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3-1 Introduction to Obstacles

3-1 Introduction to Obstacles

More Decks by Patricia Sung | Motherhood in ADHD


  1. Module 3-1_ Intro to Obstacles Wed, Apr 27, 2022 9:29AM

    4:52 SUMMARY KEYWORDS unrealistic standards, obstacles, work, talk, bathroom, expect, potty, day, adhd, road trips, teach, total overhaul, overcome, calendar, moment, kid, improving, snowball effect, solving, train SPEAKERS Patricia Sung Patricia Sung 00:00 Hello there, Successful Mama's welcome back to module three of how to keep a calendar for ADHD mamas. Take a moment and put away anything that's distracting when you're going on vibrate. Let's go ahead and jump in for our lesson. We're on Lesson three here, which is overcoming our ADHD obstacles. Patricia Sung 00:26 All right. So our obstacles, we have a lot of those. So this will be a lengthier discussion. But I want to make sure that we look at all the things that we could possibly expect to come along, there's always going to be stuff that surprises us in our day with being a mom. That's a kid's role. So if we can think about ahead of time, what's coming? And what is our proposed plan of how we can overcome that we're far more likely to overcome that in the moment than if we're just flying by the seat of our pants, which I mean, admittedly, we are fairly good at. But it does take a toll on our sanity. Patricia Sung 01:09 So when we talk about improving ourselves with our calendars, I want you to think about when you're learning something, when you're improving yourself, I want you to think about potty training your kids, when we potty train our kids, we do not expect them to get it on the first day. I mean, we sure wish they did. But that's not our expectation, we know that is going to be several days of teaching them how to listen to their bodies, and how to actually to do it correctly. How do we wash our hands? How do we not get pee all over the bathroom? Patricia Sung 01:39 Like there's a lot of steps in that there's a time that we're going to expect that to take. And even though we teach them like I did the 3d method with my boys, and with one of them he got
  2. on the first day. And the next two were just

    solidifying the other one was like the last minute, three that I was gonna lose. But we did it in the three days, right? And we're like, Yay, is funny train. But from there, I don't expect on day four. Like, I don't have to do anything that I'm just like, cool. They got it. And that's it. No, when I look at day four, and day five, I'm still saying, Tell me what if you have to go buddy, tell me to go potty. Everything in the potty. Patricia Sung 02:21 Before we go. We all go panic, forget the car, you're still doing that when your kid is five, and you're still telling everybody to go to the bathroom on road trips when they're older. Like there's not this end date of potty training. I mean, you know, probably like by you know, high school, we're gonna do that. But that's not like a set amount of time, we want to think about that same thing with ourselves, we want to have that same mindset. We are not going to get this on day one or two or three, that this is something we're constantly going to be working on. And eventually Yes, we get to high school and we don't have to have our mom tell us how to go the bathroom. Right? We will get there. But it's not an overnight process. So move my talking head. Patricia Sung 03:02 So here is coming at me down here that we are looking for progress, not perfection, we are looking for baby steps and not total overhaul, we are not going to scrap everything we ever did and start from scratch because that's not going to stick. We want to do small changes as we go. Little by little we will get there and we will create this snowball effect that the more that we work on it, the better we get with it, we get more momentum and it gets easier and easier as that snowball, you know, heads down the hill faster. We'll get there to a point where it's easy, but we want to go in knowing that it's not going to be an overnight thing. It's not going to be automatic, we are going to work at it. And we will get there eventually. Patricia Sung 03:51 Now, when we talk about obstacles, we need to remind ourselves that everybody has obstacles. I think a lot of times we push ourselves to these unrealistic standards. And we think that nobody has obstacles, it's just us. And then we push ourselves to these like crazy unrealistic standards. Because we are beating ourselves up for the times that it didn't work. We're so used to messing up that we're trying to strive for so much like greed or an improvement to somehow make up for what we didn't do. It's a that's a whole can of worms I won't get too far into but we are humans. We are not robots. Patricia Sung 04:28 So there is going to be a part that is hard along the way. And we can prepare for those things that are different. We can prepare for those things that we expect. And I'm going to pause there and we'll talk about our creative problem solving skills in our next video.