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You should not become a developer

Paul Ardeleanu
November 12, 2016
Technology
0
180

You should not become a developer

In this talk Paul will have a go at explaining the following anecdote:

A software developer is going to the store and her partner tells her, "Buy a bottle of milk, and if there are eggs, buy a dozen." So she goes, buys everything, and drives back to the house. Upon arrival, her partner angrily asks her, "Why did you get 13 bottle of milk?" The programmer says, "There were eggs!"

Paul Ardeleanu

November 12, 2016
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Transcript

  1. “But I don’t want to go among mad people," Alice remarked.
    "Oh, you can’t help that," said the Cat: "we’re all mad here. 

    I’m mad. You’re mad."
    "How do you know I’m mad?" said Alice.
    "You must be," said the Cat, or you wouldn’t have come here.”
    

    Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

    View Slide

  2. You should not
    become a developer
    Paul Ardeleanu
    @pardel

    View Slide

  3. You should NOT
    become a developer
    Paul Ardeleanu
    @pardel

    View Slide

  4. A software developer is going to the store and her partner tells her: 

    ”Buy a bottle of milk, and if there are eggs, buy a dozen."
    So she goes, buys everything, and drives back to the house.
    Upon arrival, her partner angrily asks her:
    ”Why did you get 13 bottles of milk?" 

    The programmer says, "There were eggs!"

    View Slide

  5. View Slide

  6. Don’t try this at home

    View Slide

  7. https://www.flickr.com/photos/nicholasjon/4498088305

    View Slide

  8. View Slide

  9. View Slide

  10. Context

    View Slide

  11. Who are you?

    View Slide

  12. Why are you here today?

    View Slide

  13. Who am I?

    View Slide

  14. https://www.flickr.com/photos/cod_gabriel/2149613466

    View Slide

  15. Unknown author but… Thank you!

    View Slide

  16. Title Text

    View Slide

  17. https://www.flickr.com/photos/simici/2188919061

    View Slide

  18. View Slide

  19. https://www.flickr.com/photos/telwink/3797070188

    View Slide

  20. https://www.flickr.com/photos/[email protected]/9197011039

    View Slide

  21. View Slide

  22. https://www.flickr.com/photos/snebtorlife/5165020361

    View Slide

  23. https://www.flickr.com/photos/bensutherland/3302494365/

    View Slide

  24. https://www.flickr.com/photos/[email protected]/7020151809

    View Slide

  25. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_GvRx7XuFcI

    View Slide

  26. Title Text

    View Slide

  27. https://www.flickr.com/photos/[email protected]/29587943162

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  28. • Broadcom BCM2835 @ 1GHz ARM11 core
    • 512MB of LPDDR2 SDRAM
    • A micro-SD card slot
    • A mini-HDMI socket for 1080p60 video output
    • Micro-USB sockets for data and power
    • 40-pin GPIO header
    • 65mm x 30mm x 5mm

    View Slide

  29. • Broadcom BCM2835 @ 1GHz ARM11 core
    • 512MB of LPDDR2 SDRAM
    • A micro-SD card slot
    • A mini-HDMI socket for 1080p60 video output
    • Micro-USB sockets for data and power
    • 40-pin GPIO header
    • 65mm x 30mm x 5mm
    Apollo Guidance Computer (AGC)
    • 0.043MHz
    • 64Kbyte of memory
    • Assembler code converted manually from Luminary
    • Loaded using punch cards

    View Slide

  30. 3rd Golden Rush

    View Slide

  31. You should not 

    become a developer

    View Slide

  32. Obsolescence

    View Slide

  33. Depression

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  34. Loneliness

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  35. Self-doubt

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  36. Bad Health

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  37. https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2015/aug/21/gamergate-sexism-games-industry-women-trolls

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  38. (lack of) Passion

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  39. Thank you!
    Questions?
    Paul Ardeleanu
    @pardel

    View Slide

  40. I DO want to 

    become a developer

    View Slide

  41. http://stackoverflow.com/research/developer-survey-2016#technology-most-popular-technologies

    View Slide

  42. Learning

    View Slide

  43. What programming language
    should you learn first?

    View Slide

  44. View Slide

  45. View Slide

  46. http://stackoverflow.com/research/developer-survey-2016#technology-most-popular-technologies

    View Slide

  47. https://www.flickr.com/photos/nathansmith/4704268314

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  48. Follow your gut

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  49. First is always the hardest

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  50. re: Self-doubt

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  51. Swift

    View Slide

  52. LLVM

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  53. Know your tools

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  54. Testing

    View Slide

  55. View Slide

  56. TDD or BDD?

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  57. To Be Determined

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  58. Aim for the future

    View Slide

  59. Additional skills

    View Slide

  60. Sketching

    View Slide

  61. Lateral learning

    View Slide

  62. Invest in yourself

    View Slide

  63. Education system is in trouble

    View Slide

  64. Resources

    View Slide

  65. View Slide

  66. “Intelligence” as commodity

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  67. Pay your dues

    View Slide

  68. Mentors

    View Slide

  69. Ask for help & feedback

    View Slide

  70. Social

    View Slide

  71. Play nice with others

    View Slide

  72. Meeting people

    View Slide

  73. Conferences

    View Slide

  74. View Slide

  75. Coding Bootcamp

    View Slide

  76. Hackathons

    View Slide

  77. View Slide

  78. It’s your own business

    View Slide

  79. View Slide

  80. Sustainable business model

    View Slide

  81. 0%
    25%
    50%
    75%
    100%
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
    Customer lifetime value
    Period of usage

    View Slide

  82. 0%
    25%
    50%
    75%
    100%
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
    Customer lifetime value
    Period of usage

    View Slide

  83. Be a brand

    View Slide

  84. Become unique

    View Slide

  85. View Slide

  86. Morality

    View Slide

  87. View Slide

  88. https://www.flickr.com/photos/vaxzine/3463485198/

    View Slide

  89. View Slide

  90. http://www.pnas.org/content/111/24/8788.full

    View Slide

  91. https://www.flickr.com/photos/okokitsme/4337117973

    View Slide

  92. #practical

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  93. https://www.flickr.com/photos/varietystl/15372215258

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  94. http://www.theverge.com/2012/2/7/2782947/path-ios-app-user-information-collected-privacy

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  95. https://www.flickr.com/photos/6pocketpixie2/5946809819

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  96. https://www.flickr.com/photos/fumigraphik/14365706874

    View Slide

  97. View Slide

  98. Title Text

    View Slide

  99. View Slide

  100. https://www.google.com/policies/privacy/archive/20160325-20160628/

    View Slide

  101. http://darkpatterns.org/privacy-zuckering/

    View Slide

  102. View Slide

  103. https://www.computer.org/web/education/code-of-ethics

    View Slide

  104. https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2016/nov/10/facebook-fake-news-us-election-mark-zuckerberg-donald-trump

    View Slide

  105. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hippocratic_Oath
    "First do no harm"

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  106. Future

    View Slide

  107. https://www.flickr.com/photos/nicholasjon/4498088305

    View Slide

  108. Positive impact

    View Slide

  109. https://www.flickr.com/photos/emandernie/6354072295

    View Slide

  110. View Slide

  111. The journey

    View Slide

  112. Dream

    View Slide

  113. Money

    View Slide

  114. A software developer is going to the store and her partner tells her: 

    ”Buy a gallon of milk, and if there are eggs, buy a dozen."
    So she goes, buys everything, and drives back to the house.
    Upon arrival, her partner angrily asks her:
    ”Why did you get 13 gallons of milk?" 

    The programmer says, "There were eggs!"

    View Slide

  115. View Slide

  116. https://twitter.com/SciencePorn/status/578075637274955776/

    View Slide

  117. Be a human first and a
    software engineer second

    View Slide

  118. Thank you!
    Paul Ardeleanu
    @pardel

    View Slide