You should not become a developer

You should not become a developer

In this talk Paul will have a go at explaining the following anecdote:

A software developer is going to the store and her partner tells her, "Buy a bottle of milk, and if there are eggs, buy a dozen." So she goes, buys everything, and drives back to the house. Upon arrival, her partner angrily asks her, "Why did you get 13 bottle of milk?" The programmer says, "There were eggs!"

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Paul Ardeleanu

November 12, 2016
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Transcript

  1. “But I don’t want to go among mad people," Alice

    remarked. "Oh, you can’t help that," said the Cat: "we’re all mad here. 
 I’m mad. You’re mad." "How do you know I’m mad?" said Alice. "You must be," said the Cat, or you wouldn’t have come here.” 
 Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland
  2. You should not become a developer Paul Ardeleanu @pardel

  3. You should NOT become a developer Paul Ardeleanu @pardel

  4. A software developer is going to the store and her

    partner tells her: 
 ”Buy a bottle of milk, and if there are eggs, buy a dozen." So she goes, buys everything, and drives back to the house. Upon arrival, her partner angrily asks her: ”Why did you get 13 bottles of milk?" 
 The programmer says, "There were eggs!"
  5. None
  6. Don’t try this at home

  7. https://www.flickr.com/photos/nicholasjon/4498088305

  8. None
  9. None
  10. Context

  11. Who are you?

  12. Why are you here today?

  13. Who am I?

  14. https://www.flickr.com/photos/cod_gabriel/2149613466

  15. Unknown author but… Thank you!

  16. Title Text

  17. https://www.flickr.com/photos/simici/2188919061

  18. None
  19. https://www.flickr.com/photos/telwink/3797070188

  20. https://www.flickr.com/photos/10657705@N00/9197011039

  21. None
  22. https://www.flickr.com/photos/snebtorlife/5165020361

  23. https://www.flickr.com/photos/bensutherland/3302494365/

  24. https://www.flickr.com/photos/97591625@N00/7020151809

  25. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_GvRx7XuFcI

  26. Title Text

  27. https://www.flickr.com/photos/120586634@N05/29587943162

  28. • Broadcom BCM2835 @ 1GHz ARM11 core • 512MB of

    LPDDR2 SDRAM • A micro-SD card slot • A mini-HDMI socket for 1080p60 video output • Micro-USB sockets for data and power • 40-pin GPIO header • 65mm x 30mm x 5mm
  29. • Broadcom BCM2835 @ 1GHz ARM11 core • 512MB of

    LPDDR2 SDRAM • A micro-SD card slot • A mini-HDMI socket for 1080p60 video output • Micro-USB sockets for data and power • 40-pin GPIO header • 65mm x 30mm x 5mm Apollo Guidance Computer (AGC) • 0.043MHz • 64Kbyte of memory • Assembler code converted manually from Luminary • Loaded using punch cards
  30. 3rd Golden Rush

  31. You should not 
 become a developer

  32. Obsolescence

  33. Depression

  34. Loneliness

  35. Self-doubt

  36. Bad Health

  37. https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2015/aug/21/gamergate-sexism-games-industry-women-trolls

  38. (lack of) Passion

  39. Thank you! Questions? Paul Ardeleanu @pardel

  40. I DO want to 
 become a developer

  41. http://stackoverflow.com/research/developer-survey-2016#technology-most-popular-technologies

  42. Learning

  43. What programming language should you learn first?

  44. None
  45. None
  46. http://stackoverflow.com/research/developer-survey-2016#technology-most-popular-technologies

  47. https://www.flickr.com/photos/nathansmith/4704268314

  48. Follow your gut

  49. First is always the hardest

  50. re: Self-doubt

  51. Swift

  52. LLVM

  53. Know your tools

  54. Testing

  55. None
  56. TDD or BDD?

  57. To Be Determined

  58. Aim for the future

  59. Additional skills

  60. Sketching

  61. Lateral learning

  62. Invest in yourself

  63. Education system is in trouble

  64. Resources

  65. None
  66. “Intelligence” as commodity

  67. Pay your dues

  68. Mentors

  69. Ask for help & feedback

  70. Social

  71. Play nice with others

  72. Meeting people

  73. Conferences

  74. None
  75. Coding Bootcamp

  76. Hackathons

  77. None
  78. It’s your own business

  79. None
  80. Sustainable business model

  81. 0% 25% 50% 75% 100% 1 2 3 4 5

    6 7 8 9 10 Customer lifetime value Period of usage
  82. 0% 25% 50% 75% 100% 1 2 3 4 5

    6 7 8 9 10 Customer lifetime value Period of usage
  83. Be a brand

  84. Become unique

  85. None
  86. Morality

  87. None
  88. https://www.flickr.com/photos/vaxzine/3463485198/

  89. None
  90. http://www.pnas.org/content/111/24/8788.full

  91. https://www.flickr.com/photos/okokitsme/4337117973

  92. #practical

  93. https://www.flickr.com/photos/varietystl/15372215258

  94. http://www.theverge.com/2012/2/7/2782947/path-ios-app-user-information-collected-privacy

  95. https://www.flickr.com/photos/6pocketpixie2/5946809819

  96. https://www.flickr.com/photos/fumigraphik/14365706874

  97. None
  98. Title Text

  99. None
  100. https://www.google.com/policies/privacy/archive/20160325-20160628/

  101. http://darkpatterns.org/privacy-zuckering/

  102. None
  103. https://www.computer.org/web/education/code-of-ethics

  104. https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2016/nov/10/facebook-fake-news-us-election-mark-zuckerberg-donald-trump

  105. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hippocratic_Oath "First do no harm"

  106. Future

  107. https://www.flickr.com/photos/nicholasjon/4498088305

  108. Positive impact

  109. https://www.flickr.com/photos/emandernie/6354072295

  110. None
  111. The journey

  112. Dream

  113. Money

  114. A software developer is going to the store and her

    partner tells her: 
 ”Buy a gallon of milk, and if there are eggs, buy a dozen." So she goes, buys everything, and drives back to the house. Upon arrival, her partner angrily asks her: ”Why did you get 13 gallons of milk?" 
 The programmer says, "There were eggs!"
  115. None
  116. https://twitter.com/SciencePorn/status/578075637274955776/

  117. Be a human first and a software engineer second

  118. Thank you! Paul Ardeleanu @pardel