TMM_Module_4-8

Transcript

1. 4-8 FAQ_ How to figure out your chains in more detail - Modu... Mon, 3/21 9:19PM 5:50 SUMMARY KEYWORDS wrapping, anchor, preschool, eat, wiggle room, noon, realistically, clean, longer, lunch, sandwich, finishing, calculate, pick, sit, work, chain link, brain, optimally, desk SPEAKERS Patricia Sung Patricia Sung 00:01 Hey there, I had a question from a student. And I thought this would be helpful for you as well. In this activity, we're talking about how to figure out our chain link, one of the moms asked like, do I have to go in and calculate every single thing around that anchor? Like getting it ready, putting it away? The whole, all the details, like we need to count all that up? Patricia Sung 00:20 While you could do that, to most ADHD brains, that is very overwhelming. So what I'm looking at the big picture here, is trying to figure out what are your boundaries for this activity? What's the latest you can start? Where you're going to run into a problem? Where Where would be like the optimal time to start? And then when you're finishing up? What's the latest that you can wrap up without creating a disaster? With optimally Where are you trying to wrap this up? Patricia Sung 00:48 So we think about, like a reminder, this is a first draft, right? So let's go in and look real quick at, let me pull up this other thing here up, come on computer. Oh, hold on, let me pause this here, we're on this computer. Okay, so you're going to get this template in module six. This looking at our like, we can hold if I'm looking at for just this one anchor, for example, on Monday, one of my anchors is picking up my son from preschool at noon. Now, in my brain, picking him up at noon means I need to like leave at noon. But that does not account for actually walking out the door and driving and all that stuff. Patricia Sung 01:30 So I have to think backwards, where is a good time for me to be wrapping things up so that I can get there on time. And worse, like my my drop dead time, like you may not do any more
2. can get there on time. And worse, like my my drop dead time, like you may not do any more things you have to leave. For me, I think we live really close to a preschool. So I can like, if it's like do or die, I can stop at 1150 As long as like assuming I have everything ready to go grab my purse, hop in the car and get there for noon. And it's okay. Realistically though, I would like to be wrapping up at like 1140 so that I can, you know, finish up what I'm doing. Patricia Sung 02:12 Visually get my stuff together and not running around like a chicken with my head cut off and go things. If I have time I can like, kind of start thinking like, what are we gonna eat for lunch? What do I need to prep anything? Do I need to make the sandwich ahead of time. Because for example, like, he's very hungry when he gets home and like we need to eat right away, or we hit hangry melt on stage. So like, sometimes I'll make the sandwich before I go so that we like literally be like, walk in the door wash hands, sit down and eat this food? Um, no, I think about like, the back end is like, Okay, we've eaten lunch, we cleaned up and then he goes and does a quiet time. Well, I can do some stuff around the house. So realistically, you know, we're eating lunch from, we get home by 1215. We're eating lunch 1245. And by finishing by 12:45. So like realistically, like without rushing, we can be going upstairs like one 1:15. Patricia Sung 03:13 If I were not to sit and think all that through, like I give you the quick version there, I would tell you that that whole thing like, I would think I can stop what I'm doing, go pick them up, eat lunch, and I'm back at my desk working, I would have told you like 12:30 or 12:45, which is totally unrealistic. So I need to think through like, all the things but I don't have to sit here and be like, it will take me five minutes to eat to make a sandwich, it will take me seven minutes to clean up the dishes. If we don't have to get that detailed of it, we're looking for that rough draft. So we can kind of have an idea of I shouldn't be stopping between 11:40 and 11:50. And I shouldn't be wrapping up and cleaning up everything. And at my desk probably like one 1:15 That's my like wiggle room of okay. Patricia Sung 04:00 But also like, if we are to take a little extra time, I don't have another diehard thing happening until school pickup at 2:30. So if it would take a little bit longer, it's not a big deal. So I know that like on the front end, that's a harsh cut off. I must pick my child up by a certain time. We have the flexibility there on the backside. But I also don't want to be dragging on where I feel like I'm not getting the things done that I need to get done. So that's what I want you to think about when you're looking at how do I calculate these wiggle room? Like chains? How much time do I have in this to work with this anchor is that we want a pretty good estimate. And then from there, we'll be able to adjust because like I said my original estimate was now that I know that now because I've been doing this anchor for probably two years now. So there's plenty of practice in there. Of I like actually longer than that because my other son went to this preschool to like I have been picking up for many years. So I have that experience to draw from. Patricia Sung 05:06
3. Whereas my original brain would have been like, I know that like 20 minutes. No again. So this is what we're looking at when we're trying to create these anchors, do your best at a fairly good estimation. And then as you're doing them all these things as you're putting them into practice, you'll see what fits and what doesn't. Because you have the mind of I am approaching this like a science experiment. I'm going to try things. They're not going to work. I'm going to fix them. And knowing that it's not going to be right the first time, there's no way for you to know magically what's going to be the right schedule for your family on the first try. There's no way so we're just gonna throw that expectation on for now. Patricia Sung 05:45 All right, good luck. Let me know what questions you have here.