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9-4 FAQ | More on the Eisenhower Matrix

9-4 FAQ | More on the Eisenhower Matrix

More Decks by Patricia Sung | Motherhood in ADHD

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  1. Module 9: to do lists eisenhower explained Sun, 5/1 8:43PM

    8:43 SUMMARY KEYWORDS urgent, important, category, emergencies, eisenhower, prioritizing, time wasters, goalposts, book, plan, brain, feel, calls, matter, laundry, matrix, library, dalton, worth, wasters SPEAKERS Patricia Sung Patricia Sung 00:00 Hey there, mom. So I wanted to dive a little more into the Eisenhower matrix. And some of the moms had questions about some examples on this. And so conveniently, I was reading Tony Dalton's the joy of missing out. And I really like following her, I pretty sure she doesn't have ADHD. But you know, she has some really good stuff in her book and her podcast. And I added her verbiage in here. Patricia Sung 00:26 So the words in italics, here are the categories that she's renamed the Eisenhower matrix with. And I just, I felt like a pull to add this video, in actual fact, because prioritizing is really hard for us. So being able to sort our to do lists into these tasks and take that time is a huge step for us. Because our brain is not going to do it for us, we have to like, sit down and make the plan like this doesn't come automatically to us. Patricia Sung 00:55 So we're gonna first talk about the urgent and important category. This is where we need to start. But it's also we don't want to spend all of our time here because downtime, this is the stuff that's like on fire, it is urgent, and it's important, and it's got to get done right now. Well, we end up with a lot more things in this category when we're not good at planning. And things have gotten like left to the last minute, we end up with more things in this area, which is more overwhelming. Patricia Sung 01:22 So I want to encourage you that as you start to create a plan. And like like if you decide that you want to join the routines class that's comes after this, like, those things are going to take a lot of things off your plate, and put them into like automatic things that you do every day so
  2. that you're not ending up with as many things in

    this category. Because this category will consume your day very quickly. We'll give you an example, urgent and important. Your kid has some kind of like, activity, and they knew the uniform for their game today. It is now urgent and important that this gets done. But you know what, if you have a laundry system in place, then you're not having emergency laundry situations very often, like gash or something's gonna come up here and there. But as a whole, you're not going to have urgent and important laundry emergencies, right? So yes, we have to deal with these things right away, because they are important, and they have to happen right now. But if we're spending all of our time on the emergencies, then we're not getting into what's important, but not urgent. And this is what so I'm sorry. Patricia Sung 02:25 So Tanya calls this the escalate category, like it's important you got to do with it. But I love that she calls this the Cultivate category, when things are important, but not urgent. These are actually the things like we need to make a plan to get them done later. But generally speaking, these are the things that are really important. And these are the things we need to be cultivating. So for example, like, I need to look into, you know, retirement plans. Well, that's really important. It's not urgent, like that's so far away, right? So we don't think about it now. But these are the things that matter in the grand scale of wife, like your retirement plan is very important, even more so than like a laundry emergency, right? So this is where we want to make sure that we're carving out time in our day to deal with the things that we need to cultivate. Then reminder for me medicine. See, there's one of my tactics. ADHD, oh, okay, on to back. zonin. Patricia Sung 03:24 Okay. The next one is the urgent but not important things. This is what she calls a comedy. There are lots of things that again, they pop up because they feel like emergencies, and we forgot about stuff. So they are they're more urgent things that pop up. But there's a lot of things that just aren't important. And so for example, like we have library books to do like that are due today. Yes, it is urgent, because I don't want to have a late like overdue fee. But it's not that important Patricia Sung 03:52 . Like when I look at my big picture. If I swing by the library, I'm going to be 10 minutes late to my appointment. Is it worth like the 50 cent late fee to be 10 minutes late? Probably not like it probably be better to be on time and take the 50 cent penalty. But a lot of times our brain doesn't recognize that. And our brain just sees the urgent and feels like it's gotta get it done now. So in being able to like separate that we can take the time to be like, is this really important? Like do I have to do it? No, like maybe I can get my teenager to drop off these library books on the way or maybe it'll be okay. If I do it tomorrow, and I just suck up the 50 cent fee. I still live was cheaper than buying the book right? It gives us that chance to look at the big picture. Because our brain is going to see the urgent before it sees the important.
  3. Patricia Sung 04:47 And then the last one she flat

    out calls time wasters. Things that are not urgent and not important. So do you really need to do this? It's all are there so many? Like, it's just it's hard to say no. It's hard to not do things, especially when other people expect it of us. But realistically, we only have so much time in a day, like we just don't have the ability to do all the things. So some some things are going to have to be eliminated. They are time wasters. Because what's more important, the things that are up here, the things that are in, escalate and cultivate. So I know it's hard. But there are going to be things that we have to say no to, and it might feel important at the time, but it's not actually important. Patricia Sung 05:45 So things like extra volunteer commitments, or, you know, I love the example that Tonya gives in the book, the joint missing out, she says there's, you've got to return to target, it's the last year you can return it. And you feel like this is both urgent and important, right? Like you don't want to lose your $15. And you also it's the last day, but if you have to cut something out, is that worth the like, 30 minute trip in your day? Could you better spend that 30 minutes somewhere else? And like give that shirt to a friend? Like can you predict it for a birthday gift for someone? Can you give it to a friend at church who could use a new shirt. Patricia Sung 06:37 Like, for some people, like it's not even worth that 30 minutes, because you just have too much to do that day, it's not worth it. And that's hard for us to accept these, like, I don't want to start with $13, right. But we also can look at that and be like, you know what I learned a lesson of, I shouldn't have just thrown that in my cart and bought it, I should have taken the time. And I know you say that I don't like the word should but like teaching ourselves a lesson here, like next time, I'm not going to just throw it in the cart, I am going to either try it on, or I'm just not going to buy it. And that's okay to be like, Hey, that was a $15 lesson I learned. Let me find a good way to use this shirt for something else. So in our minds, very few things are going to fall in this time wasters category. Because we are going to feel like all the things are important, our brain is not good at prioritizing. Patricia Sung 07:35 So when you have to sit through and sort them all, and look at each thing individually and put it in the different categories, it gives you more perspective to say whether or not this thing is really worth getting done. Does it really matter to you? Does it actually need to be accomplished? Can you give it to someone else? Can you let it go? And over time this skill gets developed. So I don't want you beating yourself up at the beginning. Like this is something that you'll start to find your goalposts, that you might be in a season where that $15 matters, and you're getting that shirt back. And there's gonna be times in your life. You're like, you know what, this is now my sister's birthday gift and we're moving on with our lives. Patricia Sung 08:15 Okay, so you will develop that skill as you go and your goalposts will be different than my
  4. Okay, so you will develop that skill as you go

    and your goalposts will be different than my goalposts. But you will get better and better at dividing your tasks into these categories as you go. So, hopefully that was a more thorough explanation for you. It makes a little more sense on how to divide your items up into the Eisenhower matrix. And Alright, let's get into the next video.