Harnessing the Supernerd Hivemind: the Power of Feedback

Harnessing the Supernerd Hivemind: the Power of Feedback

~20min talk on getting better at soliciting and receiving feedback, delivered at New Relic annual product org offsite.

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Katherine Wu

June 08, 2016
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Transcript

  1. Harnessing The Supernerd Hive Mind: 
 The Power Of Feedback

    KWu Ruby Agent Engineer
  2. a case study: is how you handle feedback important?

  3. intro > case study

  4. intro > case study

  5. intro > case study

  6. intro > case study

  7. intro > case study

  8. intro > case study

  9. intro > case study

  10. intro > case study

  11. intro > case study “You have given us helpful information…


  12. intro > case study “You have given us helpful information…


    please don’t ever do that again.”
  13. intro > you need feedback to know if you’re succeeding

  14. intro > what is feedback?

  15. intro > what is feedback? everything!

  16. intro > what is feedback?

  17. intro > what is feedback? who is asked what is

    said what is met with enthusiasm what actions are taken
  18. intro > what is feedback? who is asked what is

    said what is met with enthusiasm what actions are taken …or not …or not …or not …or not
  19. why people hesitate to give feedback

  20. why people hesitate > 2. 3. 1. uncertainty about reception

  21. why people hesitate > 1. uncertainty about reception people have

    baggage that you have no control over
  22. why people hesitate > 2. belief that nothing will change

    3. 1. uncertainty about reception
  23. why people hesitate > 2. belief that nothing will change

    put themselves out on a limb…
 for nothing.
  24. why people hesitate > 2. belief that nothing will change

    3. large effort for right tone 1. uncertainty about reception
  25. why people hesitate > 3. large effort for right tone

    problem gets worse with more levels
  26. why people hesitate > 3. large effort for right tone

    “I make mistakes like the next man. In fact, being —forgive me—rather cleverer than most men, my mistakes tend to be correspondingly huger."
  27. why people hesitate > 3. large effort for right tone

    “I make mistakes like the next man. In fact, being —forgive me—rather cleverer than most men, my mistakes tend to be correspondingly huger."
  28. why people hesitate > 3. large effort for right tone

    difficult to get feedback as you’re more senior
  29. why people hesitate > 3. large effort for right tone

    people feel it isn’t “their place”
  30. why people hesitate > 3. large effort for right tone

    “Execs don’t get told when something is going wrong.”
  31. why people hesitate > 3. large effort for right tone

    “Thermocline of Truth”
  32. why people hesitate > 3. large effort for right tone

    “Thermocline of Truth”
  33. why people hesitate > 3. large effort for right tone

    “Thermocline of Truth”
  34. why people hesitate > 3. large effort for right tone

    “Thermocline of Truth”
  35. why people hesitate > 3. large effort for right tone

    “Thermocline of Truth”
  36. why people hesitate > 3. large effort for right tone

    “Thermocline of Truth”
  37. why people hesitate > 3. large effort for right tone

    “we want to bring bad news into the light”
  38. why people hesitate > 3. large effort for right tone

    “…only works if there is no shame or fear.”
  39. why people hesitate > definitely a 2-way street

  40. 2. prove sincerity 3. help others help you 1. get

    truly comfortable
  41. 2. prove sincerity 3. help others help you 1. get

    truly comfortable
  42. 1. get truly comfortable > Mr Ginn’s advice

  43. 1. get truly comfortable > a story “You’ll want to

    ask your friend, but they’ll just be nice.”
  44. 1. get truly comfortable > a story “But really, you

    should ask someone who’s going to just tear into it, just like, really rip it apart.”
  45. 1. get truly comfortable > a story “But really, you

    should ask someone who’s going to just tear into it, just like, really rip it apart.”
  46. 1. get truly comfortable > a story “You know who

    you should ask?”
  47. 1. get truly comfortable > a story “You know who

    you should ask?”
  48. 1. get truly comfortable > a story “KWu!!! She has

    no mercy!”
  49. 1. get truly comfortable > a story “KWu!!! She has

    no mercy!”
  50. 1. get truly comfortable > a story

  51. 1. get truly comfortable > a story …probably doesn’t make

    you want to ask me for edits!
  52. 1. get truly comfortable > a story …probably doesn’t make

    you want to ask me for edits! (I’m nicer now, promise!)
  53. 1. get truly comfortable > identity & work

  54. 1. get truly comfortable > people can sense our discomfort

  55. 1. get truly comfortable > some ways to help yourself

    accept feedback better
  56. 1. get truly comfortable > ways to help yourself accept

    2. 3. 1. be authentic
  57. 1. get truly comfortable > ways to help yourself accept

    2. 3. 1. be authentic
  58. 1. get truly comfortable > ways to help yourself accept

    > 1. be authentic be honest with yourself
  59. 1. get truly comfortable > ways to help yourself accept

    > 1. be authentic be honest with yourself
  60. 1. get truly comfortable > ways to help yourself accept

    2. recognize your emotions 3. 1. be authentic
  61. 1. get truly comfortable > ways to help yourself accept

    > 2. recognize emotions
  62. 1. get truly comfortable > ways to help yourself accept

    > 2. recognize emotions
  63. 1. get truly comfortable > ways to help yourself accept

    > 2. recognize emotions
  64. 1. get truly comfortable > ways to help yourself accept

    > 2. recognize emotions
  65. 1. get truly comfortable > ways to help yourself accept

    2. recognize your emotions 3. choose to be informed 1. be authentic
  66. 1. get truly comfortable > ways to help yourself accept

    > 3. be informed don’t have to use the proposed solution
  67. 1. get truly comfortable > ways to help yourself accept

    > 3. be informed but getting information
  68. 1. get truly comfortable > ways to help yourself accept

    > 3. be informed prioritization is up to you
  69. 1. get truly comfortable > ways to help yourself accept

    2. recognize your emotions 3. choose to be informed 1. be authentic
  70. 1. get truly comfortable > it’s hard “If someone thinks

    I’m doing something wrong, then they’ll just tell me.”
  71. 1. get truly comfortable > it’s hard THIS IS A

    TRAP!!!
  72. 1. get truly comfortable > it’s hard “We don’t come

    up with market-dominating products as a team of 1.” Amy Boyle
  73. 1. get truly comfortable > it’s hard What Google Learned

    From Its Quest to Build the Perfect Team
  74. 1. get truly comfortable > it’s hard “psychological safety”

  75. 1. get truly comfortable > it’s hard allows people to

    take risks
  76. 1. get truly comfortable > it’s hard allows people to

    take risks BE BOLD
  77. 1. get truly comfortable > it’s hard goal: psychological safety

  78. 1. get truly comfortable > it’s hard goal: psychological safety

  79. 2. prove sincerity 3. help others help you 1. get

    truly comfortable
  80. 2. prove sincerity > 2. 3. 1. examine reaction to

    dissent
  81. 2. prove sincerity > 1. reaction to dissent words of

    power
  82. 2. prove sincerity > 1. reaction to dissent do you

    favor people who agree?
  83. 2. prove sincerity > 1. reaction to dissent “Upscale Survey

    Results”
  84. 2. prove sincerity > 1. reaction to dissent “What else

    should I consider here? I might be wrong!”
  85. 2. prove sincerity > 1. reaction to dissent things to

    do more of:
  86. 2. prove sincerity > 1. reaction to dissent things to

    do more of: 1. show excitement
  87. 2. prove sincerity > 1. reaction to dissent things to

    do more of: 1. show excitement (passionate!)
  88. 2. prove sincerity > 1. reaction to dissent things to

    do more of: 1. show excitement 2. disagree in the open (passionate!)
  89. 2. prove sincerity > 1. reaction to dissent things to

    do more of: 1. show excitement 2. disagree in the open 3. have an anonymous channel (passionate!)
  90. 2. prove sincerity > 2. make people feel heard 3.

    1. examine reaction to dissent
  91. 2. prove sincerity > 2. make people feel heard be

    appreciative
  92. 2. prove sincerity > 2. make people feel heard >

    be appreciative
  93. 2. prove sincerity > 2. make people feel heard >

    be appreciative
  94. 2. prove sincerity > 2. make people feel heard >

    be appreciative
  95. 2. prove sincerity > 2. make people feel heard >

    be appreciative
  96. 2. prove sincerity > 2. make people feel heard >

    be appreciative “creepy twin outfits”
  97. 2. prove sincerity > 2. make people feel heard >

    be appreciative show appreciation especially when people deliver hard messages
  98. 2. prove sincerity > 2. make people feel heard >

    Feedback is a gift.
  99. 2. prove sincerity > things to do more of:

  100. 2. prove sincerity > things to do more of: 1.

    pass Turing test of perspective
  101. 2. prove sincerity > things to do more of: 1.

    pass Turing test of perspective 2. assume best intentions
  102. 2. prove sincerity > things to do more of: 1.

    pass Turing test of perspective 2. assume best intentions 3. listen & ask questions on mental model
  103. 2. prove sincerity > things to do more of: 1.

    pass Turing test of perspective 2. assume best intentions 3. listen & ask questions on mental model (connected!)
  104. 2. prove sincerity > 2. make people feel heard 1.

    examine reaction to dissent
  105. 2. prove sincerity > 2. make people feel heard 3.

    tell people what happens 1. examine reaction to dissent
  106. 2. prove sincerity > 2. make people feel heard 3.

    tell people what happens (accountable) 1. examine reaction to dissent
  107. 2. prove sincerity > 3. tell people what happens “without

    a response, people will stop speaking”
  108. 2. prove sincerity >

  109. 2. prove sincerity >

  110. 2. prove sincerity > O S A A

  111. 2. prove sincerity > O S A A

  112. Opinions As A Service! 2. prove sincerity > O S

    A A
  113. 2. prove sincerity > (but most people are not like

    that.)
  114. 2. prove sincerity > it’s your responsibility to get feedback

    for yourself
  115. 2. prove sincerity > “If you haven’t deliberately created an

    environment that welcomes candor and makes it safe for people to speak freely, you can’t assume that they are.”
  116. 2. prove sincerity 3. help others help you 1. get

    truly comfortable
  117. 3. help others help you > 2. 3. 1. explain

    context & give direction
  118. 3. help others help you > 1. explain context &

    give direction give people time to prepare
  119. 3. help others help you > 1. explain context &

    give direction make it easy
  120. 3. help others help you > 1. explain context &

    give direction what should I… do more of do less of continue doing
  121. 3. help others help you > 1. explain context &

    give direction 30% vs. 90% feedback
  122. 3. help others help you > 2. ask the right

    questions 3. 1. explain context & give direction
  123. 3. help others help you > 2. ask the right

    questions 3. give feedback on the feedback 1. explain context & give direction
  124. 3. help others help you > 3. give feedback on

    the feedback “What was particularly helpful to learn was…”
  125. putting this into practice

  126. conclusion > feedback I’d like to get


  127. conclusion > good places to eat
 feedback I’d like to

    get

  128. conclusion > good places to eat
 how amazing this talk

    was!!! feedback I’d like to get

  129. conclusion > good places to eat
 how amazing this talk

    was!!! (“what resonated”)
 feedback I’d like to get

  130. conclusion > good places to eat
 how amazing this talk

    was!!! (“what resonated”)
 what was surprising?
 feedback I’d like to get

  131. conclusion > good places to eat
 how amazing this talk

    was!!! (“what resonated”)
 what was surprising?
 what am I missing? feedback I’d like to get

  132. conclusion > good places to eat
 how amazing this talk

    was!!! (“what resonated”)
 what was surprising?
 what am I missing? feedback I’d like to get

  133. conclusion >

  134. conclusion > “Whenever I talk to KWu, I feel she

    is running an experiment…

  135. conclusion > “Whenever I talk to KWu, I feel she

    is running an experiment…
 …and I’m the lab rat.”
  136. conclusion > ! thank you for being my lab and

    especially: John Hyland, Amy Boyle, Erika Arnold, Alice Goldfuss, Ashley Puls, Ruby Andrews, Balki Kodarapu, Katie Leonard, Jason Clark, Darin Swanson, Ted Pennings, Seth Engelhard, Caito Scherr, Zoe Kay, Rebecca Holzschuh, Matt Wear, Noelle Daley, Tobby Lugo
  137. appendix

  138. outline 1. get truly comfortable 2. prove sincerity 3. help

    others help you be authentic examine how you react to dissent explain context & give people direction recognize & name your emotions make people feel heard ask the right questions choose to be informed tell people what happens give feedback on the feedback
  139. more things to do more of 1. ask for feedback

    regularly 2. explicitly draw people out 3. talk about norms on how feedback should be delivered 4. let other people offer ideas first
  140. more things to say • “If you had to poke

    holes in this, what would you say?” • “I’m not 100% sold that this is the way to go, so would really like to hear other perspectives on it.” • “I hadn’t thought of that before!” • “This was a great thing to flag for us to think through.” • “Thank you for talking to me about this. I’m really glad to have a chance to talk with you about it.”
  141. references http://brucefwebster.com/2008/04/15/the-wetware-crisis-the- themocline-of-truth http://quickbase.intuit.com/blog/the-real-reasons-your-team-isnt-telling- you-what-they-think http://quickbase.intuit.com/blog/how-to-get-your-staff-to-be-more- candid-with-you http://femgineer.com/2016/06/feedback-got-frenzy-learn-filter/

  142. giving feedback http://firstround.com/review/thoughts-on-gender-and-radical-candor/ http://www.askamanager.org/2016/02/my-employee-wants-to-be- micromanaged.html https://speakerdeck.com/rmw/frameworks-for-feedback-long- version-2016-may-self-conference

  143. “Hang in there” motivational poster Admiral Ackbar, Star Wars Episode

    VI: Return of the Jedi Harry Potter (book series) Michelle Tanner, Full House (TV show) meme references