8-3 FAQs | More On Obstacles

Transcript

1. Module 8 - FAQ: more on obstacles Wed, 4/27 9:50AM 8:45 SUMMARY KEYWORDS notifications, calendar, timer, reminder, module, wagon, consistent, ignore, solution, obstacles, set, medicine, door, turned, leaving, inconsistent, remind, alarm, track, week SPEAKERS Patricia Sung Patricia Sung 00:00 Hi. There, my mom, welcome back to module eight frequently asked questions. And the ones we're going to enter in this video are a little more from Module Three, there are a couple areas where you guys ask questions and talking about our obstacles. So one of them is talking about notifications, how do you balance having all the reminders and notifications pop up on your phone and like, it gets to be too much, and then you start ignoring things. But also, if you don't have enough reminders, then you start to lose track of doing things. Patricia Sung 00:35 So what's helped me is that I get rid of all the notifications for everything extra, the only notifications I have on my phone are the things that I will for sure, need to know about. So things like phone calls, text messages, and calendar items. I really don't have any other notifications, like no Instagram, Fox or Group Me, Facebook, all that stuff is muted, because I like doing those things. And I will remember to go in and look Instagram, I will not forget, because it's entertaining. So I don't really have to worry about like missing something. And really like nothing's going to happen on Facebook that's like, oh, no, I missed No, like, it'll be fine. So I delete or not delete, I've turned off all the notifications for anything that is not like entirely important because otherwise I end up with a full screen of notifications. And I then ignore the important stuff. Patricia Sung 01:41 And then when I set talk about like, when I look at actually making notifications for the calendar items, I make sure that it's relevant to that one. So the defaults I have set I told you about that in in module three. And it's only a default that I need. And make sure I turn off notifications like you know, I have everyone's birthday in my calendar. And I have a notification like two weeks ahead of time because that's when I need to make sure that I bought a present or made a plan
2. or send a card and then like the day before, so make sure that you actually did that thing I might forgotten. Or if it's like for a birthday like on that day so I call the person and get rid of all the extra stuff. Patricia Sung 02:25 So like in that case, I don't need a 10 minute reminder just send somebody every day card. HS need like two week one. So clearing those out at the time not waiting like going back. I'll do that later. Really check with that. I won't I won't we won't we're not gonna do it. So fix that notification then. So that's only what you need. Get rid of all the other junk you don't need those things. The second question I got is on that like same note is timers I use a lot of timers use timers for everything. Hello timer so much. Um Okay, sorry. I just thought it was like dude, I supposed to have this right now. Yes, I am. Sorry, ADHD moment. Hello, paranoid. Okay. Patricia Sung 03:12 So for timers, I set the timer. Exactly when I need to walk out the door for somewhere for anything that happens consistently. So for example, swim lessons 10am Tuesdays, I will set an alarm for like 942 Because at that point, it's like if we do not put on shoes and walk out the door, we are going to be like, too far ahead of time, then I'll snooze it, and ignore it and then be like I have like a reminder for like, when we need to do stuff, like during the day, picking up kids who are school activities. I have alarms for taking my medicine. I have alarms for everything. So I have the label. So when it pops up, it's not just a random alarm, it literally says like eat your medicine and a snack or leave for swim class, or go pick up your teeth. There's a reminder right now. I need to take my medicine. So um yeah, so timers for everything. Patricia Sung 04:21 One of the questions I got was like, Am I crazy for setting a timer for lunch? No, you're not. If you're gonna forget to eat lunch and eat lunch then set a timer. It doesn't matter what everybody else thinks about it. It matters that you're taking care of yourself and if that's what we're so works, so you do you set that timer, if anybody gives you a stinky look on their face, not yours. Patricia Sung 04:44 Okay, third question for Module Three. Tell you about obstacles. One of the major questions I get probably more than any of these other ones combined is how do we stay consistent with our calendar like I do go to that for a little while and I fall off the wagon. Patricia Sung 05:02 And my answer that is don't expect to be consistent, you are not going to be consistent, like expect yourself to be inconsistent. Because when we focus on why we aren't being consistent, we're focusing on our error. And we're focusing on like the thing that we keep messing up
3. instead of the solution. And so we're over here beating ourselves up for not doing something when like, that's not how our brain is built, it's never going to happen that way, we are not going to be consistent. So let's let that go. And instead, we're going to focus our energy on like, how am I going to overcome being inconsistent? And where like, what am I going to do to set myself up for success? Patricia Sung 05:38 So one of the ways I know that I'm getting off track is because I turned into a hot mess. That's a trigger for like, Oh, hey, I am running around like a chicken, my head cut off because I wasn't looking at my calendar is getting overwhelmed. I didn't know a plan for the day like that brings me around. I'm like, okay, that's my why that's my motivation, I need to go back to my why, and remind myself, this is why I'm doing this. So when I fall off the wagon, if the ground that's it reminds me, when I, you know, remind myself, this is why I'm doing this, that will help me come back around. And then think about, you know, the whole point of Module three is, what is it that you need to overcome your obstacles? If this is one for you? It's where's your accountability? Do you have it written somewhere that you're going? Like, are you leaving it out so that you can see it? Is it a visual thing? Are you bundling it with something you're already doing? Or were you trying to reinvent the wheel and make it extra hard? bundle it with something that you're gonna do every day. Patricia Sung 06:41 So you know, if you drink coffee every morning, put the calendar next to the coffee pot, because you're gonna see it in the morning when you wake up. If you'd have, like, you know, if you'd have a roommate or a partner or spouse, best friend, and somebody who will be there to help you when they see, you know, you're falling off the wagon, or they noticed that you you know, you made an appointment and you didn't write down they'd be like, Hey, where's your shoulder? In a way that's not going to make you angry? Cuz RSD and all that good stuff. So think about it for you. What are the ways that you know you're going to get off track? And what are the things you're going to plan for ahead of time to get back on track because we are going to be getting consistent, we are going to fall off the wagon, we're gonna we're gonna forget. Patricia Sung 07:30 Our job is to be creative planning, creative problem solvers ahead of time, and come up with whatever many ways that you have solutions for that and you're gonna try them out and it's like, okay, well, when my husband reminded me, it just made me irritated. So that's not a good solution. Let me try. Next one. Okay, leaving it out on the calendar because they see it first in the morning. That's helpful. Patricia Sung 07:59 Maybe having a post it note on your sink that says did you look at your calendar for tomorrow? Use that when you start to ignore that post it note, put it on the shower door, or put it on the bathroom door, move it around so that you'll see it there's plenty of good reminder queues out
4. there. Try them out, mix it up, try new and when it stops working, but find those solutions to address the problem you know, you will have instead of expecting yourself to just not have a problem. Alright, that is it for our obstacles, FAQ s and I will see you to submit it for the next one.