Upgrade to Pro — share decks privately, control downloads, hide ads and more …

Your Emotional API - Lightning Version

Your Emotional API - Lightning Version

Feelings are messy and uncomfortable, why don’t we just ignore them? Because ignoring them destroys our ability to code. We can’t think as well. Increasing emotional mastery can have huge impacts on our careers and productivity. We’ll talk theory and practice for healthy emotions.

Emotional API

May 06, 2016

More Decks by Emotional API

Other Decks in Programming


  1. Your Emotional API
    How to be a better developer by being a better human
    ⚡ Lightning Version ⚡

    …and now for something completely different.

    I’m here to talk about emotions, and how they can affect you as a developer.

    View Slide

  2. John Sawers
    CTO and Co-Founder at Data Simply
    Architect at Privia Health
    I’m John Sawers

    I’m the CTO and Co-founder of Data Simply

    And the Architect at Privia Health

    This is where to find me online.

    View Slide

  3. Emotions just make so
    much sense to me
    —No One Ever
    Given the fact that almost no one understands emotions,

    I want see what we can learn by modeling our emotional system as an API

    View Slide

  4. @emotionalAPI
    post ‘/feels/anger’ do
    post ‘/feels/sadness’ do
    post ‘/feels/fear’ do
    post ‘/feels/shame’ do
    post ‘/feels/joy’ do
    post ‘/feels/love’ do
    Here are our core API endpoints.

    They handle all our basic emotions.

    View Slide

  5. @emotionalAPI
    It’s not that simple
    delete /job/1, 301: /feels/sadness
    put /events/mother/visit, 301: /feels/anger
    put /baby/new, 301: /feels/fear
    post /people/co-worker/comments/asshole, 301: /feels/anger
    get /people/boss/compliment, 301: /feels/pride
    There are hundreds or thousands of aliases that redirect to those core endpoints

    Things like losing a job, or having a baby can really hit you massively.

    View Slide

  6. @emotionalAPI
    It’s not even that simple
    delete /job/:id
    100.times do
    20.times do
    Method bodies can be complex and trigger massive traffic to that core API as well.

    And there’s some bad news.

    View Slide

  7. The Bad News:
    It’s a public API
    Any person, event or situation can call any of these endpoints at any time.

    View Slide

  8. The Good News:
    You have complete control over implementation
    How you react to a feeling is up to you. But it takes work to undo habitual responses.

    First, let’s talk about how your feeling server works in general.

    View Slide

  9. @emotionalAPI
    How Your Feeling Server Works
    Content-Type: feels
    Content-Length: ∞
    (hint, not very well)
    When one of the endpoints is hit, the download starts, but the server is flaky and cannot tell the size of the payload.

    As a feeling is happening to you, it seems like it will go on forever.

    View Slide

  10. When The Big Feels Hit
    Many of us have had the experience when a big feel comes in, that if we let it out, it will never stop.

    If I express this anger, I will never stop yelling. If I express this sadness, I will never stop crying.

    But here’s the thing

    View Slide

  11. @emotionalAPI
    20 Minutes Max
    Experts and my own experience have shown that feelings only last 20 minutes.

    If you express the feeling at 100% intensity it’ll be gone in 20 mins or less.

    View Slide

  12. @emotionalAPI
    You don’t have to,
    But you can control where
    and when you express
    your feelings
    So, when do we do this ‘100% expression’ ?

    We get to decide, because we have a queue

    View Slide

  13. @emotionalAPI
    Our delayed_job system, allows us to choose the right time and place.

    View Slide

  14. @emotionalAPI
    Safe Space
    • Alone in your house
    • In the wilderness
    • With a safe person
    We can do it alone or with a supportive partner.

    So, what does expressing these feelings look like?

    I’ll give you a few examples, but there’s much more to it.

    View Slide

  15. @emotionalAPI
    • Throw a fit
    • Move your body
    • Say the words you’re dying to say:
    • “I feel so angry that…”
    Let’s start with anger, which is usually the easiest to start with.

    Toddlers are brilliant at this - they just lay down and kick and scream and cry. They’re done in 5 minutes.

    Use your voice and body to get the energy of it out of your body.

    To get started try saying “I feel so angry about…”

    View Slide

  16. @emotionalAPI
    • Shudder and shake
    • Cry
    • Say the words you’re dying to say:
    • “I feel so afraid that…”
    Again, physical movement is key, but different.

    Even if nobody is with you, say the words that describe the feeling

    View Slide

  17. @emotionalAPI
    One thing is for sure
    You will feel incredibly stupid when you first try any
    of these things.
    You will feel like a Class A idiot when you start doing these things.

    Because we’re often so go good at avoiding feelings, the trick is to start doing those actions before you feel it.

    But keep going and it’ll come.

    View Slide

  18. @emotionalAPI
    That sounds really messy
    Why bother with all of this?

    View Slide

  19. @emotionalAPI
    Cognitive Problems
    • Poorer Executive Function
    • Poorer Short Term Memory
    • Lower ability to handle stress
    Unprocessed feelings make us feel powerless, and feeling powerless affects our thinking.

    When we handle feelings well we feel powerful, and we reverse these deficits.

    View Slide

  20. @emotionalAPI
    Social Benefits
    • Empathy!
    • Express your ideas better, without baggage
    • Help others with their emotional challenges
    By making your self better at feels, you make everyone
    around you better at it.
    If you know your own feelings, you’ll be able to understand other’s feelings

    You can choose how your own feelings affect your life and the lives of others. You can choose constructive responses, not
    habitual ones.

    View Slide

  21. Better Developer?
    What do I mean by better developer?

    If you’re emotional state isn’t affecting your cognition

    If you’re not distracted by difficult family situations

    If you can handle problematic team mates

    If you can banish your impostor syndrome

    If you can handle hiring, firing and job interviews, giving talks

    You will be a better developer and a better team mate

    View Slide

  22. Better Human?
    What do I mean by better human?

    What I mean by this is that you become better at being a human. You’re going to have emotions, you cannot avoid it. So why not get better at it?

    When you do - everything gets better.

    View Slide

  23. @emotionalAPI
    Thank You
    I’m just scratching the surface of all of this
    • Mailing List: http://emotionalapi.com
    • Twitter: @emotionalAPI
    • Talk to me in the hall!

    View Slide

  24. @emotionalAPI
    I’ll be giving the full version of this talk at the
    Abstractions conference.
    August 18-20 in Pittsburgh PA

    View Slide