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Your Emotional API: How to be a better developer by being a better human v2

Your Emotional API: How to be a better developer by being a better human v2

Feelings are messy and uncomfortable, so why can't you just ignore them? Because it doesn’t work; you’ll write substandard code and be a suboptimal teammate.

Research shows that emotional regulation skills have a significant impact on your job performance. In this talk you’ll learn how emotions are affecting your work and what you can do about it.

I use the metaphor of an API as a way to talk about how your emotional system functions. We’ll go over some of the code in your emotional API, and how we can refactor it.

This will improve your coding, your relationships, and the arc of your career.

Emotional API

May 19, 2017
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  1. Your Emotional API
    How to be a better developer by being a better human
    Self Conference
    v2

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  2. @emotionalAPI
    John Sawers
    Founder and CTO of Data Simply
    Senior Developer at Privia Health
    @emotionalapi
    @johnksawers
    http://emotionalapi.com
    he/his/him

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  3. “Emotions just make so much sense to me”
    — No One Ever

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  4. @emotionalAPI
    • Cry
    • Make a Scene
    • Whine
    • Yell
    Don’t

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  5. @emotionalAPI
    Do

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  6. @emotionalAPI
    We’re on our own

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  7. “Trying not to feel something
    doesn’t work, and in some cases
    even backfires”
    David Rock
    Your Brain At Work[11]

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  8. Better Human?
    @emotionalAPI

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  9. @emotionalAPI
    Better Developer?

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  10. @emotionalAPI
    post '/feels/anger' do

    ...

    end

    post '/feels/sadness' do

    ...

    end

    post '/feels/fear' do

    ...

    end

    post '/feels/shame' do

    ...

    end

    post '/feels/joy' do

    ...

    end

    post '/feels/love' do

    ...

    end

    Endpoints

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  11. @emotionalAPI
    Aliases
    delete '/job/12', 301: '/feels/sadness'

    put '/events/mother/visit', 301: '/feels/anger'

    put '/baby/new', 301: '/feels/fear'

    post '/people/co-worker/comments/jerk', 301: '/feels/anger'

    get '/people/boss/compliment', 301: '/feels/pride

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  12. @emotionalAPI
    Methods
    delete '/job/:id'

    100.times do

    Thread.new(post('/feels/fear')

    end

    20.times do

    Thread.new(post('/feels/sadness')

    end

    end

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  13. @emotionalAPI
    It Is A Public API
    The Bad News

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  14. “But feelings are icky, and I don’t wanna”
    — You, probably

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  15. @emotionalAPI
    Coding Solo

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  16. @emotionalAPI
    Cognitive Problems

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  17. @emotionalAPI
    Cognitive Problems
    • Poorer Executive Function [1]

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  18. @emotionalAPI
    Cognitive Problems
    • Poorer Executive Function [1]
    • Poorer Short Term Memory [2]

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  19. @emotionalAPI
    Cognitive Problems
    • Poorer Executive Function [1]
    • Poorer Short Term Memory [2]
    • Lower ability to handle stress and cope with crisis [3]

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  20. @emotionalAPI
    Cognitive & Health Benefits
    • “not just in improved behavior but in measurable academic
    achievement.”[5]
    • “measurable health advantage”[9]

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  21. @emotionalAPI
    Coding Together

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  22. @emotionalAPI
    Cognitive Problems
    • More self-centered [4]

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  23. @emotionalAPI
    Cognitive & Social Benefits
    • “Subjects made to feel powerful judged emotional expression
    more accurately.”[7]

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  24. @emotionalAPI
    Cognitive & Social Benefits
    • “Subjects made to feel powerful judged emotional expression
    more accurately.”[7]
    • Help others with their emotional challenges

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  25. @emotionalAPI
    Cognitive & Social Benefits
    • “Subjects made to feel powerful judged emotional expression
    more accurately.”[7]
    • Help others with their emotional challenges
    • Empathy!

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  26. @emotionalAPI
    Cognitive & Social Benefits
    • “Subjects made to feel powerful judged emotional expression
    more accurately.”[7]
    • Help others with their emotional challenges
    • Empathy!
    • Better career advancement[8]

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  27. @emotionalAPI
    Degraded Cognition

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  28. @emotionalAPI
    Advocate for Ideas

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  29. @emotionalAPI
    Code Reviews

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  30. @emotionalAPI
    Distraction

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  31. @emotionalAPI
    Problematic Teammates

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  32. @emotionalAPI
    Impostor Syndrome

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  33. @emotionalAPI
    Interviewed, Hired, Fired

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  34. @emotionalAPI
    Manage & Mentor

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  35. http://frontside.io/
    Senior
    Software
    Developer

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  36. Soft Skills
    Super Hard Skills

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  37. @emotionalAPI
    Level 1: Conceptual Tools
    Level 2: On Your Own
    Level 3: With Someone Else
    Level 4: With a Group

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  38. @emotionalAPI
    Level 1
    Conceptual Tools

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  39. @emotionalAPI
    You Control The Implementation

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  40. @emotionalAPI
    You can control where and
    when you express your feelings
    (But you don’t have to)

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  41. @emotionalAPI
    get('/feels/anger').perform_later

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  42. @emotionalAPI
    They Don’t Mean Anything

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  43. @emotionalAPI
    Fear of Loss of Control

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  44. @emotionalAPI
    Feelings are Enumerable, not
    Boolean

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  45. @emotionalAPI
    There Is No Should

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  46. @emotionalAPI
    Level 2
    On Your Own

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  47. @emotionalAPI
    Rubber
    Duck
    Debugging

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  48. @emotionalAPI
    Talking
    “…consciously recognizing the
    emotions reduced their
    impact.”
    David Rock
    Your Brain At Work[10]

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  49. @emotionalAPI
    Try Lots
    of Words

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  50. @emotionalAPI
    “I feel” vs. “I am”

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  51. @emotionalAPI
    Emotional
    Retro

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  52. @emotionalAPI
    Move Your Body

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  53. @emotionalAPI
    Move Your Body
    Dancing • Singing • Exercise

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  54. @emotionalAPI
    Level 3
    With Another Person

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  55. @emotionalAPI
    Talking

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  56. @emotionalAPI
    Feel first

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  57. @emotionalAPI
    Feel first

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  58. @emotionalAPI
    Emotional Mentorship

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  59. @emotionalAPI
    Open Sourcing Mental Illness is
    a campaign founded by Ed
    Finkler to change how we deal
    with mental health in the tech
    community.
    https://osmihelp.org/
    @OSMIhelp

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  60. @emotionalAPI
    Level 4
    With A Group

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  61. @emotionalAPI
    How did I get here?
    “…an intensive 20-hr Weekend Retreat in which you will
    explore your erroneous belief systems, learn to
    appropriately express emotions in a manner that heals…”
    Purpose • Passion • Peace
    http://aliceamos.me/p3retreat/

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  62. @emotionalAPI
    Me

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  63. @emotionalAPI
    GET '/events/something/trivial'

    POST ‘/feels/anger'

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  64. @emotionalAPI
    Do

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  65. @emotionalAPI
    Safe Space

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  66. @emotionalAPI
    Throw A Fit

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  67. @emotionalAPI
    Throw A Fit

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  68. @emotionalAPI
    delete ‘/v5/parents/marriage’


    post ‘/v6/parents/:dad_id/set_emotional_distance/1000’


    post ‘/v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer’


    delete ‘/v17/parents/:dad_id’

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  69. @emotionalAPI
    /v5
    delete ‘/v5/parents/marriage’ do

    20.times.do {

    Thread.new(get('/feels/fear'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/blame'))

    }

    delete('/feels/self_worth')

    end

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  70. @emotionalAPI
    /v8
    post /v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer do

    20.times.do {

    Thread.new(delete('/v5/parents/marriage'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/fear'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness'))

    }

    end

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  71. @emotionalAPI
    /v17
    def ‘/v17/parents/:dad_id’ do

    1000.times.do {

    Thread.new(post('/v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer'))

    Thread.new(delete('/v5/parents/marriage'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/anger'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness'))

    }

    end

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  72. @emotionalAPI
    Stack Trace
    NoMethodError - undefined method `paternal_approval’ for BossClass:
    /me/feels/panic.rb:9:in `initialize'
    /me/feels/love/daddy:14:in `none_for_you’
    /me/feels/fear/mistake/guaranteed_to_be_fired:21:in `realize_mistake’
    /me/events/releases/prod/bug_count/metrics.rb:39:in `count_bugs’

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  73. @emotionalAPI
    Stack Trace
    NoMethodError - undefined method `paternal_approval’ for BossClass:
    /me/feels/panic.rb:9:in `initialize'
    /me/feels/love/daddy:14:in `none_for_you’
    /me/feels/fear/mistake/guaranteed_to_be_fired:21:in `realize_mistake’
    /me/events/releases/prod/bug_count/metrics.rb:39:in `count_bugs’

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  74. “Crying doesn’t indicate you are
    weak, since birth it has always
    been a sign to indicate you are
    alive”
    — attributed to Charlotte Brontë

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  75. @emotionalAPI
    /v17
    def ‘/v17/parents/:dad_id’ do

    1000.times.do {

    Thread.new(post('/v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer'))

    Thread.new(delete('/v5/parents/marriage'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/anger'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness'))

    }

    end

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  76. @emotionalAPI
    Diff
    def ‘/v17/parents/:dad_id’ do

    1000.times.do {
    500.times.do {

    Thread.new(post('/v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer'))

    Thread.new(delete('/v5/parents/marriage'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/anger'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness'))

    }

    end

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  77. @emotionalAPI
    Diff
    get ‘/me/events/releases/prod/bugs/count_high’ do

    Thread.new(get('/feels/unloved'))

    Thread.new(get('/feels/panic'))

    puts 'oops'

    fix_it

    move_on

    end

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  78. @emotionalAPI
    Baggage

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  79. @emotionalAPI
    The Ultimate Goal

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  80. @emotionalAPI
    Best Practices

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  81. @emotionalAPI
    Pick One Thing

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  82. @emotionalAPI
    Compassion

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  83. @emotionalAPI
    Thank You So Much
    Mailing List: http://emotionalapi.com
    Twitter: @emotionalAPI

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  84. @emotionalAPI
    Come get a feeling wheel!
    I’d love to hear what your ‘one
    thing’ is

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  85. @emotionalAPI
    References
    [1],[2] “…a lack of power impairs our cognitive function.’ Amy Cuddy, Presence 119
    [3] “In fact, people who have a high sense of personal control…cope significantly better in crisis…because their executive
    functions are intact” Amy Cuddy, Presence, 136
    [4] “Powerlessness makes us self-absorbed” Amy Cuddy, Presence 121
    [5] “Helping children improve their self-awareness and confidence, manage their disturbing emotional impulses and increase
    their empathy pays off not just in improved behavior but in measurable academic achievement.” — Daniel Goleman,
    Emotional Intelligence xi
    [6] “The [people who feel] powerful process information more abstractly, integrating information to extract the gist, detecting
    patterns and relationships” Smith, P.K., Dijkterhuis, A, & Wigbuldus, D.H. Psychology Science, 19, 1258-1259
    [7] “Subjects made to feel powerful judged emotional expression more accurately.” Amy Cuddy, Presence 127
    [8] “…having high leadership potential were far stronger in EI competencies…” Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence xiii
    [9] “Those who can mange their emotional lives with more calm and self-awareness … have … distinct and measurable
    health advantage … confirmed by many studies” Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence xi
    [10] “…when they were asked to name the emotion, the ventrolateral prefrontal cortex activated and reduced the emotional
    amygdala reactivity. In other words, consciously recognizing the emotions reduced their impact.” David Rock, Your Brain At
    Work 127
    [11] Gross found that people who tried to suppress a negative emotional experience failed to do so. While they thought they
    looked fine outwardly, inwardly their limbic system was just as aroused as without suppression. Trying not to feel something
    doesn’t work, and in some cases even backfires. David Rock, Your Brain At Work 119

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