The year is 2019 and there have never been more people writing functional Scala. We’ve grown tired of frameworks, magic (reflection) and omnipotent testing libraries with hundreds of testing styles. I want to fight back against tests that stop on the first failed assertion. Against beforeAll and afterEach. I want to seek vengeance for unexpected, globally configured test parallelism and flaky tests. I want to rethink how we test pure and effective functional code and show another approach to doing it in Scala. In this talk, I will share what I’ve learned trying to make that approach become a reality. We’ll talk about the characteristics of test frameworks, functional API design and making trade-offs.