Hacking Your Emotional API

Hacking Your Emotional API

Being a good developer isn't just about slinging code; we're part of a community. Interacting with others in a community means feelings are involved.

But feelings are messy and uncomfortable, so why can't you just ignore them? Because emotional skills are critical for working well on a team, and for writing code every day.

In this talk you’ll learn how emotions are affecting you by modeling them as an API and looking at the code.

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Emotional API

April 20, 2018
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Transcript

  1. Welcome

  2. Welcome

  3. Your Emotional API How to be a better developer by

    being a better human v2.5
  4. @emotionalAPI John Sawers Founder and CTO of Data Simply Senior

    Developer at Privia Health @emotionalapi @johnksawers http://emotionalapi.com he/his/him
  5. “Emotions just make so much sense to me” — No

    One Ever
  6. @emotionalAPI • Cry • Make a Scene • Whine •

    Yell Don’t
  7. @emotionalAPI Do • • • •

  8. @emotionalAPI We’re on our own

  9. Endpoints @emotionalAPI

  10. Middleware @emotionalAPI delete /job/12 put /events/mother/visit put /baby/new post /people/co-worker/insult

    get /people/boss/compliment /feels/sadness
 /feels/anger
 /feels/fear
 /feels/anger
 /feels/pride Senses Wetware Inputs
  11. Middleware @emotionalAPI delete /job/12 put /events/mother/visit put /baby/new post /people/co-worker/insult

    get /people/boss/compliment /feels/love
 /feels/anger
 /feels/fear
 /feels/shame
 /feels/pride Senses Wetware Inputs
  12. Methods delete '/job/:id'
 100.times do
 Thread.new(post('/feels/fear')
 end
 20.times do
 Thread.new(post('/feels/sadness')


    end
 end @emotionalAPI
  13. @emotionalAPI A Public API The Bad News

  14. Decomposability @emotionalAPI

  15. “But feelings are icky, and I don’t wanna” — You,

    probably
  16. “Trying not to feel something doesn’t work, and in some

    cases even backfires” David Rock Your Brain At Work[11]
  17. @emotionalAPI Coding Solo

  18. @emotionalAPI Cognitive Problems

  19. @emotionalAPI Cognitive Problems • Poorer Executive Function [1]

  20. @emotionalAPI Cognitive Problems • Poorer Executive Function [1] • Poorer

    Short Term Memory [2]
  21. @emotionalAPI Cognitive Problems • Poorer Executive Function [1] • Poorer

    Short Term Memory [2] • Lower ability to handle stress and cope with crisis [3]
  22. @emotionalAPI Cognitive & Health Benefits • “…not just in improved

    behavior but in measurable academic achievement.”[5] • “…measurable health advantage”[9]
  23. @emotionalAPI Coding Together

  24. @emotionalAPI Cognitive & Social Benefits • “Subjects made to feel

    powerful judged emotional expression more accurately.”[7]
  25. @emotionalAPI Cognitive & Social Benefits • “Subjects made to feel

    powerful judged emotional expression more accurately.”[7] • Better career advancement[8]
  26. @emotionalAPI Cognitive & Social Benefits • “Subjects made to feel

    powerful judged emotional expression more accurately.”[7] • Better career advancement[8] • Less self-centered [4] • Empathy!
  27. Scenarios

  28. @emotionalAPI Degraded Cognition

  29. @emotionalAPI Advocate for Ideas

  30. @emotionalAPI Code Reviews

  31. @emotionalAPI Distraction

  32. @emotionalAPI Problematic Teammates

  33. @emotionalAPI Impostor Syndrome

  34. @emotionalAPI Interviewed, Hired, Fired

  35. @emotionalAPI Manage & Mentor

  36. http://frontside.io/ Senior Software Developer

  37. Toolkit

  38. @emotionalAPI Level 1: Conceptual Tools Level 2: On Your Own

    Level 3: With Someone Else Level 4: With a Group
  39. @emotionalAPI Level 1 Conceptual Tools

  40. @emotionalAPI You Control The Implementation

  41. @emotionalAPI You can control where and when you express your

    feelings (But you don’t have to)
  42. @emotionalAPI get('/feels/anger').perform_later

  43. @emotionalAPI They Don’t Mean Anything

  44. @emotionalAPI Fear of Loss of Control

  45. @emotionalAPI Feelings are Enumerable, not Boolean Anger Disgust Shame

  46. @emotionalAPI There Is No Should

  47. @emotionalAPI “Even if it feels bad, it’s ok to let

    it feel bad. Eventually you’ll stop feeling bad because feelings just don’t last very long” Amy Cuddy Presence[13]
  48. @emotionalAPI Level 2 On Your Own

  49. @emotionalAPI Move Your Body

  50. @emotionalAPI Move Your Body Dancing • Singing • Exercise

  51. @emotionalAPI Rubber Duck Debugging

  52. @emotionalAPI “…consciously recognizing the emotions reduced their impact.” David Rock

    Your Brain At Work[10]
  53. @emotionalAPI Yup, talking

  54. @emotionalAPI The Feel Wheel[12]

  55. @emotionalAPI “I feel” vs. “I am”

  56. @emotionalAPI Emotional Retro

  57. @emotionalAPI Level 3 With Another Person

  58. @emotionalAPI Again, Talking

  59. @emotionalAPI Feel first

  60. @emotionalAPI Bring In A Consultant

  61. @emotionalAPI Level 4 With A Group

  62. @emotionalAPI How did I get here? “…an intensive 20-hr Weekend

    Retreat in which you will explore your erroneous belief systems, learn to appropriately express emotions in a manner that heals…” Purpose • Passion • Peace http://aliceamos.me/p3retreat/
  63. GET /feels/

  64. @emotionalAPI As a child I wasn’t allowed to get angry

  65. @emotionalAPI Do • • • •

  66. @emotionalAPI Safe Space

  67. @emotionalAPI Throw A Fit

  68. @emotionalAPI Throw A Fit

  69. GET /feels/

  70. @emotionalAPI delete /v5/parents/marriage
 
 post /v6/parents/:dad_id/set_emotional_distance/1000
 
 post /v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer
 


    delete /v17/parents/:dad_id
  71. @emotionalAPI /v5 delete /v5/parents/marriage do
 20.times.do {
 Thread.new(get('/feels/fear'))
 Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness'))
 Thread.new(get('/feels/blame'))


    }
 delete('/feels/self_worth')
 end
  72. @emotionalAPI /v8 post /v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer do
 20.times.do {
 Thread.new(delete('/v5/parents/marriage'))
 Thread.new(get('/feels/fear'))
 Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness'))


    }
 end
  73. @emotionalAPI /v17 def /v17/parents/:dad_id do
 1000.times.do {
 Thread.new(post('/v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer'))
 Thread.new(delete('/v5/parents/marriage'))
 Thread.new(get('/feels/anger'))


    Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness'))
 }
 end
  74. @emotionalAPI Stack Trace NoMethodError - undefined method `paternal_approval’ for BossClass:

    /me/feels/panic.rb:9:in `initialize' /me/feels/love/daddy:14:in `none_for_you’ /me/feels/fear/mistake/guaranteed_to_be_fired:21:in `realize_mistake’ /me/events/releases/prod/bug_count/metrics.rb:39:in `count_bugs’
  75. @emotionalAPI Stack Trace NoMethodError - undefined method `paternal_approval’ for BossClass:

    /me/feels/panic.rb:9:in `initialize' /me/feels/love/daddy:14:in `none_for_you’ /me/feels/fear/mistake/guaranteed_to_be_fired:21:in `realize_mistake’ /me/events/releases/prod/bug_count/metrics.rb:39:in `count_bugs’
  76. “Crying doesn’t indicate you are weak, since birth it has

    always been a sign to indicate you are alive” — attributed to Charlotte Brontë
  77. @emotionalAPI /v17 def /v17/parents/:dad_id do
 1000.times.do {
 Thread.new(post('/v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer'))
 Thread.new(delete('/v5/parents/marriage'))
 Thread.new(get('/feels/anger'))


    Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness'))
 }
 end
  78. @emotionalAPI Diff def /v17/parents/:dad_id do
 1000.times.do { 500.times.do {
 Thread.new(post('/v8/parents/:dad_id/diseases/cancer'))


    Thread.new(delete('/v5/parents/marriage'))
 Thread.new(get('/feels/anger'))
 Thread.new(get('/feels/sadness'))
 }
 end
  79. @emotionalAPI Diff get /me/events/releases/prod/bugs/count_high do
 Thread.new(get('/feels/unloved'))
 Thread.new(get('/feels/panic'))
 puts 'oops'
 fix_it


    move_on
 end
  80. @emotionalAPI Baggage

  81. @emotionalAPI The Ultimate Goal

  82. Soft Skills Super Hard Skills

  83. @emotionalAPI Best Practices

  84. @emotionalAPI Pick One Thing

  85. @emotionalAPI Compassion

  86. DEEP BREATH

  87. @emotionalAPI Thank You So Much Slides: https://speakerdeck.com/johnksawers/hacking-your-emotional-api-v2-dot-5 Videos: http://emotionalapi.com Twitter:

    @emotionalAPI Come get a feel wheel!
  88. @emotionalAPI References [1],[2] “…a lack of power impairs our cognitive

    function.’ Amy Cuddy, Presence 119 [3] “In fact, people who have a high sense of personal control…cope significantly better in crisis…because their executive functions are intact” Amy Cuddy, Presence, 136 [4] “Powerlessness makes us self-absorbed” Amy Cuddy, Presence 121 [5] “Helping children improve their self-awareness and confidence, manage their disturbing emotional impulses and increase their empathy pays off not just in improved behavior but in measurable academic achievement.” — Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence xi [6] “The [people who feel] powerful process information more abstractly, integrating information to extract the gist, detecting patterns and relationships” Smith, P.K., Dijkterhuis, A, & Wigbuldus, D.H. Psychology Science, 19, 1258-1259 [7] “Subjects made to feel powerful judged emotional expression more accurately.” Amy Cuddy, Presence 127 [8] “…having high leadership potential were far stronger in EI competencies…” Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence xiii [9] “Those who can mange their emotional lives with more calm and self-awareness … have … distinct and measurable health advantage … confirmed by many studies” Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence xi [10] “…when they were asked to name the emotion, the ventrolateral prefrontal cortex activated and reduced the emotional amygdala reactivity. In other words, consciously recognizing the emotions reduced their impact.” David Rock, Your Brain At Work 127 [11] Gross found that people who tried to suppress a negative emotional experience failed to do so. While they thought they looked fine outwardly, inwardly their limbic system was just as aroused as without suppression. Trying not to feel something doesn’t work, and in some cases even backfires. David Rock, Your Brain At Work 119 [12] The Feeling Wheel http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/036215378201200411