Chapter 21-22-23 Nihit's Vacation, Being Skittish and Stuck, and then Plain Unclear

#2022-11-15 ## 2022-11-15 – Evidence 21A – Updates To Nihit’s
Vacation ### Dr. Marvin’s Notes Pt arrived on time. Initially reviewed updates to N's vacation. Feels that they are keeping up with tasks despite changes to the schedule. Content platform leader reached out. Pt. was able to respond with a brief message that she was taking a break from the platform. Reviewed "sessions" from the last several days. Most of today's session spent reviewing current writing project, "Case File." This is the evolution of the project that matches writer's note with personal details. She has moved to a word document with additional formatting and organization decisions made. Reviewed content from several sections (introductions, reflections). Feeling good about the process - able to identify patterns of affect and reactions/behaviors. This led to uncovering barrier to writing process - fear of strong affect/being out of control, based on past experiences, exposed through the writing. Explored process, identified automatic thoughts, practiced challenges, reviewed goals for next steps. Able to log into writing platform and look at current exercise. Reflected on affect generated in session - validated and briefly discussed options for working on the writing exercise with more neutral content, checking in with more parts on process, monitoring affect during process. Global Improvement (CGI-C): No change Assessment (Depression): - Moods mostly stable. - Current project to process writer's notes in collaboration with personal insights - making meaning of work/life. Project uncovered pattern of worry/fear which has been barrier to progress. - Several ongoing medical follow-ups remain in process. Back pain is an ongoing issue. Actively following up with appts. Upcoming steroid injection for back pain. - Working to maintain progress with writing projects and balance with other activities.

- Able to contract for safety. Assessment (DID): - Current
writing project aiding bringing additional understanding and meaning to work. Reflection on project able to identify pattern of anxiety connecting writing to past experiences and make plan for assessing/managing. - Continues to work to balance time online with writing/reading/household tasks. - Review of home videos in background. Goal remains to process smaller pieces of the video as time allows. - Working on larger writing project (trauma narrative) - goals/product/audience. #2022-11-16

## 2022-11-16 – Evidence 21B – Today Was Not Stellar
- A Very Good Morning - How was sleep last night? - Good morning. We are working at getting here earlier, but today was not stellar. To be fair when we signed on, Nihit signed on soon after. He was at his Mom's place still and will be for another couple of days. It is Wednesday night there, and he will be leaving in the afternoon on Friday. YAY!! As to our sleep, we needed a couple of nudges to get up. Rich was already making breakfast in the kitchen. I think we had woken up with him about 5:15AM, and we picked up our iPad and read a little more on Donald Trump's announcement to be running for the President again. But after a LONG story, we fell asleep again. I do not recall dreams or nightmares. - How have we been (the previous day)? - Yesterday, we did good as to getting some stuff done earlier, but after Dr. Marvin's it was another hour to clearing our screen. We were listening to comedians when Rich got home. We had not done the dishes and did not feel we were up to much. We did eventually get up to feed the dog, but we still were not able to do dishes. Rich was all over the kitchen making a new "pizza" dish. It was Good in an uncomplicated way in that the meat was hamburger. There was cheese and potatoes - shredded ... forgot the name. Breakfast stuff. Hashbrowns! That is, it! We did add salsa because that is the way we eat our pizza, but it was warm and gooey, and hit the spot, plus served with corn chips. Yes! - We watched Michelle Obama on Steven Colbert during dinner, and then we saw Bob and Abishola, and then we saw NCIS - before tying it up with a couple of 15's. We caught the Presidential "speech," though I would only loosely call it that. It was more like a long-drawn out whine. To which, he said, "oh yeah, I'm running for President." He did a lot of media hype and I felt like he had ransomed the US to be watching some slobbers' fest. Plus, we were reading most of it from the prompter which he is not known for being good. I fell asleep, and then woke up right after he announced. Rich was mad because we made him watch it, but then WE fell asleep. Then we wanted to hear it so after he turned on the thunderstorms, we picked the iPad, and at an incredibly low level, we listened to it, but fell asleep again. SO, then ONE more

time and we heard it and then thought. Rich was
right, it was nothing. I think at the end, Rich got up and went to bed-bed. - One thing today about which we can get excited. - That we do not need to listen to all that is going to be on the air about Trump today. We had done well with not listening to all the videos, but now there will be a play between his election junk and his legal woes. It is SOOO obvious that one is to cover the other, that we feel disgusted in this way to be an American. We feel better in that just getting through the mid-terms, we, and everyone else knows his candidates did terrible. It was all about him, and there can be nothing done except to give him credit for losing the "Red Wave." I heard it was more a Blue splash. - I will be working on writing and editing today, so we feel good about that. We left the sewing machine - quilting on our 3:00PM schedule, but I am not counting on that. Rich is going to be home today, so we might have to pay attention to that, but I am not jumping on that bandwagon either. - How would we deal with a stressful situation that could trip us up today? - We can be sure to → - There just took a few moments break and then started the Pomodoro again. We are on the third one. We feel a little bit of a curmudgeon (Bad-tempered person, especially an old one). Not feeling strong about anything. Yesterday's session with Dr. Marvin is still burning on our nerves. I do not want to get stuck here with no means of going forward. I do not think we will be seeing Nihit the rest of the day. It is only 9:30PM there, but his father had asked to talk with him, Nihit was already tired, and he had taken his bedtime medicine. He acknowledged; he had not taken any of it the last few days while at his moms - stop to open mail for Rich. - I do not think (with all the interruptions), we have gotten too far on Nihit, let me review ... On our side, we caught him up to Dr. Marvin, and we looked at those difficult spots - on pages (old) seventy-six & eighty-one. These were the troublesome parts of Dr. Marvin's meeting, and Nihit had read Dr. Marvin's notes carefully, enough to ask, "Hey, What's going on here." Maybe not exactly, but something like that. At first, he was laughing, and we did not want to go into it with him at that space. He pointed out that we said something was private, and then the next sentence we were talking about our sexuality. That was very unnerving. Hey, you ... this is not the funny stuff. Nihit got that it was not funny, but neither of us were able to read very deeply into it now. It was enough for him to know that somehow sexual/writing course had become overwhelming, and he knew that was a problem, we would both been trying to solve. For me, but for him too - not to say sexually, but for some reason including time, he had not been able to get back into the Nick Milo he ALSO held in high regard. So, I know this is something we are coming back to, but I had not heard what was going on for him, he was away from home, and he looked like a wet sewer rat! Hehe ... this is just to see if we have caught his attention. He just looked tired. - Nihit has been doing more time with family (all around), and more eating. He said one of the conversations was more difficult, and we could see it riding on his mind, but there really was not time to talk about it proper, especially with how tired he was. Oh, and his family is home from the US. I think the kids, especially Aanya was grouchy that Nihit was not there, but school got most the angry brunt when after they had gotten home during the wee hours, Mom did not wake the kids to go to school as they requested. Jet lag ... they gotta know about jet lag! Other news ... Nihit is behind in his own coursework,

but that was without saying. Of course, the family would
take over the time necessary for homework. He will just have to go and work it out with a double load next week. When he gets home on Friday, it will be late, and he will be catching up with family at his aunts. This is the problem when one is so popular! - If we were someone looking at our life from an elevated level, what would we tell ourselves? - An Eagle's eye view → - Plan out your day, and sort of glide into it. - What else are we thinking of? (Morning Pages) - I am thinking as to scheduling, we must break things down between - Quilting - Writing 10:30 - 11:30AM (lunch 1 hour) back up at 12:30-1:30PM - Course 1:30-2:30PM - Editing 3 - 5PM - No order, but in reverse. How are we going to get to all of that? It is now about 10:30AM. We will have to try and hit some marks. There cut out quilting ... cannot go forward on that until we get to some of that course work. It will be affecting me/us more directly. We could go about 2 hours of each. Hmm, maybe - there we pressed out a schedule. Better add this to the Sessions page. - Ok, if we do not overthink it ... this will be a good schedule. And, if we do not use up an hour with the course, then that time built into the editing. - One word/phrase that could describe the kind of person we want to be today? - One phrase to rule them all → - You are a writer(s) - take charge! ### Day-to-Day Goals - Do we have any riveting goals today? Should we have? - Our goals will be to follow the above schedule - and keeping low-key enough so that we do not get overly tired before the project is complete. AND it should include cleaning the kitchen at that lunch hour. Cannot skate past TWO days in a row, especially with Rich hanging around. We did the dishes, and he placed yesterday's dishes in the dishwasher, and we did last night's and started it, so today, we should empty the dishwasher and have it ready for dinner dishes. YAY. That would be a cool thing :) - Rich said yesterday that our minimal work in the house should be one thing - and that one thing should always include the dishwasher. We did do mail today; a riveting goal would be to clean up that bench in our bedroom? It would make it more inviting to hop in the shower and dressed. It means clearing up wedding clothes that should go to the cleaners. We can do it, just been avoidant. Yes, we will make that our one task extra :)

- Are all today's food choices in My Fitness Pal
(MFP)? How can we get through any slumps? - We are through the morning on time. Just eggs and toast, PLUS, we finished the last five carrots. We will try to do the red grapes and pistachios for lunch, and popcorn for snack. Not sure what dinner is but saw some pork meat defrosting on the counter yesterday. We will see. - What exercising could I commit to today? How much? - We should be pulling the pedals toward our couch and assure that we have at least 15-20 minutes done during lunch. Since Rich is around, we might be watching regular news, so it is good timing. - What can you tell us about the showering experience today? - We would need to shave an extra 30 minutes off something to get in the shower today. Optimally, it would be before lunch, but better to take the break after. 1:15PM to 1:45PM. That way, we will take off evenly 15 minutes from writing and fifteen from course. I really WANT to be getting to the editing, especially before we are too tired. - What could we do today, so that someone else can say, "Boldly Go! Howard Wolowitz" - Be a writer, Ann, be a writer ALL DAY! - ### Balance - How is our perspective of time going? Are we still on track? - We are still on track and flourishing! I do not know what my/our end goals are in writing. We are trying to see how far we will go. - What has been going well? - Making choices about our day with the goal of getting things done. AND tomorrow is already a Dr. Marvin day. There might be some progress, at least if we use the 45-minute course time to be reading/listening to Sana's presentation. Maybe make a clearer list of the things that we must do - alongside the parts feedback as to the things that are going wrong for them. Do not overwhelm ourselves, just stay in balance. - Today, we have added balance by ... - Writing out a late morning/afternoon schedule ALONG with following sessions during the morning - What could have been better? - We could be putting more faith into Amazing Marvin. Right now, it is standing primarily for work thrown into Makework.fun app. I am not sure why. We told Conrad we are hanging back, but right now, we are still at the app, AND we are about the only people there. The season appears to have started. We are on a low 1165 pts, there is another person at 350, and the third at 175. EVERYONE else is on zero! I do not want to give up on it. It is the little we can do for Conrad. BUT that is it! Dr. Marvin - helped us write him off too in his notes. Just gotta let things go, so that they can take their course. ### Seriously, as a writer...

- What kinds of ideas have come to mind today?
Relevancy to a better life? - We have about 7 minutes per each of these next three questions. Paying attention to time is one of the ideas that are coming to mind. We feel the need to pace ourselves, so we can be happy with our progress at the end of the day. - Yesterday, we got the new TUL binder with the 2" disks. They look HUGE and very scary in thinking about what it is going to take to fill them all up. We thought we had an innovative idea how to transfer power. We thought we could start at the beginning (we have), and edit, but then as we are then ready to print-out - final copy, unless Nihit gets serious about adding his own comments. If he does - Woo-hoo! He will add to the author names on the front of the book. IF he wants it. If he cannot honestly shake out some time, then we are going to let it go for the time being, as in getting his notes would be terrific, but I cannot depend on it for the amount we want to do in a fair amount of time, so we can start our next book. Either he or Dr. Marvin asked yesterday, and we responded that our goal is five hundred pages. We are now at ... about 225 pages. We will get there. Furthermore, we started when Nihit gave us the journal idea ... August 26th. So that has been about ...well, just shy of three months. SOOO, what we could be saying is that this is going to be going faster than anything, if we keep up with our writing thoughts. Be cool to turn out a book every six months, hmm? - What are writing cues which include writing/reading about Multiplicity, trauma, and being a better human being? - As to how writing more consistently in a formal process, is going to help Multiplicity, I am not sure. The first thought though is that making accomplishments are hard for most people, more difficult for Multiples, in that we all must come to working agreement about what things are going to happen in our path. Therefore, writing is so important, is that it catches all our ideas. - Nihit and most likely Dr. Marvin, are wondering how this becomes a book that is more than about us. Hell, we are wondering too. Nihit yesterday asked about making chapters, and such. We have been thinking about it more directly since, thought of course, the subject has come to mind previously. I think that as we are reading it, we should be looking for the points that really turn interest, especially if we can tie it into things we have learned, that are worthwhile about Multiplicity. It has been quite some time since checking in with other Multiples, like the ones on Facebook. I am not sure what it is that they are having problems learning. Originally, we wanted some of our book to incorporate general thoughts, and we wanted some of it to incorporate sections of the book better aimed at directives won or loss - by section/session/chapter. - We are affecting Multiplicity by ... - Trying to be a solid thinker, and able to complete with what is in front of them - I also think it would be advantageous to look back into the roles of not only Facebook, but as well the Multiple or trauma reading, we had done before. So, between that and coursework, what comes first? ### Note Making - Ideas Log - Are there any burning ideas to scramble down quickly?

- We are back from an unsuccessful trip out with
Ginney. She saw someone walking down the road with a large parka. She did not tolerate that at all, so we had to come inside. Not only that, but she of course jumped up on the couch and continued the loud barking, and then with some prodding came in and somehow lost the guy. He was going to our neighbors across the street, because he did not come around the front way - doing the bigger circle. Now she must wait an hour, because that will cover the time it takes for the second bus of kids coming home. She could have sprinkled! - As to other ideas ... we decided to go over to the writing desk and skim through our books to see if anything was interesting and fitted where we are in life today. AND we produced two books. The latter one, we started to read with delight! "Overcoming the Odds: High risk children from birth to adulthood," (Werner and Smith, 1995), and "Resilience and Vulnerability: Adaptation in the context of childhood adversities," (Ed. Luthar, 2003). - It seemed like both must have picked up about the same time, in that they both discuss Resiliency and positive adaptation. We did not get too far, before Thom called, and then Ginney needed out and now here we are. What I liked about the book by Luthar is that they edited a HUGE book. It is 574 pages, written by twenty-one groups of writers, all experts in the field. They are drawing on a vast number of studies that have taken on all kinds of life disruptions. AND the first thing they were saying in the intro was how the brain affected by trauma. You KNOW that is going to interest me down the line. The authors are asking, in general, "What makes a difference." How do you go through adversity at a noticeably early age, and then what factors engage in that you come out successful anyway. This is how I feel when we write. I feel successful. Somehow between these last 23 years and whatever it was that got me to the point of meeting Dr. Marvin and beyond ... There was driving us to go forward. I think that we have had a tremendous amount of adversity. So, which parts can we write about that are effective. And can we weave that into our writing. It is in the spirit of "If I can do it, you can too." Or moreover, can I at least help if you are trying to succeed too. Two and a half years studying productivity has gotten us to place where we are going to follow our goals and then set something down in stone. Right? - Are there unanswered questions from the day? - Oh - do not forget about this idea ... but we were wondering if we could not add subtitles above or next to the evidence page. That might be the next step in getting us to gather chapters, or subchapters. People need to feel a gist of what they are getting themselves into. It was important with both books we picked up to scan the Table of Contents. We needed it to frame our minds and assist us in figuring out if this book(s) was going to be helpful for all the time and patience invested in reading. And, shoot, we aren't a pro - it can be a little bit fun too, right? - Idea Expansion (Nick Milo) - How is this new idea (note) relevant to the question(s) I am considering? - Basically, now in short form, because we really blew our timing, but how do we incorporate our natural inclination to write out as we are here, to be turning out a book, which is in formats understood. - Secondly, what would it take to put context around what we are doing so that it helps others. What is it about our thinking and putting things together, that would be helpful to ourselves or others? - Is this idea (note) like or different from the others to which I am comparing it to?

- This is more a note different from others in
that it is not from our past ... we might get there in a second, but it is considering Multiples. I think in general; the same part is that Multiples all go through trauma when they are exceedingly small. BUT it does not mean they cannot be successful. I thought for a moment ... can I be successful never finishing my masters, or in being on disability. I believe I am. I feel like I am living the life that I was always meant to live. I have a nice warm place, someone to snuggle with, interesting people in our horizon, and here we are talking to you - THROUGH writing!!! - Do my present thoughts (notes) agree or disagree with one another? - I think our present thoughts agree with one another. I am going with the idea that we may have something within us, or have had learned, that make it possible for us to feel successful in the life we are leading. I cannot tell you how happy, we are with family, or friends like Rich and Nihit, and for SURE Dr. Marvin. It is like all these people are in our life, and it feels like a life of purpose. I know we started with the first sheets telling you all our problems, but until I cannot write anymore, we have a lot of opportunity. After that? Sure, we are going to park in front of a nice window with snow coming down. We will have one of those typewriters that work through the human gazing from one letter to the next. I will always be having something to say. I feel that others would benefit from telling their stories and adventures too. You want to come along, right? - Are there other connections that I may like to make between my ideas (notes)? - Multiples happen to be in the group that grew up with a lot of adversity. How do you become, or are you already making the best use of your life? Take a happiness test. Do you smile, and feel friendly to yourself or others? Jump on board! What is it that makes all this possible. Some people do not make it, and they go down wrong paths, wrong choices, but we figure ... You can change that at any time. Those things could become part of the adversity you grew up with, and you just need the opportunity to put those characteristics out that make you resilient to all upon you. This is worth the try, right? Hmm, I seem to be the one that ends her sentences in, "Right?" We are looking for a confirmation. Are you going forward with just the reading we are putting down now? Interested in how another three months ends up? Sure ... why not! - The 7Cs of Note Making (Nick Milo) - "Dr. Marvin - look, we're doing it! We ARE Confident~!!" - I think what this is, is a breath of confidence. I have been seeing that word in Dr. Marvin's notes. Forgot the word that went with it ... Hold on. I should look. It surrounds the idea of making meaning out of your life. I do feel at this moment my life has meaning. - "Continued discussion on how these are connected to past discussion on dependence/independence, abandonment/empowerment/confidence. Able to pull from writing that spoke to these themes. Explored options for predicting (planning ahead) and managing (supportive self) for these thoughts/moods. Reviewed goals for the afternoon and next several days." (Dr. Marvin, 11-3-22). - I think in some way this is a part of one part inching forward and growing a little bit. I do not always, but we feel strong right now. Not only that, but I like the feeling. Likewise, I would like to shout it from the rooftop! But it is snowing out there and slippery. Hehe ... did not stop me from yelling just a second ago, "I FEEL GOOD!!" Just Ginney our puppy and us right now in the house. Our yelling still feels loud. It

is echoing in our ears. Reminds me about getting to
the top of a cross-country ski trail, taking it all in with a breath, planting the ski poles in the ground, and pushing with glee as we cruise down the hill. Life cannot really be much more perfect! - Every life has value to it - Sometimes it is difficult to find the path where everything seems orderly and put in place - You do not feel important to yourself or others, but then something comes by and gives you a little friendly nudge. - You are ok! You are going to be ok. Just one foot forward. Find yourself wherever you are. Feel your stance, whether sitting or standing. Feel the pressure coming up from the ground/chair. Sit up straight. Take a couple deep breaths. What is in front of your sight, whether your eyes work or not. What is it that you want to do. Who do you want to be? What would it take to be on that path. Is there anything stopping you now. Can you whisper ... I am going to do something that helps me get to where I want to go, and we are going to do it now ... Ok, 5, 4, 3, 2, & 1 Jump forward now! You can do it; I believe in YOU! - This is a good thing, though, we do not want to step down from the high. Naturally, there will have to be a change from where our little hands are typing away, to being elsewhere in our world. It is going to be a good thing too because it is all right to move now. Just look around, what do we see? Too much a look. I can smell tonight's dinner, and I know we need to add the vegetables in 17 minutes. We can do it. The rest of the space seems foreign. I have seen these walls and pieces of furniture before, but they all seem misplaced. Like strewn about, not knowing where things came from. All those things touch our life somehow, but for now, for me, they seem scary. I know though that others are getting tired of my typing. Ok, shh. Just a few moments longer. - Being scared is different from being confident. I do not know where that just went. Let us just move on, ok? - Cite - These thoughts are from us ... obviously more than one. - Solution Prompt - What is the problem → - We were having a high time, and then there was a switch, and Annemarie was out and confused by us asking her to turn around. We wanted her to feel with her confidence, she could impose it on other parts of our home - not with getting out of her chair or anything, but at least to accept from her perch of confidence, that things here in our world were ok. But she could not do the translation. Instead of confidence, we were all feeling her fear. Nobody likes that or wants her to go through it. At some point, the highs will last longer than the lows. - What is the solution → - We need to keep trying. Like a baby bird pushed out of the nest. "Dear I wouldn't do this to you, if I wasn't 100% confident you could fly." - What is the benefit →

- We were able to stay with the distinct parts
... being high and being low. And, it was ok, because in a few moments, I would jump down to the next line and continue to type. It is going to be ok. I know. - So, What Next (Next Action Step?) - Glance at the time ... we only have one more minute. Might as well go add the vegetables now. It IS our house (and Rich's). We can help take responsibility. YAY! And Dishes too! ### Anne & Nihit - Both selves - Perspective - Are we helping ourselves before helping others? How? Let us make this a respectable job! Do not distract! - We are helping ourselves in writing like we did today. We did not get to everything, but we were finally successful at Sessions AND getting the 7Cs done. Secondarily, it would be nice to help someone else, but primarily it helped us. We felt good to be feeling BOTH the feelings. Confidence came and went but came back again. We did not melt with Annemarie's fears. AND, we might have helped her. She was able to do the kitchen this time. We are enormously proud of her! - What difficulties are we having focused on the day outlined? Get your head back in the game! - I feel bad about our nice schedule we made from 10:30AM to 5:00PM. Only the writing happened, but we were surprised with getting some reading time too, AND we got to talk to Thom. He was cool today. He asked about us. I feel crazy talking to him, but he seems to know in general what we are doing, and he is still ok with us, and said he loves us. This is the stuff of perfect days. - Between us - Nihit and Anne - How was today a gift through Nihit/Ann conversation? - We did not get to talk to Nihit for long, but it was an important anchor in his day. I felt most proud with remembering and reminding him he had to take his medicine. He was a little low with his father's conversation, and he left us to have another conversation with his dad. We were good, and I could feel him steel himself up. But we are going to need remembering that any conversation where he is either up or down is ok. He must fix himself, but just keep loving him anyway. We want him to be smiling and laughing, AND not so tired! - In what way are Nihit and us helping each other today - have we rallied!?? - I would say we rallied. He like Thom made a point to ask us on what we were working. What was it that interested us. This is a rally like nothing else. WOW! Someone is interested! Feels like a million dollars! - What could Nihit and us accomplish by talking together with Dr. Marvin? - I would like to have a three-way conversation and ask the question, how can we help each other the most - psychologically. We have been working on goals through the Sessions. And we feel good about that, but to make a more perfect relationship, what kinds of things could we do. That is a good talk!

#2022-11-17 ## 2022-11-17 – Evidence 21C – We Were Nightmarish
A Very Good Morning - How was sleep last night? - I think we only got up once during the morning. I know we were nightmarish, but do not remember what that was all about. We got up at 5:15AM with Rich, but then we did not want to disturb Rich with lights, so went to the computer. It was too hard though to sit upright. Rich recommended we come back and use the iPad, which we did, but then had a terrible time letting it go. When we paused to think about writing, all we wanted to do was goof-around and watch Facebook videos. There was nothing on, but it was a distraction. Anything from Bond Bailsmen to making Asian breakfast creations. Finally, we got a call from Nihit. He said he had been on for three hours, but he was getting work done. We talked for about a half hour before his mom called him for dinner. We felt a little more motivated in that we were here, and it was good to talk to him. Not full of a LOT of energy, but hopefully, we can creep along. I think he will be off for the rest of his night. It feels a bit depressing. BUT HEY! Two good days of writing, right? AND, we have Dr. Marvin in about 1 1/2-hours. - How have we been (the previous day)? - Yesterday, was a stellar day in that, we wrote most of the day. I was proud of that, and we kept going, hoping that we could get to the 7Cs, which we did. We are going to check that out now, but it was ok. They are short, but genuinely nice in a meaningful way. And, this time, we did not go into the past, meaning our childhood. Decent job! - One thing today about which we can get excited. - One thing we can be excited about is Rich coming home. Shoot forgot to find out if he is going to the fishy meeting tonight. That would turn around my day. We started out at 9:30AM and it is about 3:00PM now. We just plugged in the phone because it was on about 4%. We can sneak a call in. Hold on ... oh. Yes, you have been on hold all day. Yeeks. Sorry about this.

- How would we deal with a stressful situation that
could trip us up today? - We can be sure to → - Ahh, this might be a trip up. I wished for Rich to come home, so we call, and he is less than 10-minutes away. WOW! This SHOULD be good, but then he might say something about needing to take a shower. I know it came up right away with Dr. Marvin. I had apologized for not taking one, and then he said, well we have not talked about that for a long while, shall we do it now. Heart racing. No! We told him we had an 8:00AM appointment with Dr. Austin, and that we would check in on it then. - If we were someone looking at our life from a prominent level, what would we tell ourselves? - An Eagle's eye view → - Slow down Betsy ... Let us get this straight! - What else are we thinking of? (Morning Pages) - This is going to be an awkward conversation. Rich just got home, and it was all medical. He is having surgery, but it might be a month and a half away. We will talk later ... he wants to talk tonight. bye. #2022-11-17 ## 2022-11-17 – Evidence 22A – Feeling “Skittish” and “Stuck” Dr. Marvin’s Notes

Pt arrived on time. Initially reported feeling "skittish" and "stuck."
Uncertain about why - has been working to stay busy while friend N is on his trip and not let schedule change/less conversation keep her from getting things done. Based on "sessions" (blocks for doing tasks), has been keeping up, spending most of them on writing. Moved on to review of recent writing. Had a good day yesterday, felt productive. Today woke up and was not feeling well so spent time on FB. Reviewed pattern, next steps, and method for prioritizing activities. Able to plan out this afternoon's schedule. Reviewed goals with returning to writing course. Reviewed potential for triggers identified last session and how to manage them. Would also like to return to quilting. She has worked out the information she needs to move the project forward and is feeling more confident about acting. Reviewed updates to medical appts - planning for visits. Reviewed/updated problem list. Reflected on how staying up to date with medical helps with writing - knows that it has taken care of and does not need to be worried about. Returned to writing and explored concept of resiliency - what defines this, how she manifests it. Reviewed plans to organize notes/writing into chapter and books based on current project. Validated process. Global Improvement (CGI-C): Minimally worse Assessment (Depression): - Moods lower today - several potential causes - distribution in relationship with friend on vacation, triggers with writing. - Current project to process writer's notes in collaboration with personal insights - making meaning of work/life. - Several ongoing medical follow-ups remain in process. Actively following up with appts. Upcoming appts for podiatry, neurosurgery consultation, pulmonary. - Working to maintain progress with writing projects and balance with other activities. - Able to contract for safety. Assessment (DID): - Current writing project aiding bringing additional understanding and meaning to work but also is a source of triggered thoughts/affect. Able to process in session and develop plan of action for this afternoon. - Continues to work to balance time online with writing/reading/household tasks. - Review of home videos in background. Goal remains to process smaller pieces of the video as time allows. - Working on larger writing project (trauma narrative) - goals/product/audience. Moving forward on "case file" project.

#2022-11-19 ## 2022-11-19 – Evidence 22B – Lost the Morning
Thoughts - A Very Good Morning - How was sleep last night? - It is already 10:00AM and we have lost the morning thoughts. We do have a marker that there was dreaming/nightmarish. Not sure which. We had a bad night with Rich ... he got home late; we ate hamburgers and fries from Johnny-K's. I had taken out my wallet to utilize my insurance cards. After seeing that on the counter when Rich got home, we told him, and then we told him we needed our insurance card because we were checking on a few things. I had called my insurance company and found I could get home health care and a durable piece of equipment - a hospital bed if we had back surgery. That was all the information I needed. I have an appointment with a back surgeon on Monday. - BUT Rich went into one of his outrages. At first, we tried to explain, but anything we said was putting gas on the flames. So, we stopped. We said we could not talk to him while he was just yelling. At first, we went back of the couches to the desk area, but he kept yelling, so we again said, we could not be present when he was yelling, so then we turned on the sewing room TV and sat in our sitting room recliner. We watched to the end of the Stephen Colbert show were watching. Rich did not continue. At the end of the show, we came in to check on him. He was ok, but Ginney was sitting on my couch seat, so we took the side one and slept there for the night. During the early morning when we got up for a second, and waking up about 6:45AM, Rich was still in bed. - Rich slept in about an hour and a half, and we did the coffee, Ginney outside, and Ginney's breakfast. Unfortunately, Ginney did not eat, and threw-up again, which woke up Rich. We rolled to the back of Rich's Couch seat, and then when he sat down, we asked him if he was in the mood for a massage and to talk about the depression/anger he was feeling from the night before. He talked a long time. Ninety- eight percent of the time we just listened as he went from one thing to another. Afterward, we both got cereal, ate separately. He went on to watch his Smerconish, and we went on to talk to Nihit, and then

Aanya came in. She did not want to talk to
us yet, but we backed-off so that Nihit could spend time with her. He just left to pick-up some groceries the store forgot to get him last night. - It had been a tough session. He thought we stormed off, where we thought it was slower and more timed as to leaving while he was yelling at me, but in his mind, it had not been the yelling, but me "storming off," that had caused the problem. He also felt we were trying to get the last word. For us, it is like trying to get any word, because Rich disqualifies so much of what we are saying and doing. He likes overseeing us. Like grabbing an eel though. Oh well, that is how it is going. In between things, he is as calm as anything. Just went back to planning two separate Thanksgivings. Thursday, Maury, and Erin are coming over, and Sunday, Jon, RJ, Chris, and Chrissy, plus the kids are coming over. We should contact Maury about Azure coming, she does not eat meats and might change some aspect of Rich's dinner. Ok, good, we left a note. - How have we been (the previous day)? - Before the blow-up with Rich, we were doing ok, except that Ginney ripped up my wallet. A good part of the cards as well. I thought I had had the cards where I wanted them. It is a good deal that my car registration held. She had them scattered to three separate rooms without us know them. Rich wanted to know if we put her in the kennel. We had not thought of it ... we thought we were the ones in trouble, because we left our wallet out next to us. She is just a little sneak. I knew better than that. You think you can control it, but she snuck it from the couch side council before we sat up. Sure, we had a blanket so it could have fallen out of sight. Good sneak. Well-deserved. I ordered a new wallet, but then Rich was complaining that he had paid a lot of money for the one he got. I asked how much, but that was a fool's errand. He was disappointed; I had gotten another before waiting for Christmas. It would have been a good gift, but we wanted to choose this time. AND NO, we did not purposely FEED the wallet to the dog. *Sigh* - The last thing about yesterday was that we went to the foot doctor's office, Dr. Austin. We have an ulcer (break in our skin) in our front left toe. It has been going on for a while, and still hurt, so we had to this is gross thing, but the dead skin preventing wound health. It needs cutting out. So, complete, but it was much worse than it started, so they gave us a boot and said to come back in 2 weeks, and then 2 weeks after that, plus I had to get an x-ray. I did not mean to cause that much trouble but done and over. - Shoot ... someone thought of doing dishes, and went to put dishes away, but in lifting the two bowls to put away we realized that we had to push some bowls back, but by then we had gotten too dizzy so sat down again. I do not know ... We will ask Rich to put the third batch of bowls toward the middle back and move the other two sets to the one and three position, but up front. Otherwise, I will get in trouble lifting that high and trying to negotiate our stance. I had just thought for a second, I wanted to get something done while he was out. I will sit for ten minutes, and then try some of the other dishes, or folding blankets or something like that. Maybe clean a desk or counter. It is all about an agreement to collaborate with him over the weekend since the holidays will be Thursday and Friday. - One thing today about which we can get excited. - We are doing our part. It is several hours since we started and now have the dishwasher started, the counter cleaned the dining table empty, plus the living room and sitting room, ready for vacuuming. Our sewing room is already ready. The big problem areas are dusting counter tops or washing bathroom

counters. PLUS, we still have my computer desk, and the
bench in our bedroom. Should do a load of clothes too. Rich put something in the wash - Ginney's bedding, I think. Forgot about that. The dusting/cleaning surface tops done tomorrow, but I would like to have the desk and bench cleaned yet today. That be good. Wow ... now the bench complete, and the desk picked up ... just needs to be surface cleaned. Oh, and we cleaned off the bathroom counter. - How would we deal with a stressful situation that could trip us up today? - We can be sure to → - Now it is many hours later. Lets ... cut-off here a go to the afternoon ... THAT might have tripped us up! - If we were someone looking at our life from an important level, what would we tell ourselves? - An Eagle's eye view → - She's not really being steady today, is she? Oh, but she did find her cane her father bought her as his last gift. Rich does not want us to use it, but we are looking toward steadying ourselves. We do carry a lot from one place to another. That would not help there. - What else are we thinking of? (Morning Pages) - I sure wish it did not smell like vinegar in here. Rich is cleaning out the coffee pot. ALL DAY! - One word/phrase that could describe the kind of person we want to be today? - One phrase to rule them all → - You can step ahead of yourself and be a much nicer woman! Someone is still stewing about Rich's sudden anger last night. - A Brilliant Afternoon - How is the day going? - I think insignificant things achieved. Rich was out shopping; WAY longer than he should have been. I know. Whatever he designs is good enough. But we have the feeling of doing work to please him, and we are mad at him. - How should we adjust course? - We should make it a point to do more than tolerate. He is just in his own world. We did not explain ... let me check. I do not think so ... massive thing ... small → is that Rich and us are both looking at surgeries. His will come first, and we will know on Monday if we will need one at all. I am like pretty matter of fact, but Rich is in emotional disaster mode. He is very depressed, and we were just trying to be calm. We LIVE in depression, time over time. I know he is scared. AND this morning we listened to all he had to say because that is important that we listen. We find a challenging time being anything but cranky inside though. - Most of it is him working over how he can slip out of his life for a bit. He came to a little more piece when he found his best fishy friend had had the same surgery and spent a couple of weeks in a recovery

center. He said this afternoon, which might take a little
pressure off all of us. I held my breath not knowing what to think. I had previously concluded that that would be a clever idea. I am thinking that might be the way to go. now too. - If we left Ginney at home Monday, and Rich took us in, which I am quite sure is the plan, then we could both talk to the doctor. The best hope is that we do not have to have surgery, but do not know how to manage all the back pain we are having. It is an extremely fast dizzy. - I think part of this is that Rich wants his situation to be so terrible that it is nothing like that for us, and we are just raining on his parade. The day before in our conversation - or the first day at least. We told him that he had to work out a way at not over-dominating us or screaming at us when he does not get his way. His recovery might be 6-weeks, and I am quite sure, I would leave him before that. AND we were upset that lately and certainly not at this time is he asking if we can help, and we are directly telling him he needs to sweeten the pot, but he is in his mind understands this to be me taking care of him, no matter what mood he might want to put out there. - AND, at least at first, you must check it out with your loved one - like would you and could you help even before anyone knows what kind of help asked. When the possibility of my surgery comes up, he says that if he had to take that kind of time off to care for me, might as well pull the business from him. But I believe most of my support could come from home healthcare so he would not have to worry. Some services might even help with housework, and some with cooking. Certainly, for dressing wounds, and helping with PT. And, for that matter if I really HAD to have surgery, we could spend a couple of weeks at rehab place too. - By checking it out before Monday, I already know I would not be a drain. Hardest part is getting Ginney in and out and those four stairs to get down to her area. Especially, with winter/snow weather. If worse comes to that ... we would find Ginney a place to stay for whatever bulk of time. It would kill me though ... so we are hoping she is all good. But the thing is you plan for whatever is coming up and that does not take anger? Does it? Why should it. Just must know your options. We asked him before we made our own calls if he had checked on his insurance for what they offered. He said it was not time. But Dr. Wemhoff, said to him, that he could lose his leg's ability to move within, even a couple of weeks. Rich is like nobody is going to ruin his Christmas - he thinks he does not have to ask his body, where it is. THIS is the kind of thing that makes me mad. BUT again. Just means I must do some planning. - I did hear he took a step in that ... for one, he is giving his employees the paid day off day after Thanksgiving, WOW! Making progress. The next thing was that he talked to his floor manager, and he told her she would get a raise starting the day she would need to cover for him. AND he is training in Star's daughter who has turned out to be a good worker. She trained to run the workhouse floor which in no small part covers the very tall fork lift. It moves things up to a third level storage space. She has some gut, AND I am glad that Rich covered them both. ALSO, there would be a problem if they both took off, but I do not think that is the goal. - Who have we connected to this morning? - We did connect with not only Rich, but with Nihit. I think you have heard most of that as well. He thought a promising idea going to bed, and that he was trying to do his part in taking care of the household and the family. BUT he has a lot of work to do, and he is behind from visiting his parents and

brother this last week. I am believing in him that
he can get the work done. He needs this win. I am a little frustrated in that he is messing with his sleep times, AND he says that he has run out of both his medicines. - What has Ginney learned from the day? - Please.... You can do this! → - Ginney learned that if she throws-up in her kennel, she gets all her bedding washed. It works like magic. - Where have we chosen to go out today? - Our excursion details → - NOWHERE - No farther than Amazon ... gloves, single-serve coffee pot, AND rubber for the bottom of my cane - this is the one my father gave me. I see this as an in-between of now and walker. - What pile of crap have we struggled through? How did we benefit from it? - We searched a good part of the day on how to forgive Rich, but then at one point, it just became natural. He was melting our heart as we stooped to stay mad at him. It is all the holiday cooking processes. I am not sure. He does not know about our single-cup coffee maker. We want to put it on our desk. Lately, Rich is drinking 3+ (tall glasses) coffee, and we left with one. I do not want to start an entire new pot, or use the big pot for half a pitcher, and there is more, but for now ... dinner is ready 6:07PM YAY - How far along are we in the "Win the Day Task?" (Have we boldly gone?) - Win the day → Answer (Make it a blockquote - Did we not say it was DINNER!?? #2022-11-20 ## 2022-11-20 – Evidence 22C – Reading This Week’s Writing Work

A Very Good Morning - How was sleep last night?
- Good morning. It is already 10:47AM as we are starting this, so most of the morning is gone :( We have been reading this week's writing work. It is about fifty-two pages long. We were reading while sitting next to Rich, so we felt good about that. Originally, Nihit had been gone, but he is back now. I tried sending him a note, but he has his ear plugs on, or he is listening to music and has me cut-off. It is ok, I can live with it, although I asked him if he is going to open his screen, so we can see what he is working on too. Seems fair. We leave our screen, so he can relate to our world as he is working. - Anyway, we got up earlier about 5:00AM, Then Rich helped us to fall asleep again, and we woke up dreaming at about 7:15AM. We cannot remember the dream but do remember explaining to Rich who Jerry Lordan was and his importance to our life. I am sure we have talked about him before, but Rich did not remember. - Jerry was a next-door neighbor to where we had lived in Oak Park (IL). We had a puppy crush on him, but between us, we made sure that lines crossed. Unfortunately, lines crossed with our spouses. My ex used it as one of his excuses to move us to Elgin, and Jerry's wife brought us to a movie where someone was cheating with the actor's spouse. Hmm, that was clear. Jerry and I were simply good friends. We kept ourselves company with the kids. I had three and he had two. And, then when we were standing in front of the houses, we would gather other kids, because ... I do not know, just fun and safe, I guess. If I became too home bound, he would just stand in front of our living room window (3-pane), and sometimes he had come up to the door to ring for us all to come out. We (me) talked in broken sentences. He was the block's house husband. One day I had a dream of myself skating next to him covered in mummy's bandages. We were truly clear that there was no touching. - We developed a working relationship. Jerry knew and understood writing and language. And he had a need for a typist. So, we bargained my skills for his skills. I typed part of his English Doctorate thesis, and he gave me writing lessons. That is where my writing really started. We have not stopped since. Jerry earned his degree, and became a principal, I believe, at a private elementary school. AHA! Just found his link online. I had never looked for it before. Mostly he has been extremely far back in my past. Let us see what he is doing now :)

#2022-11-22 ## 2022-11-22 – Evidence 22D – We Just Did
A Major Thing – Dusted - A Brilliant Afternoon - How is the day going? - So far, we are doing ok. We just did a major thing. We dusted the living room - that was major ... we did not hit the bookshelves, but we have about everything else - We had a good Dr. Marvin appointment - Going over processes of how to clean glass surfaces in living room - Discussed chapters with pictures and chapter titles - Discussed speaker deck - Discussed Dr. Austin, Dr. Wemhoff, and Dr. Dorman - How should we adjust course? - We decided we should get something written, so this is it. We wanted to at least get in that we are now as of the last two days, been using Speaker Deck, which used to be Learnist. It bought out. - Just called Rich and discussed medicine pick-up, dinner, surgery. - Ten more minutes, and we should be able to do Ginney. It is getting dark out there faster. AND THEN we must adjust her dinner. She did not eat this morning. We did give her some chicken, but not all. We have some of that for dinner. - Who have we connected to this morning? - We have only talked to our regulars - Rich, Nihit, and Dr. Marvin. There is something to say about all that :) - OH! And we talked to THOM! - First is Rich. We be in contact only with the kinds of things done around our household. He has the materials to make some kind of cold meat sandwiches. Then added to that will be the chips. Glad we did not remember them! He will pick up my medicine tomorrow when he does groceries. Both of us, know that we must be more serious about food because of upcoming surgeries. Mine will be about fifty pounds behind Rich's. - Nihit had a good day and at the end recorded some family interactions, but then he lost it transferring it from the cloud like thing to his journal. I felt bad for him, but I was glad to be reading as he typed! Nihit saw both his psychologist and his psychiatrist - so that was good news too! - Dr. Marvin listed above as to subjects we talked about. There was a lot of figuring out where we were health wise. I have not seen the results. We should look. Hold on.

- That was GREAT! Dr. Marvin as always has done
a spectacular job at reiterating my topics of the day. I will be swimming in this positive note for the next seven days. Everyone gets off for Thanksgiving. And, now that we have dusted, done some picking-up, AND filing, we are feeling a little MORE positive. - The call with Thom was great. He is thinking there is one more day of work, before everyone gets a two- day holiday. He spoke again, highly of the au pair that is collaborating with him from Jamaica. The kids are doing well. He talked about Faye playing a bumping head game with a fluffy blanket. These are the kinds of things that Grandma's live for! He was not sure if he were going to be going out with family Thursday to a friend, but maybe ... that would be excellent for Cathy to see. Thom is not big on holidays, so she has no role model. - There was another encounter. My SIL wrote a note wishing us a happy Thanksgiving by showing us a picture of drinking tea this morning, from a cup given after my mother passed. We did not see the note until the afternoon, but we sent her back a brief note about the new coffee maker - SINGLE SERVE! And wished her Happy Thanksgiving in return. I was going to call them, but I did not know which day was better. Maybe because she made this gesture it is my turn to return. - I guess we really did have a lot of contacts today. It is surprising. If not written down, it would have all forgotten. We are happy to leave a small thread. - What has Ginney learned from the day? - Please.... You can do this! → - I think Ginney learned that if she cannot get me away from this computer, she must hold things a big longer. I must stop that. AND it is a half hour past her dinner. BRB. There we go. She is eating hungrily. She even came up to the counter - HEY! Are we having chicken?! - Where have we chosen to go out today? - Our excursion details → - We have only gone as far as the front porch. We brought a lot of small boxes in, but only opened the obvious coffee maker box. The rest Rich can do. He is better with a blade than we are. We got a small cut on the top of our left finger from opening the one box we opened this morning. Eh. I like him being able to open boxes like Christmas even though a fair share of items are ours. It is like he is handing them over, in all good faith. - What pile of crap have we struggled through? How did we benefit from it? - If we struggled through a pile a crap, it would have been over the dusting. It was hard on us ... it has been for quite a while, and the living room looked like it. So, we cleaned the glass on our computer desk, our writing desk, the cabinet for the printer/scanner, the coffee table small, coffee table large, and the TV area. That was a LOT for us. It feels silly not being able to do this on this side of the wall, but it was. We needed Dr. Marvin time to walk it through mentally. Trivial things like what kind of cleaner to use, what kind of rag, how to pick-up items to move away from the surfaces, AND we had to work on overwhelmed with how much glass surfaces there are in here. We eventually did it, but it was hard.

- We did find easier to do was the kitchen
area after we set up our new coffee pot over the dishwasher area. It was suddenly acceptable to be loading and unloading the dishes or soaking them while we waited the few moments it took to make a cup of coffee. - To be fair, I am excited about being able to work at this time of day. We have still got energy, or more accurately, caffeinated! Sweet. Tonight, we can stay up past 7:30PM. That is what time Rich said we fell asleep last night, and then it took three efforts to wake us up in the morning. Something is wrong there. We are thinking though, only one or two cups in the morning, and one or two cups in the afternoon. I would be pleased if we could type all the way until Rich comes home and makes dinner. We are smashing it! - How far along are we in the "Win the Day Task?" (Have we boldly gone?) - Win the day → Answer (Make it a blockquote) - We have surpassed dusting/cleaning in the living room. Bedroom is next, but only a fourth of the trouble. We can do it! PLUS, we did the mail! Did anyone say that yet? - What was a fun "Ginney moment" for the day? - Rub my tummy! → - She wanted to rub when Nihit called her over. He loves it. We rub her back end, but it is close! - Okay, how did you celebrate today? - Were there crowns given? → - We are giving ourselves a crown for sessions. We have done great today, especially getting in both writing and editing. We dared to press the button that is for editing in Word. It says we are at about 86% accuracy, but seriously there is over 1600 errors of one type or another. But this shared with many days to come. - Today we were able to get to 100% Chapter 1, and Chapter 2. PLUS, we were able to show Dr. Marvin a method of slides we had used before. We have opened doors to getting our material out in the world. We must do a lot more. Hey Nihit ... How do you see SEO? - Oh, one other thought of the last couple of days. We were able to add pictures, to our writing and started a new process we are going to use for titling chapters. We are going in deep! - Ahh, Rich! is here. -Hey! A late note, but we wanted to get it added in because it happened yesterday. Rich came home walked past the coffee pot a few times, but then it caught his eye. He starred at it for a couple of seconds, then shook his head without saying anything. But then he turned around and said something about why we needed this. We gave him several explanations and then it was just over! YAY! We got a new single serve coffee pot, and it was ok!!!

#2022-11-22 ## 2022-11-22 – Evidence 23A – Unclear About What
Supposed To Do Dr. Marvin’s Notes Pt arrived on time. Initially reported feeling unclear about what she was supposed to do. Writer offered several options based on past sessions. Related she had been working on the writing project. Reviewed updates. Pt has continued to work on case file writing - expanding formatting, adding pictures connected to timing of notes, titles to sections. Validated progress and reviewed next steps. Pt has been exploring options for publishing and came across platform she used several years ago - slide decks based on online news articles on dissociation/multiplicity. Reviewed previous process. Compared/contrasted with current writing project and potential for using the platform for distributing her book content. Moved on to medical updates - appointments (podiatry and neurosurgery). Surgeon would like to move forward but would like her to lose weight. Discussed pattern of weight loss/gain over the last several years and next steps for tracking. PCP might have additional resources to help with supporting weight loss. Briefly discussed update on online work and relationships. Ended session with review of home tasks - connected to having people over for Thanksgiving. Would like to keep up with dishes and laundry. Process is working but tends to run out of time in the day. Explored options for setting up time in schedule, using reminders, how to document work done. She had previous tracking systems to utilize again. In the session, these tasks felt difficult to achieve. Reflected on pattern - tasks may seem difficult up front or when trying to take them all in, but when she has broken them into smaller tasks, has been able to make substantial progress and feel accomplished. Global Improvement (CGI-C): Minimally improved Assessment (Depression): - Moods OK today. Has been active with writing and making solid progress. More mixed moods around household tasks. - Current project to process writer's notes in collaboration with personal insights - making meaning of work/life.

- Several ongoing medical follow-ups remain in process. Actively following
up with appts. Neurosurgeon would like to proceed pending potential weight loss. - Working to maintain progress with writing projects and balance with other activities. - Able to contract for safety. Assessment (DID): - Current writing project aiding bringing additional understanding and meaning to work but can be a source of triggered thoughts/affect. - Continues to work to balance time online with writing/reading/household tasks. Getting things ready for Thanksgiving causing more distress – she has more tasks to complete. Has successfully use time tracking to accomplish this in the past. - Review of home videos in background. Goal remains to process smaller pieces of the video as time allows. - Working on larger writing project (trauma narrative) - goals/product/audience. Moving forward on "case file" project. #2022-11-23 ## 2022-11-23 – Evidence 23B – First Thing We Are Writing About - A Very Good Morning - How was sleep last night?

- Good morning! Just us. Feeling a little bit better
now that MOST the dusting done ... still should do the Master and Guest bedrooms. Wow! Cannot believe this is the first thing we are writing about ... YEEKS! Well - it is what is on my mind. - Our Rich meeting is complete." He called me over from the computer to sit down and talk to him. Naturally, I felt like I was going to be in trouble, BUT that was not the case. He was just clearing his head. He had a lot of work and Thanksgiving Day preparation stuff going on. Truly little that we had to do but helping him stay calm - that is a good thing that we CAN do. YAY! - As to dreams and such ... I know we were having them but could not bring to recall. We were able to stay up until about 9:30PM, which is great for us. We told him during the last fifteen that we were sliding into sleep. Hehe ... We are such a lightweight. - How have we been (the previous day)? - We were doing well yesterday. I am glad we were able to get to some writing at the end of the day. That made us feel one TOP of our tiny amount of cleaning, talking to people, and editing, that we were doing very well. PLUS, Rich did not get mad at us for buying the coffee pot - One thing today about which we can get excited. - Just thinking of the new single serve coffee pot, we made Rich a cup of coffee. We were more confident with the 12 oz size than the 16 oz, so we made that for his traveling mug. He can add the rest of what he has from the big pot, so he can have that feeling of not wasting anything. I feel incredibly good at being able to send him off in fine style! - How would we deal with a stressful situation that could trip us up today? - We can be sure to → - Feel a little stressed by walking around our house wondering what to do. And tonight, there will be a lot of peeling of apples. Rich is making apple crisp, and four apples into his stuffing. It will be after dinner when we are more tired. So, that might cause stress, but there is no way out of that one. It is the only "cooking" we do for the holidays. Oh, and we cut some onion and celery too. That is not too bad. Otherwise, Rich cooks everything. Well, our guest usually brings one to two things. Not because Rich needs it, but because they want some of their favorites too. That is fair. It took us a long-time teaching Rich this - Pswhoo! - If we were someone looking at our life from an elevated level, what would we tell ourselves? - An Eagle's eye view → - So far so good - let us not look for problems! - What else are we thinking of? (Morning Pages) - Rich is going to help us open the boxes. Not sure why were such a chicken about this. We want it for the fun first, but as well we want him to know what we got on TOP of what he got so we are not in trouble.

- One word/phrase that could describe the kind of person
we want to be today? - One phrase to rule them all → - I think we are falling into an intimidated role. I would like to stop that. Our success should not fall on whether Rich is in a good mood with us. Ok? Snap out of it. AND he has breakfast ready yay! ### Day-to-Day Goals - Do we have any riveting goals today? Should we have? - Today, we need to write our heart out, edit, and do laundry - I am not saying these are riveting, but right? Like if I had these all done, we would be incredibly happy with our progress - Are all today's food choices in My Fitness Pal (MFP)? How can we get through any slumps? - We have one more muffin for tonight, but yesterday we did well - no reason to believe today will not go well. Whoops. We forgot to tell Rich ... shoot phone is only at 1%. We plugged it in and cleaned off our desk. This is a healthy food/exercise thing - always keep desk cleared off. Much easier to clean too. - What exercising could I commit to today? How much? - We should at least check to see if we could pedal with the special shoes, if not like Rich said change into the others (slippers) while we work to do some peddling. We could it, right? C'mon - like really! AND tomorrow we step on the scale - What can you tell us about the showering experience today? - We need to put a clean dressing on our toe w/o Rich, so that means to take a shower, ever for perfectly no good reason. Hey, I see you slipping already before we start. Could be TWO days in a row. Hey, people do it all the time! - What could we do today, so that someone else can say, "Boldly Go! Howard Wolowitz" - Stick to your plan Garvey ... you can do it AND remember to keep picking trivial things up! - ### Balance - How is our perspective of time going? Are we still on track? - Considering it is only 7:45AM and we are on this question, I would say we are doing very well! Anything we should be doing in addition? Thinking about those clothes. BUT thinking closer to 9-10AM. That would be on track too, right? - What has been going well? - We are up writing right away and saw Rich out the door in attractive shape. We started this morning at 5:05AM and went right to the computer, so Rich could have his meditation time. He did call us over a couple of times, but we did not fall over sitting at our chair! - Today, we have added balance by ...

- Believing in our systems. Just must think of something
more important to be saying to a worldwide level. We are coming up to talking specifically about/to Multiples. Are you gearing up? Hey, we can talk about doing holidays. That is a timely subject! - What could have been better? - A couple more days thinking about holidays specifically to Multiples. We can go back as to trying to get through dusting and the psychological barriers we are going through. Keep remembering sitting under the dining room table to dust the legs off. It was a horrendous task. PLUS, all the cleaning off the upper part. I hated doing the dining room dusting. It was a struggle, like it has been all week. We could go into that. ### Connect-Consume-Cerebrate - Connect → Had a nice talk - With whom? About What? - We had a nice couple of talks to Rich this morning. Most of it was catching him at a positive level in his plans to get everything done by the times our families are over for celebration. Everything is around cleaning and cooking, with some shopping thrown in for good measure. - What did we learn, and what did we contribute toward to the conversation? - We needed to be empathetic, which we were. Not asked about what we were going to do, but if we had, he would say, "Anything you could do to help would be great." I am trying not to take to heart how little Rich is interested in our part of life. He did let me talk about the two doctors we talked to Dr. Marvin about yesterday. He had heard a little about the surgery, but this time he paused and listed until we completed. - Consume → Run Protocol - What did we read/listen/watch this time? - We can read into the situation, that it is ridiculously hard for Rich to slow/speed his mind up to a level that he can pay attention to what is happening outside his mind. This is part of the loneliness I feel. Dr. Marvin listens very well, and my kids can tune in for a couple (only a couple) of moments at a time. Nihit is not obviously as good as Dr. Marvin, but realistically, he knows more about me than Rich or my kids. They know me in their own ways, in that for example, Rich knows how well we are functioning by the amount of work done, that he can see. - Cerebrate → My Brain is the best - What is our brain publicized up on at this time? What triggered these thoughts? Feelings? Behaviors? - Right now, we are more sensitive of others, how Nihit must be feeling. We were able to realize that his families' needs were coming before his own. I must be careful too, because especially Rich can dominate our emotions, so that it affects how we are thinking of ourselves.

- To be "hyped-up" with this, we should be confident
in ourselves with or without Rich's concern. He is not a Nihit or Dr. Marvin, but then again, neither are they a Rich. - Can we put out an elevator Pitch? For ourselves? For others? - Land-ho Matte! Keep it going! Almost reached the shore ### Seriously, as a writer... - What kinds of ideas have come to mind today? Relevancy to a better life? - I think we are going to stretch ourselves and go into a little about holidays. Not enough to tip the barrel, just enough to realize there are a lot of people out there, who are also having trouble getting through the holidays, and you do not have to be a Multiple to know that. - The relevancy to a better life is that we can use our feelings and emotions to tip our thinking to constructing our better life, and then turn and share that with someone else. What is happening, why are we processing it now, and what is its relevancy to a better life for me, and then for others. - What are writing cues which include writing/reading about Multiplicity, trauma, and being a better human being? - I think as to being a Multiple, we are in better range of remembering preparations or visits from family members, who might have given us trouble in the past. For us, what seems to have been one problem is being stuck with uncomfortable work, which was always about others. Like we have strong memories, of everyone in the house, father, mother, brother, and sister, dumping things on the dining room table and stairs, and then it was our job to need relocating these items. At one time, we could remember appreciating others enough to be taking care of their "stuff," but I do not recall that part. The part about being under the table was to reach all the hard to get to chair legs and center part, but another part was that I felt, if I did not breathe, no one would see me under the table. It was part of our being invisible. - We are affecting Multiplicity by ... - It would be an innovative idea, to see the sticky times in our youth our mind triggered into right now, think them through, and then write out better conclusions, especially bringing things up to the current time, so we could better situate ourselves. Secondarily, that might help others. They are going through similar thoughts and feelings. Sometimes, this feels lame. Like I could not do something more constructive. But until we get past these barriers, we do not know how better to help others. First ourselves, and then them. That might be the first lesson. ### Note Making - Ideas Log - Are there any burning ideas to scramble down quickly? - Make a list ... - What are the troubling emotions we are having before, during, or after the holiday - in our case now - tomorrow is Thanksgiving.

1 - Our Notes on our thinking - What is
the story behind the emotion? Where do the feelings surface from our past? - How can we breathe through the emotions now, separate the past from present, and then be able to take a deep sigh, so that the work in the present can continue - How can we best appreciate the difference between where we used to be in the past and the present, and how do we pay homage to those times? - How do you let things go because there are many more days to enjoy. - Are there unanswered questions from the day? - Can we give ourselves enough time to work through the above issues. Decide whether we want to continue writing, or whether we are ready to work on other things. Let these other thoughts percolate a bit. - Idea Expansion (Nick Milo) - How is this new idea (note) relevant to the question(s) I am considering? - The question we are having is how to support self and others. We have produced a few ideas, mostly from Dr. Marvin, but how to best process the circumstances we are now feeling. AND we could also recognize that we let Dr. Marvin go on vacation without saddling him down in negativity. YAY! I mean, we did have work to process, but that is part of the work right now. We could go back to his note from yesterday and see how we were processing things with him. Is it close to the questions we were just asking? - Is this idea (note) like or different from the others to which I am comparing it to? - We are comparing to yesterday, so could we sketch out the ideas/thoughts/concerns we were going through based on Dr. Marvin's note from yesterday? 2 - Our Notes, on Dr. Marvin’s note/thinking - Reported being unclear about what we were supposed to do - Writer offered updates (we could do that) - turned us toward our writing and then reviewed updates (like now) - Validated the work and progress made. Reviewed next steps. - Explored a platform used in the past that used to distribute the work - Moved on to medical updates - appointments and work with weight, including the steps we used for tracking (we might have tracked our problems by additional pounds gained) - Look toward extra resources (doctor) - Briefly discussed updates on work and relationships - Talked about home tasks - connected tasks to people and the holidays

- Discussed wanting to keep up (stay motivated) - Using
reminders and documentation to get the work done, and remember processed, even thought, or ESPECIALLY because the tasks seemed hard - Tasks seemed more difficult upfront (tying emotions toward the past), but after reflecting on patterns and breaking things down to smaller tasks, realized are substantial progress and feelings of accomplishment. - WOW! Are we really looking at the 7Cs before 9AM? You are smokin! - The 7C's of Note Making If we can get through the frightening emotions from the past - there will be cheery company coming up ahead! We have been creating some ideas. First, we wrote out, through our own thoughts, the knowledge we have been processing on how to take care of our stronger holiday emotions (negative/positive). And second, we summarized Dr. Marvin's notes, which are exceptional! He is just so good at what he does. Hey! So are we! We are exceptional! He could know what gifts he gives us, but it would not be fair to understand, he is the most remarkable person we know. Ok, again ... and so aren't we remarkable? You? How many thousands of ideas has he helped us through. But how many ideas do we produce on our own! Many more than thousands, right? This time, we are processing a lot of work on our own. Ok, we will give you that. AND, someday, one day, we will give in a manner that will go on to help others. I think the addition between my ideas, and the ideas that were happening while summarizing Dr. Marvin's notes, is that we had seemed able to see a new pattern. There were three to four waves of any given situation (through his writing), and then there was the part of "appreciating the progress." So that part clearly baked into where we can take these ideas next. It reminds me of a Christmas story. It would make a delightful book, and especially a movie, where all the subtleties of facial emotions added. It is just a part of the worldwide swirl that is the magic of the holidays. You know, though, we are going to need to produce a way of processing more carefully the sections just written by us, and then taken from Dr. Marvin directly. The two written out sections we had completed during our writing, disagree only that one was from our thoughts on our actual work patterns, and then the second found through Dr. Marvin's patterns of thinking through his session notes. The first was more of us caring, in our present processes; to see past the problems that were seeping up through the past, and then managing them. If we can remain conscious of the strong feelings, we can get past the negativity. Also, it seemed key to know that although in the past, we may not have had any control, now in the present, we can control quite a bit, though time is moving along, and that is not in our control. We do, however, control what happens most of our hours, so with that, best to make beneficial use of time. The latter part was that Dr. Marvin was playing out in a singsong way the steps of solving issues, and then again, being very conscious of stepping back and appreciating the progress made. The tasks are similar. The basic song would read that we should accept today's feelings (mixed with the past), explore, and then be able to learn from and then dismiss the feelings from the past, which would

allow space for new feelings. Sometimes we would receive help
and support in the present, sometimes not, but we could reflect on the patterns, and appreciate our progress and our feelings of accomplishment. The part that is bad is that when we tie all our memories to just the hard parts such as cleaning, and it just sits there - we get nowhere, but burying our emotions deeper. But now we have choices. So, we can release a little of that old familiar depression by being aware, and that process will help us to allow for happiness to creep in. It is reminding us of the magic we thought of on the "good side" of what was happening. People were coming over, and we would sometimes drag out the cleaning to the very last moment. But then we could hear our cousin Deb bounding up the stairs in all excitement to our bedroom. The hard part of cleaning would finally be over, things were good enough, and we could find enjoyment with having an extended family. Let us just say, we are being incredibly grateful on this Thanksgiving Eve. The kids will be here soon! Happy Thanksgiving to all! - Solution Prompt - What is the problem → - Our writing feels a little stiff, we are going to have to give it some time, marinate. - What is the solution → - Let it be ... it never hurt anyone! Hehe ... it will be ok - What is the benefit → - We can be so hard on ourselves, that we forget to see our good parts. Such as the part that keeps us thinking, and wondering, and creating, and in seeing so much good in life. But we can change! - So, What Next (Next Action Step?) - We have only a few more sections to write, and then we should clean something, or start the laundry, and empty the dishwasher, and then continue to some editing. We like that! It is long and tedious, but we will make solid gains! AND how about some printing! We have an Intro, plus Chapters one and two, we could print out in the new book. Hey, let us do it! ### Anne & Nihit - Both selves - Perspective - Are we helping ourselves before helping others? How? Let us make this an excellent job! Do not distract! - Yes, we are helping ourselves. We have been getting through some chain like feelings that were occurring around the thoughts of cleaning and preparing for the holidays. But we have resolved some of those issues, and in the process were able to write things down. It is coming along nicely! It will be only

secondarily, that we can share these thoughts and help others.
We distracted so far this morning, and we were able to carry through. HEY! One thing though. Someone forgot to set the timer. Let us get into that today, k? - What difficulties are we having focused on the day outlined? Get your head back in the game! - The timer is important, because it allows us to meander through our work, and not take time into consideration. Somehow, it proves out that time is something we cannot just disregard. If we cannot do it, how could we expect Nihit or others to do it. Just a shot over the bow. - Between us - Nihit and Anne - How was today a gift through Nihit/Ann conversation? - Nihit is always a part of our life, whether a few thoughts away, or close enough to hear his giggle. We are fascinated by his life and his thinking/feeling processes of handling it. We are both some help to each other, like Dr. Marvin says, we tend to rally! That is a gift! - In what way are Nihit and us helping each other today - have we rallied!?? - Absolutely! We got a note from Nihit this morning. I did not think we were going to see him at all today. His grandparents are at his house, and today, although sick - is Vihann's 12th birthday, and there is a party held in celebration. Unfortunately, part of Nihit's note was that Vitty is still sick today. We are going to pull him in and hope that he can rally too! - What could Nihit and us accomplish by talking together with Dr. Marvin? - We hope to share the delight we feel with Nihit with Dr. Marvin. We are like a couple of chipmunks. Furthermore, we would still have to have a direct purpose. Last time we thought - could we plan how to help each other succeed better. We are favoring that direction again. If we produced a list between us as to things, we do together that are successful, we could run the list past Dr. Marvin. Hmm, this is starting to be an idea! We will wait though because we need the time to talk more deeply with Nihit. It will be ok :)

#2022-11-28 ## 2022-11-28 – Evidence 23C – Trip, Fall, Drop
A Very Good Morning - How was sleep last night? - Sleep last night went ok, after our incident with falling at about 9:30PM. Long story short. We forgot to use the washroom before falling asleep. And, then from a very deep sleep, we got up, but caught our foot in the blanket. We were wearing our special shoe, so that did not help. We went down and landed on our knee somehow. We landed on the other side of the living room. We slid forward, so that our shoulder/neck "L-shape" landed around the corner of the room (extended corner). That part did not hurt too much because we stopped before landing too hard. Rich got up immediately. He heard the noise and said, “What was that?!” And, we said, "We fell down." Then he got his frustrated voice on as he was jumping out of bed. He obviously was concerned and was jumping out of bed to help. He tried to help us get up directly, but there was too much give as he tried pulling us up. He suggested after a few moments, that we try crawling to the couch for better support in getting up. That worked but hurt. We did finally get to the bathroom, and then there was the part of trying to settle in. Rich did not want to go to bed until after he was sure we were ok. He had a challenging time calming down. And, then of course, Ginney had her two cents to put in. She waited until we laid down in our couch seat, and put our shoulders back, and then she came over and laid on top of us for about fifteen minutes, until she was sure we were ok. After a short while later, Rich put her to bed and the rest of the night was quiet. The End. - When we woke up the next morning (this morning), We were sore. Our big left toe, and are right small toe were hurting, but the worst was the back of our right knee. It has a slowed down quite a bit this morning. Rich recommended putting some ice on it, and then we thought we could use a cold-water bottle, and that seemed to help. We tried adjusting the light, but Rich was adamant that it was Zen time. We had a tough time settling down with nothing to do in the dark. Fortunately, Rich was able to chat with us. I just wake up with our minds ready to process. It was 45-minutes later, before Rich was ready to move on with his morning. We were up immediately and went to the computer. He did talk to us while we were ALL sitting in the dark, but it was still hard. We were happy to learn that Nihit had already been on the computer. He had written down sessions. And we were ready to go. - Nihit and us both had stories to tell. And, then Aanya came in and started to play. The family got a new panda that was bigger than all the others added up. It is the Mom Panda. It was Amanda panda, but not sure ... that might be the name of one of the smaller pandas. The family is now like 8-fold. Hehe they are going to need renting out an extra room for all of them! Vitty came in for a while as well, but in general, it was mostly Aanya and Nihit playing games, especially with Mama Panda's scarf. Aanya was covering Nihit's eyes and trying to hide his vision, but Nihit was able to keep stating the things he was seeing. That was surprisingly good considering the scarf was wool. Eventually, he had to leave the room, so we left for washroom and medicine. We found Rich in the sitting room. He decided that he might want to try out the room for his Zen in the morning. He just wanted to spend time with us if we got up while he was still there. We took care of things and talked to him for a few moments before he had to go to work. Then we told Nihit with a finger raised while crossing the room, that we would be back. We readdressed our

big left toe ulcer and sat down at the computer,
though Nihit was no longer here. Before he left, we had sweet potatoes, and afterward, we had stuffing. So, THAT has been our morning. YAY! 8:25AM and we are moving ahead. - How have we been (the previous day)? - Yesterday turned out to be an excellent day. It was the day of Rich's kids coming over. We were having in the morning computer time - Nihit might have run past. BUT we started doing some work with the first chapter. There are always edits made. Finally, we sent a copy to Nihit, so we would stop the editing part. Though we replaced our first email, with a second. We then printed out a copy, and instead of pressing the side to slip in the binder, we got out an envelope and decided THAT would be it! No more changes! Then we got curious and started reading that copy over again. One of the things we found ourselves doing both before and after the shower was reading the 18-page chapter by just reading each part's work on its own. We were amazed how in line the part's subjects were. There were strong interests laid out by each, and it was enjoyable for us to read. - There were a few things we discovered. Like the older and younger parts had things playing out, it was really the middle-age parts that carried the show. AND, even more so, we colored Corey's (me) parts in our own color. I have the most written text, so people decided that I would get an easy to spot color on my own. Yay! Thanks! Another thing we discovered was there were a few stories played out (over their own paragraph) with younger parts. You could easily spot them because they were primarily yellow paragraphs. The first was over the "barking spell when Ginney and us were outside, and after a couple cars (we were holding her close), but then two women with a stroller came by and surprised her and she went crazy."" It turns out that Jamie was with them, but it was primarily a story by KC and Casey. That will take some time to think through. And then the second story was about "the cleavage story." As it turns out ... and more of an explanation of how tough that had been, for all of us, was that the story between Anna and Gracey. I do not believe we have ever been conscious of them out interacting among us. We were then specially proud for them telling their story. It was a great feat! - The next part was in being able to leave the computer and our writing. We felt that if we just held onto the writing, we would be ok. It became our security blanket. We had agreed with Rich that we would help him with the fruit salad between 10:00-10:30AM. He was outside for a second, so we went back to the writing but then he came on. Rich had not put everything he needed help without yet, when Nihit signed on. We were supposed to talk three hours earlier, but he had been playing with the kids. We gave him ten minutes knowing that we would want to be at the table cutting board at no later than 10:30AM. Poor Nihit was in a rush then, and we were feeling sorry, but we had made a promise to Rich and everything he scheduled. Then of course, Nihit was in bed by the time we could get back. We had to schedule our shower. We were really feeling overwhelmed knowing that we would have to be around people and away from our work, for such a long time. - But we did it, and it seemed to work out fine. Dr. Marvin would be nodding at this. We did not talk to Rich two sons, but we played the entire time with especially three of the four kids. We were WATCHING though, all four. The youngest just had his first birthday! The others are like four, six, and eight. Something like that. I could not believe how much the younger kids took me in as if I had never been missing from their lives. Usually, Rich does celebrations over at their house, and usually Rich's ex-wife is there, so I choose to hang back, even though we invited, because I want her to have 100% attention of

her grandchildren. She deserves that right as their actual grandmother.
But when do they come here!? I am the one that gets to be with them. We found toys, such as Ginney's, an extra "bin - light enough to wear on their back as a back-pack, and then over their head to do circles in." There were also some dog toys, and some coloring books with crayons. Well mostly the crayons had to go away when the kids' mother found the youngest coloring on the floor. Hehe nice try! We were able to find EIGHT of Ginney's small stuffed squirrels. Who knew?! - Rich made a ton of food, it was good, and everyone liked it. There was a lot of thought going home - the stuff they seemed to like, extra cookies Rich had baked, and some extra back-up desserts. YAY Rich! He was being SUPER-Grampa. We cannot believe how hard he worked. He kept working and working and working! He was amazing, though we worried how he would feel waking up this morning. He did good. He was much more concerned about our fall, and what we were going to do about it. For example, he said from now on, whether sleeping or not, we were going to need going to the bathroom by 9:30PM. I always go before I sleep, but if I fall asleep early, he does not always wake me up. - Jon had brought over some lights that could activate by a phone (both our phones). Rich's birthday is six-days away! This is back to the SUPER-Grampa. I appreciate him not pushing us too much, but we were grateful to do the things we could help. My job is to just look around to see corrections. We passed! OH, and we had an ENJOYABLE conversation with Rich's son-in-law. He had slept through most the time. He came over not feeling well. But Jon eventually woke him up, so he would be alert enough to drive home. And, then just like magic, we started our conversation with RJ, and did not stop until Jon was insisting. Usually what happens before they leave is that we have a long talk with RJ, and Rich gets an uninterrupted time to talk to his son, Jon. There are times when both boys Chris and Jon, are here ... and it seems like there is competition to both interact with Rich at the same time. Hehe. PLUS, grandchildren. He is extremely important! - Afterward, when people had gone home - it was around 7:00PM. Chris' family had gotten here at 1:15PM. And Jon not that much later. But afterward, Rich and us were cleaning up in the kitchen. I had rinsed all the plates and silverware earlier, and dishes stacked nicely. Rich put away the clean dishes while we did simple things like putting away silverware. Where I was trying to help was the jobs where we could do by sitting on our smaller kitchen stool. I found; we could fill the entire dishwasher that way. Rich's job was to cover all the food and find a way to stack it in the fridge. Pswhoo! And, then after, we both sat down very tired. We both snacked a little, but after that, Rich said we were sleeping in fifteen- minutes. And, THAT FOLKS ... is how one throws a party! - One thing today about which we can get excited. - We just thought that we could write for just a little while longer, and then move on to the editing of chapter two! I do not know why that would excite us, but it does. One of the things for sure is that it does not make our hands so sore. This is an after effect of having fallen. I did roll over on my back as part of the fall. Yay! Our hands saved! We do have 217 pages done so far on just the book side, which is twenty-three chapters long. We do not have the cover picture, except the first four chapters, and lastly, there is only ONE complete chapter complete. We need to spread our time out! Whoops, we forgot to set the timer. 1 1/2 50-minute sessions, and then it will be lunchtime, and then afterward, we can edit. Can you all hold off? We skipped FOUR days of writing to edit. A little more? - How would we deal with a stressful situation that could trip us up today?

- We can be sure to → - Oh no
... I do not have anything to write about ... that might trip us up. Why do not we look at a few more questions ;) - If we were someone looking at our life from an important level, what would we tell ourselves? - An Eagle's eye view → - We are proud of you all getting through the first part of the holidays. Second if you count Halloween! That was a lot of candy to have around! - What else are we thinking of? (Morning Pages) - Rich grabbed our attention with counting calories again - in addition to what the doctors crew is going to recommend. I must tell you getting surgery for our back, scared the life out of me. It is going to be hard getting down and up the stairs now with Ginney, but to have surgery AND a fall! That could be an unbelievably bad deal. Not sure we would want to tell our doctor we fall every three to four months. Just four to five months. Ok, that would be like saying we fall two to three times a year. Hard to remember that. - One word/phrase that could describe the kind of person we want to be today? - One phrase to rule them all → - We are going to appreciate our time to write this day and every day! ### Day-to-Day Goals - Do we have any riveting goals today? Should we have? - AHA! We have skipped down five sections to this one. Surely, we could find SOME interests! Oh Goals, I see ... you want SOME riveting goals. - Pull dishes from the dishwasher and put away - Put the dirty dishes in the dishwasher. Most rinsed. - Clean off the dining room table - Clean off the kitchen counter - Wash one load of clothes (tablecloth) - Exclaim - WOW ... those are not riveting! They are more cloud pleasers. Rich would be happy to come home from work after working in the kitchen for five days TO find it completely cleaned-up. That is the part that makes it riveting. - Are all today's food choices in My Fitness Pal (MFP)? How can we get through any slumps? | Mashed Sweet Potatoes - Sweet Potatoes, 1 cup cooked | 266 | Sausage & Apple Stuffing, 2 Serving | 566

| Chocolate chip cookies - Chocolate chip cookies , 2
Cookie| 280 | peanut butter - cookie, 2 cookie 26g | 240 | Add Food Quick Tools | 1,352 of 320 | - [ ] This is THREE times more that we should have had for breakfast ... now can we wait until lunch (10:09AM) - What exercising could I commit to today? How much? - Why don't we see how much cleaning we can do of the ENTIRE house ... can you make your friends bed? - See above list AND keep getting up to move the leg - What can you tell us about the showering experience today? - I would not chance this knee and slipperiness - What could we do today, so that someone else can say, "Boldly Go! Howard Wolowitz" - Boldly hold back now that we have found the second reserve of homemade cookies! Damn that, Rich! - ### Balance - How is our perspective of time going? Are we still on track? - I think we are going ok. We moved around in the kitchen and took our medi0cine 10 minutes early BUT decided not to take another dose of Tylenol for Arthritis until necessary. Just need to stretch. When we first get up is the worst, and then after 30 seconds it becomes more manageable

Chapter 21-22-23 Nihit's Vacation, Being Skitti...

Chapter 21-22-23 Nihit's Vacation, Being Skittish and Stuck, and then Plain Unclear

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