PHP Kitchen Nightmares

Remember the Kitchen Nightmares TV show? Chef Ramsay visiting restaurants that are struggling, and telling them how to improve, but in the process you see all the bad things happening? Let's head into our development kitchen and look at things that can go wrong, and figure out how to improve.

Transcript

1. PHP Kitchen Nightmares “CHEF” STEFAN KOOPMANSCHAP
2. Me PHP since late 90’s Ingewikkeld since 2011 Worked with (and without) many frameworks and tools Really started liking cooking Looked inside a lot of kitchens
4. Keep the kitchen clean
6. Is your kitchen clean? How much technical debt do you have? How often do you update your dependencies? Are you using unsupported versions of PHP, libraries and frameworks?
8. Let’s clean the kitchen: Technical debt The scout rule: Leave things cleaner than you found them For bigger things: Create separate refactoring tasks for your team Get yourself some help: Use tools such as Rector (https://getrector.org)
9. Let’s clean the kitchen: Dependencies Evaluate your dependencies on a regular basis and update (Smaller updates are easier than large updates) Use the security checker to scan for security issues: https://github.com/fabpot/local-php- security-checker
10. Let’s clean the kitchen: Versions Keep track of the versions and upgrade to supported versions Make sure you’re always on a supported version to prevent surprises Plan for these situations Again: Rector may help (https://getrector.org)
11. Use the right tools
13. The right tools Don’t pin yourself down on a single tool Always research other tools that might be better or more suited to your project Not sure? Try!
15. Listen to the customer OR YOUR OWN TEAM
17. The customer is always right This is not what you want to hear It is what you need to hear Work on your communication skills Listen. Really, listen.
18. Your colleague is always right This is not really true They’re just like your customer Don’t assume, ask Communication, communication, communication
20. Know the law
22. The law is always right You have a responsibility On different levels Speak up
24. Use your good taste DON’T JUST FOLLOW THE RECIPE
26. On using recipes There is nothing wrong with recipes Evaluate your recipes Make sure you have the right recipe Be creative
28. Keep it simple
30. Simple? What was the last time you created a simple PHP script? When you create a new project, how do you start? When you deploy your application, where do you deploy it to?
31. Simple! We have the tendency to overcomplicate stuff There’s a time and place for experiment and research. Maybe not now Start simple, expand on that
33. Keep your knowledge up to date
35. Don’t get stuck Keep on learning Things change Make a plan
36. Evaluate Where am I now? Where do I want to be? How do I get there?
38. Concluding Keep your kitchen clean Use the right tools Listen to the customer and your team Know the law Use your good taste Keep it simple Stay up-to-date
39. Thank you @SKOOP@PHPC.SOCIAL ON MASTODON STEFAN@INGEWIKKELD.NET
40. Credits All video material: Channel 5 / ITV Knife photo: Savernake Knifes (Unsplash) Gordon Ramsay: by-nc BreakingTravelNews (Flickr)