESTED IN OTHER PEOPLE. Dale Carnegie The Golden Book ➝ Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People ➝ Become a Friendlier Person PRINCIPLE FOUR: GENUINE INTEREST
42. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE FOUR: GENUINE INTEREST
43. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE LEAN CANVAS PRINCIPLE FOUR: GENUINE INTEREST
44. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 4. BECOME GENUINELY INTERESTED IN OTHER PEOPLE. Dale Carnegie “The Golden Book” ➝ Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People ➝ Become a Friendlier Person PRINCIPLE FOUR: GENUINE INTEREST
45. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 5. SMILE. Dale Carnegie “The Golden Book” ➝ Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People ➝ Become a Friendlier Person PRINCIPLE FIVE: :)
46. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE YELP (IOS APP) PRINCIPLE FIVE: :)
47. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE FIVE: :)
48. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE NEWSBLUR PRINCIPLE FIVE: :)
49. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE SLACK PRINCIPLE FIVE: :)
50. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE FITBIT CHARGE HR PRINCIPLE FIVE: :)
51. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 5. SMILE. Dale Carnegie “The Golden Book” ➝ Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People ➝ Become a Friendlier Person PRINCIPLE FIVE: :)
52. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 6. A PERSON’S NAME IS … THE SWEETEST AND MOST IMPORTANT SOUND IN ANY LANGUAGE. Dale Carnegie “The Golden Book” ➝ Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People ➝ Become a Friendlier Person PRINCIPLE SIX: USE THEIR NAME
53. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE COMCAST PRINCIPLE SIX: USE THEIR NAME
54. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE SIX: USE THEIR NAME
55. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE SIX: USE THEIR NAME
56. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE SIX: USE THEIR NAME
57. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE CAM SCANNER PRINCIPLE SIX: USE THEIR NAME
58. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE SIX: USE THEIR NAME
59. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE GOOGLE NEWS PRINCIPLE SIX: USE THEIR NAME
60. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE SIX: USE THEIR NAME
61. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 6. A PERSON’S NAME IS … THE SWEETEST AND MOST IMPORTANT SOUND IN ANY LANGUAGE. Dale Carnegie “The Golden Book” ➝ Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People ➝ Become a Friendlier Person PRINCIPLE SIX: USE THEIR NAME
62. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 7. BE A GOOD LISTENER. ENCOURAGE OTHERS TO TALK ABOUT THEMSELVES. Dale Carnegie “The Golden Book” ➝ Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People ➝ Become a Friendlier Person PRINCIPLE SEVEN: LISTEN
63. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE WYLTIWLT PRINCIPLE SEVEN: LISTEN
64. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE INTERFACES AS CONVERSATION… DOES IT PASS THE WYLTIWLT TEST? ▸ Computer: Would you like to [x]? ▸ User: I would like to [x]. PRINCIPLE SEVEN: LISTEN From Jonathan Richards’s article “The Grammar of Interactivity” on UX Booth. http://www.uxbooth.com/articles/the-grammar-of-interactivity/
65. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE SEVEN: LISTEN From Jonathan Richards’s article “The Grammar of Interactivity” on UX Booth. http://www.uxbooth.com/articles/the-grammar-of-interactivity/
66. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE SEVEN: LISTEN
67. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE PRINCIPLE SEVEN: LISTEN Recover username Reset password
68. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 7. BE A GOOD LISTENER. ENCOURAGE OTHERS TO TALK ABOUT THEMSELVES. Dale Carnegie “The Golden Book” ➝ Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People ➝ Become a Friendlier Person PRINCIPLE SEVEN: LISTEN
69. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 8. TALK IN TERMS OF THE OTHER PERSON’S INTERESTS. Dale Carnegie “The Golden Book” ➝ Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People ➝ Become a Friendlier Person PRINCIPLE EIGHT: SPEAK OF THEIR INTERESTS
70. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE RUNKEEPER (IOS NOTIFICATION) PRINCIPLE EIGHT: SPEAK OF THEIR INTERESTS
71. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE FRESH BOOKS PRINCIPLE EIGHT: SPEAK OF THEIR INTERESTS
72. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 8. TALK IN TERMS OF THE OTHER PERSON’S INTERESTS. Dale Carnegie “The Golden Book” ➝ Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People ➝ Become a Friendlier Person PRINCIPLE EIGHT: SPEAK OF THEIR INTERESTS
73. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 9. MAKE THE OTHER PERSON FEEL IMPORTANT—AND DO IT SINCERELY. Dale Carnegie “The Golden Book” ➝ Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People ➝ Become a Friendlier Person PRINCIPLE NINE: MAKE THEM FEEL IMPORTANT
74. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE LYSOL (“HEALTHING” CAMPAIGN) PRINCIPLE NINE: MAKE THEM FEEL IMPORTANT
75. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE DUOLINGO PRINCIPLE NINE: MAKE THEM FEEL IMPORTANT
76. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE HOVER.COM PRINCIPLE NINE: MAKE THEM FEEL IMPORTANT
77. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 9. MAKE THE OTHER PERSON FEEL IMPORTANT—AND DO IT SINCERELY. Dale Carnegie “The Golden Book” ➝ Principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People ➝ Become a Friendlier Person PRINCIPLE NINE: MAKE THEM FEEL IMPORTANT
78. DEAR USER: LET’S BE FRIENDS @SCOTTKUBIE 9 Golden Principles 1. No criticism 2. Sincere appreciation 3. An eager want 4. Genuine interest 5. Smile 6. Use their name 7. Listen 8. Speak of their interests 9. Make them feel important