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Gerontophilia Considered Harmful
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John SJ Anderson
June 22, 2016
Programming
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190
Gerontophilia Considered Harmful
Lightning Talk from YAPC::NA::2016, as delivered by Mett Smeggin Troot
John SJ Anderson
June 22, 2016
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Transcript
Hi! Hi! My name is Mett Smeggin Troot!
my name is Hi! My name is Mett Smeggin Troot!
me+ smeggin troot Hi! My name is Mett Smeggin Troot!
mst? For some reason, I am constantly being confused for
another Perl person with same initials.
!mst This is annoying! I am not this MST person.
gerontophilia considered harmful Also, this talk title, this is all
wrong.
who is this geneheck? This speaker coordinator geneheck has messed
this all up
gerontoPERLia considered harmful no, my talk is "gerotoPERLia considered harmful"
what even is gerontoPERLia? what even is this?
using old Perl when you don't need to it is
using old perl when you don't have a reason to!
not interpreter version to be clear, i'm not really talking
about version of perl you use
solved problem. we can fix old perl interpreter problem, we
have the tools
use perlplbrewenv. solved! we have the technology.
language features no, i'm talking about language features.
maintaining backwards compaBbility i'm talking about fetishistically maintaining backward compatibility
with earlier versions of the language when you're using a more modern version
OH WAIT hold up.
are you on the toolchain gang? are you part of
the Perl toolchain gang?
i'm sorry. oh god I'm so sorry you have to
deal with that
thank you so much. also, thank you for all you
do. i appreciate it deeply.
everybody else? but the rest of you? not on toolchain
gang?
use new features! use new perl features already!
why? why is this important?
virtuous circle! because there's a feedback loop here
dev makes feature. feature gets used. dev is happy. dev
make more new feature. language gets be+er! everybody wins. ❤ {read slide}
alternaBve? if we don't do that, what happens?
dev makes feature. feature gets ignored. dev is sad. dev
leaves. language stagnates & dies. nobody wins. {read slide}
use new features! so use new features dammit
subrouBne signatures! use subroutine signatures
rjbs++ shout-out to rik for requiring 5.14 in new version
of Dzil this is a small but significant step in the right direction
trog++ and another shout out to trog for pioneering the
field of YAPC cosplay
mst++ and finally, a shout out to mst, who wasn't
able to be here this year. it didn't feel like YAPC without you, so i decided maybe you could _sort_ of be here after all...
thanks!