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My Fuck Up CV

My Fuck Up CV

Video available: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vuOQ1KDmrKs

"Over the last 10 years, I've gone from being a Comp Science student to a developer, to an agency owner, to an ecommerce evangelist. This has given me the opportunity to fuck up in a range of roles and responsibilities! All that practice means I've now gotten the hang of how to royally screw up a situation. So whether you want to overwrite production DBs, get removed from client Christmas card lists, or offer two for one hot tubs to all your client's customers, come and learn from the best in the business."

Talk given at the London Magento Meetup on 19th September 2018

Tom Robertshaw

September 19, 2018
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Transcript

  1. • Uniquely positioned to both: ◦ Take down a production

    site ◦ Registering a company limited by guarantee. Developer come business Person
  2. • With perl, everything looks like an opportunity to parse

    text. • Nick asked me to parse a MySQL backup • Picture me, proudly using perl to parse an SQL file. Perl ninja
  3. • First project was to finish another agency’s project. •

    I went through the outstanding tasks that they’d documented. • Agreed on a good price for the work. The Ghost work
  4. • Double your price Fridays • There’s no good answer

    to “Are you taking the piss”. Charge what you’re worth
  5. • We worked hard on a new site launch. •

    We followed our checklist. • Oh, except we’d blocked Google indexing. Attention to Detail
  6. • You have your principles • Then you have what

    the client wants • You have that angry email from a client. • And then you have a decision about how to respond. The customer is always right
  7. • Somehow, we won that client. • But things didn’t

    end there. Nothing but Professional
  8. • Paying the VAT bill twice. • Hiring too early/late.

    • Avoiding conflict and not having radical candor. • Getting worked up and galloping into conflict. • I know what I’m doing, I don’t need a code review. And plenty others
  9. • So many mistakes seem awful in the moment but

    hilarious after. • But not all. • Some are more expensive. Tragedy + Time = Comedy
  10. • I burnt myself trying to start a second company.

    • This lead to a bout of depression. • Through therapy I’ve learnt a lot more about myself BURNOUT
  11. • Not just about your credentials and companies on your

    CV. • A lot of mine has been about emotional intelligence. Professional Growth
  12. • All of this has made me wiser. • I

    want to make more mistakes. • Mistakes make life exciting. Make mistakes